Hey, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Monday. How are you? Halloween is just two weeks away and fashion retailer ASOS is getting in the spirit by selling a glow-in-the-dark "dripping blood" necklace. Unfortunately the Internet, which constantly has its mind in the gutter, was quick to point out that the choker also resembles, ahem, a different bodily fluid.
It's semen. It looks like semen. And now we'll never be able to unsee it. The Internet strikes again. But hey, to be fair, there are far worse sexy Halloween costumes out there than wearing fake blood sperm around your neck. It's way better than sexy Ken Bone.
Charlie Carver and Kala Brown went missing from their apartment in Anderson, South Carolina on August 31th. Since then, none of their friends or family have heard from them, which makes it all the more disturbing that Carver's Facebook account continues to be updated with creepy memes, quotes, and even private messages.The Daily Beast's Kelly Weill has written an in-depth exploration of this story... it's a must-read, but keep the lights on. Apparently, Carver, 32, and Brown, 30, disappeared without a trace, leaving their apartment unlocked. Their phones were dead. They didn't bring basic necessities like contact lenses and medication, but their dog was left alone in the apartment without food or water. Ominously, the dog's carrier was nowhere to be found. Police are searching for the couple, but haven't found any physical clues. The only clues are coming from Carver's Facebook profile. On October 1st, someone updated his timeline with life updates from the past months, claiming that he and his girlfriend were expecting a daughter on July 1st, that they had bought a house on August 1st, and that they were married on September 1st. None of these are true. In addition, whoever has access to Carver's account keeps posting ominous memes with messages like “Sometimes late at night I dig a hole in the backyard to keep the nosey neighbor’s guessing,” as well as news stories about the couple's disappearance. The most disturbing part is that the account has been sending twisted messages to Carver's friends. One read: "We [are] both ok. there is only one person that knows where we are… the person that means the most to me and kala she know where we are and we are coming that way for ever." There is mounting evidence that Carver's ex-wife was involved. According to a friend, Brown had said the woman was stalking them, and had been lurking around the apartment complex. Police have not identified her as a suspect, nor have they made it clear if they have issued a search warrant to Facebook, so they can locate the device logged into Carver's account. Head over to the Daily Beast to read Weill's full account of the story, including more of the unsettling messages on Carver's Facebook account. But lock the door first.
Good news for all the couples out there who want to cancel all their plans and stay home next weekend. A recent study says that binge-watching Netflix together may actually be helping your relationship. "Netflix and chill" is more than just a meme, my friends. For the study, published in the "Journal of Social and Personal Relationships," researchers asked 250 students in relationships to fill out questionnaires about their bond with their partner and their relationship habits. Upon analyzing the results, they found that watching TV shows and movies or reading books together can help couples feel more intimate and confident in their relationship. And it's not just because of all that extra cuddling. It's been known for quite some time that having mutual friends can help partners bond, but the study's lead author, Sarah Gomillion, PhD, told Health that if a couple doesn't share a social circle in their real lives, fictional characters might be a good substitute. “Having a shared connection to the characters in a TV series or film might make couples feel like they share a social identity even if they lack mutual friends in the real world,” Gomillion said. Binge-watching is often associated with loneliness, but Gomillion said that may not be the case. "People often say that activities like watching Netflix isolate us, but our research suggests that it can actually have important social benefits,” she told Health. So now you and bae have an excuse to stay home from that birthday party neither of you wanted to go to. You need to sit in front of the TV all weekend so you can bond.
According to the "Tampa Bay Times," around 200 people stormed out of Amy Schumer's standup show when she started "telling it like it is" about Donald Trump. The comedian/movie star/social media lightning rod started calling the Republican nominee an "orange, sexual-assaulting, fake- college-starting monster," and the Trump supporters so vehemently against political correctness just found it to be "too much." "I don't want to hear that. We wanted to have a good night without distractions with the politics," former audience member Bryon Nfinger told the paper."It's a bit much," his wife, Chrissy Nfinger, added. People took to Twitter to explain their shock that a comedian was talking about politics. At another point in her act, she started talking about sexual assault, which meant a lot to survivors, which many Trump-loving lightweights just couldn't handle. Other audience members tweeted their support for a comedian doing what a comedian does. Looks like these Trump supporters so triggered by opposing views need a safe space.
