Thursday, February 28, 2008

Save A Dolphin Eat A Mermaid

Hello, welcome to the Phile, I am your host, Jason Peverett, star of the new movie The Slackerwick Chronicles. This is the most updated blog on the internet. Today at work I got my twenty year ring, so I guess I am now married to Disney World. Good news for everybody. Tuesday night was the final Democratic debate. I think there was 110 of those. Trouble for Barack Obama that night. He’s usually so smooth. He mispronounced the word Massachusetts twice, and then he mispronounced the word filibuster. Which explains why this morning Barack Obama was endorsed by President Bush. A photo has been circulating of Obama in a turban. This should actually help Obama with a key group of voters in New York: taxi drivers. In sports: The Florida Marlins have announced they will form an all-male, plus-size cheerleading squad. They will be called the Marlin Brandos. Not a great week for Britain. They had a 5.2 earthquake in Britain. Prince Charles said he knew it was coming . . . the horses were acting up. Especially Camilla. Sen. Larry Craig of Idaho is in the news again. Not only hasn’t he stepped down from his Senate seat, he’s actually looking for summer interns. He’s looking for juniors and seniors in college who have an interest in politics and know how to keep their mouths shut. The deadline is mid-March. If you’re interested, slip your resume under the third stall from the left in the Meridian’s men’s room off I-84. Did anybody see the Oscars? These may be the lowest ratings for the Academy Awards ever. They won’t know until the show ends. One good thing though, thanks to Diablo Cody, all the girls at the Doll House are writing screenplays on their laptops. Elton John had a party afterwards. Jack Nicholson was there and so was Jack Black. It was a pretty good hand: two jacks and a queen. Academy Awards is like a flight on Jet Blue. You sit there for six hours hoping it will take off. The statue, the Oscar, is 13 ½ inches tall, weighs 8 ½ pounds, and . . . no, that’s Tom Cruise. Here’s some champagne excitement: Ralph Nader is running for president. Ralph Nader looks like a guy who comes into town once a year for supplies. Starbucks has announced that they're introducing a coffee that costs only one dollar. Apparently the catch is you have to purchase it at Dunkin' Donuts. It was a tough Monday for America. From 5:30 to 8:30, every Starbucks was closed. It was terrible. For three full hours, people everywhere were forced to pay a reasonable amount for coffee. Fortunately, President Bush gave FEMA the go-ahead to tap into the nation’s mochaccino reserve. They closed the store to retrain the staff on the use of expresso machines. What happened? Starbucks released a statement that said, “We are understand that many of our loyal customers will be inconvenienced by the closings, but since they are all addicted to our products, we don’t care.” The Pentagon says it successfully shot down an old satellite over the Pacific Ocean. According to the Pentagon, this is the largest object to be shot down since Star Jones was fired by “The View.” Kirstie Alley is starting her own weight-loss company. Here’s how it works: You send her 30 bucks, and she comes to your house and stands next to you. 


Buddy Miles: Just another one of them changes, huh, Buddy?
William F. Buckley Jr.: As the world bids farewell to this emphysema-ridden blow-hard, we'd like to join his son Christopher in saying, "Thank you for smoking."


February 29: Leap Day...only happens once every four years.
March 9 (early AM): Spring Forward...Daylight Saving Time (where applicable)
March 16: Selection Sunday for NCAA Basketball Tourney (someone else is running the contest this year)
March 17: St. Patrick's Day for all those of Irish and fake Irish persuasion
March 20: Said NCAA tourney begins
March 23: Easter Sunday (second earliest day possible, last in 1913, next in 2228. Earliest is March 22, last in 1818, next in 2285)
April 1: April Fools Day

And now for another new pheature called...

A man who clung to his van as it was being carjacked was killed when the carjacker drove the vehicle into a concrete barrier on the Dan Ryan Expressway in an effort to shake him off, officials said. Eric Holmes, 26, whose address wasn't immediately available, was stopped at a gas station at 95th and State Streets about 5 p.m. Tuesday when a man jumped into his vehicle and drove off, officials said. Holmes grabbed onto the luggage rack and got onto the roof as the van entered the expressway and headed north, according to officials. A witness told police he apparently tried to get into the van through the passenger door. He was then thrown off the van when the carjacker ran him into the barrier at 89th Street. The van also crashed and caught on fire. A 31-year-old suspect was in custody. Holmes was pronounced dead at Stroger Hospital at 5:54 p.m., according to the Cook County medical examiner's office. It's a freakin car---dumbass!