Disney, the greatest company to work for ever, has ceased sales of a full-body child's costume from their upcoming movie Moana amid accusations that it's racist. The costume depicts Maui, a Polynesian demigod who tags along with the movie's title character on her adventures. It consists of a skirt of leaves over a brown shirt and pants decorated with tattoos. Here it is in case I didn't describe it very good.
In a YouTube video, Chelsie Haunani Fairchild, a native Hawaiian who described herself as Polynesian, says the costume is an example of cultural appropriation, and asserts that kids shouldn't be allowed to wear the skin of someone from another race for amusement. A writer at Fusion characterized the costume as "full-body brown face." Disney apologized and issued a statement saying, "The team behind Moana has taken great care to respect the cultures of the Pacific Islands that inspired the film, and we regret that the Maui costume has offended some."
Speaking of Halloween consumes, there's some that I am just sick off already. Like this costume...
The goose that brought down Sully.
Don't char the edges of this a little and wear it trick-or-treating. This movie came out in September... but the bird will be sucked up into the jets of October through the power of mean-spirited ideas. This year there's less and less jack-o-lanterns and more and more Trumpkins. What is a Trumpkin you ask? Here's one...
Looks just like him. Speaking of Trump, this is from a German website...
Is Sexmonster a real word? I mentioned before that CNN's graphic department has been trolling Trump... well, the graphic department at MSNBC has been doing the same.
Did you see Hillary's impression of Monica Lewinsky?
Shit, what a blurry pic. Oh, well. Trump, meanwhile, has been entertaining his own people.
Hahaha. Over the years through my life people have made fun of my name... Peverett, calling me Pervert. Well, there's some very that have way less unfortunate names than I do.
See what I mean? I love Apple products, what was surprised at their new slogan.
Very true. I love jokes, and I always wondered what are the origins of some known jokes are. So, I did some research and now I have a pheature called...
What’s black and white and read/red all over? A newspaper. Or, if you’re a fourth grader, two zebras in a blender, two nuns in a chainsaw fight, etc. The origin goes back to the late 19th century, back when newspapers were still popular enough that they could be the punchline of a widespread joke. According to historian Mac Barrick in a 1974 report in "The Newspaper Riddle Joke," the riddle... playing off the similar pronunciation of red and read... appeared in 15 different folk riddle collections in the early 20th century. Which suggests that this dumb joke just kind of spread throughout the U.S. in the late 1800s.
If you spot the Mindphuck please let me know. And now from the home office in Port Jefferson, New York, here is this week's...
Top Phive Things In Ken Bone's Phifteen Minutes Of Phame
5. "Extra" reports Bone rushed to ER to treat severe rash from wearing same, unwashed sweater to every interview for three weeks straight.
4. Sales are disappointing for Kohls' new "Kenneth Bone Collection" of plus-sized cable-knit outerwear.
3. Appears on "Dancing With the Stars" and is eliminated in week two (just after Billy Bush).
2. Arrested while drunkenly screaming at traffic, wearing ONLY his trademark sweater.
And the number one thing in Bone's 15 minutes of fame is...
1. Completely forgotten when "Gerbil that looks like Ken Bone" becomes more Internet famous than him.
A former "Apprentice" contestant is the latest in a string of several women to come forward with sexual assault allegations against presidential nominee Donald Trump. At a press conference on Friday afternoon, Summer Zervos accused Trump of inappropriate sexual conduct in 2007, both at his office in New York City and then again a few days later at a hotel in Los Angeles. Zervos said that when she arrived at Trump's office to discuss job opportunities, he "kissed her on the lips" when she arrived and again when she left. She said it made her feel "nervous and embarrassed," but she brushed it off as a greeting. A few days later, Zervos met Trump at the Beverly Hills Hotel in Los Angeles, again for what she thought was a business-related meeting. Zervos was supposed to meet Trump for dinner, but upon arriving at the hotel was brought to a bungalow where she alleges that he kissed her "open-mouthed," touched her breasts, and led her to his bedroom despite her efforts to get away from him. Before Zervos told her story, her attorney Gloria Allred provided a statement in which she addressed Trump directly. "Donald, before you can become president of the United States, you must first learn how to treat women with respect," she said. I couldn't agree more.
Today's guest is one of my favorite female singers from recent times. Her latest album "Real" is available now on iTunes. Please welcome to the Phile... Lydia Loveless.
Me: Hello, Lydia, first of all, I think you are an amazing talent. Okay, I said it. How are you?
Lydia: Thank you, that is awesome to hear. I’m doing well.
Me: I love your new album "Real." That's your fourth album, right?
Lydia: Yessir.
Me: So, are you real?
Lydia: Nope, nobody is.
Me: Where are you from, Lydia ?
Lydia: I’m from Newcastle, Ohio, part of Coshocton County.
Me: Your dad owned a country music bar, right? Did you spent a lot of time there?
Lydia: It was not strictly country, I think a game of telephone started that, ha. But yeah, I would go there often; it was a restaurant too.
Me: Is that where you decided you wanted to be a musician?
Lydia: No, but it is where I probably decided I wanted to date a musician.
Me: How old were you when you first started to play guitar, sing and song write?
Lydia: I was 15.
Me: Is the bar still open? Why don't you go ahead and give it a plug?
Lydia: Nope, it closed when we moved. The restaurant part is still open, a Mexican place.
Me: You've been described as Patsy Cline, Loretta Lynn, Neko and Hank III, Lydia. What do you think of those comparisons?
Lydia: I’m inclined to think no one is as good as Patsy, but I’ll take it. I would hope a little Loretta rubbed off on me, and I have a foul mouth like Hank III I suppose.
Me: If you had to describe your music or influences who would you say?
Lydia: Hank III is a huge influence musically and lyrically, as well as Loretta Lynn, Richard Hell, Bob Dylan, Gin Blossoms and loads others. My music is rock n roll, I suppose.
Me: I read that you like booze, and making men cry. Hmmmm. what is the booze of your choice and how often do you make men cry?
Lydia: Hah! I guess I would say red wine. I’m not entirely sure I like making men cry, I just do, sometimes.
Me: How the hell do you make them cry anyway? Just wondering.
Lydia: I don’t do what they want. Maybe I just like cry babies?
Me: Then I'm the guy for you. Haha. Okay, let's talk about your music, Lydia. "The Only Man" was your first CD and "Real" is the latest. How would you compare both?
Lydia: Well, the first one is definitely more country. "Real" is raw and rockier.
Me: Who produced them and plays on them? The first one was produced by David Rhodes Brown, a Cinci musician, and Ted McConnell, a Cinci recording engineer. I produced the latest with the help of engineer Joe Viers.
Me: Did you do all the song writing on them both?
Lydia: Yessir.
Me: One of your older songs you did is called "Steve Earle." I am guessing you are a fan of his. Have you ever met him and do you know if he ever heard your song about him?
Lydia: Haha, yes. I have not met him, and I don’t think he has heard it, although I’m betting he will any day now.
Me: So, what's next for you? Hopefully you'll be heading down to Florida to play. Have you started writing songs for your next album?
Lydia: I’m sure I will make it down that way soon. I have written a few songs lately, but I’ve mostly been focused on the current one.
Me: Lydia, I am a really big fan so thanks for being on the Phile, and please come back again soon. Do you wanna plug your website?
Lydia: Thanks, no problem. I would recommend checking out Bloodshot Records or Reverb Nation/Facebook for more info, as the site is Lydialoveless.com.
Me: Thanks again, and take care.
Lydia: Thank you!
That's about it for this entry of the Phile. Thanks to Lydia for a great interview. I wish I could of interview her longer. The Phile will be back next Sunday with Emil from the band Emil & Friends. Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.
Not if it pleases me. No, you can't stop me, not if it pleases me. - Graham Parker
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