Two impenitent heretics are burned at the stake in Mexico at a spectacular auto-da-fe comparable to those in Spain. The two are the first victims of the Inquisition in the New World, dying for their heretical crimes of... Lutheranism.
Singer and early 60's heartthrob Frankie Lymon is found dead from a heroin overdose next to his syringe, in his grandmother's New York City apartment.
Prime Minister of Sweden Olof Palme assassinated as he left a movie theater in Stockholm. It is unknown who the assailant was, though some suspect a South African death squad.
Agents of the Bureau of Alcohol, Firearms and Tobacco use armed force attempting to serve Branch Davidian leader David Koresh with a search warrant (one with no actual evidence of any illegal activity whatsoever), in what the BATF viewed as a publicity stunt to improve their image. While the agents carefully coordinated the raid with eleven different media outlets, something apparently tipped off Koresh and things do not go well: six Davidians and four ATF agents were killed. The warrant instead could have been served peacefully, while Koresh did his daily morning jog.
Members of the group "Patriot's Council" in Minnesota are convicted under the Biological Weapons Anti-Terrorism Act of 1989, for manufacturing quantities of the ricin toxin. The substance is nearly indetectible when used as a poison, but is difficult to administer.


A man walks into his doctor’s office after havingtaken several tests to learn the results. The doctor asks the man to sit down. “I have some bad news for you, Mr. Phillips. I am afraid that you have cancer and Alzheimer’s disease.” The man replies, “Well, at least I don’t have cancer.”

So, the other day someone said to me, "Why aren't you talking about American Idol on the Phile? You talk about other reality shows, and Idol is the number one show. Well, I do watch Idol, so I might as well talk about it, right? So...

It's that time of year again. The time when American Idol settles down with it's Top 24, I start singling out our favorites, and the media starts digging into these people's pasts and presents looking for juicy secrets like they're presidential politicians, too. Other than the expected mug shot discovery, two have surfaced this week that are certainly generating a lot of buzz. One features Robbie Carrico, who has been called out as inauthentic in his attempts to be a "rocker" week after week thus far on the show. The other, the handsome but otherwise dull David H., who had a great week. Of course, Idol and FOX aren't saying anything about it. In order to not spoil the fun for those who like to avoid this kind of thing, you'll have to follow me to know more.
If this rumor is right, than Simon is absolutely right in calling Robbie out as a fake. And if Simon knows, as it is hinted that most of the Idol staffers know, then it makes sense why he keeps drilling it in. According to TMZ, Robbie Carrico wears a wig. Now, this is one of those things that's easy to just laugh off; after all I thought David Cook's hair looked decided wiggish on this week's performance show, especially when they zoomed in on a side shot of his head. And I could totally picture him with male pattern baldness. The thing is, as Chris Daughtry proved, you don't need long luxurious locks to look like a rocker. Maybe to squelch these rumors he'll get an impromptu "haircut" and explain it away as he was trying to get a makeover. Of course, if he does have severe baldness, then he'd better shave it pretty close because those HD TVs don't miss much. Robbie's pretty popular with viewers right now, so it'll be interesting to see if this story has any impact on that. Or if it will be addressed directly on the show. The next rumor that I guarantee won't be addressed on the show is the apparently secret past of David Hernandez. As first rumored on, apparently David Hernandez was a gay stripper at a club called Dick's Cabaret. Now, David also has apparently been calling out for the "single ladies" in at least one local news interview, so clearly he's either bisexual or now hiding his homosexuality for some reason. Since they first posted the story, VFTW has been getting hit with various posts confirming his presence and expounding on the story with similar details among various posters. Purportedly, his stage name was Caden and he danced there and other places with his boyfriend. You can check out various pictures (SFW) of David working in the bar at their site. As for that mugshot, well it looks like everyone's favorite rocker Amanda Overmyer got a DUI in October 2006. The article goes on to say she has a string of vehicular offenses, including going 100mph in a 45mph zone and running a red light. Generally, traffic tickets aren't anything to get too worked up, but a DUI is always a serious thing and exceeding the speed limit by 55 mph is pretty serious business, too. One can only hope that Amanda has learned from her mistakes and won't be repeating them. And, as crass as it is to say, this kind of story can only improve her "bad girl" rocker image, if that's what she's wanting to do. The bottom line is these contestants are people, too. They've lived lives and made bad choices and mistakes just like the rest of us. We just don't have anyone digging into our pasts trying to find them. Welcome to stardom, kids!


Of course, my name being David also, I had an instant connection with the guitar player that my friend Tom Brennan took me to see in August of 1974 at the Spectrum in Philadelphia, PA. I had purchased my first Foghat album earlier that year. I believe they were the opening act for Black Oak Arkansas for that event. See, back then things were a little "foggy" when we attended concerts, if you know what I mean! But I was hooked on the song "Eight Days on the Road" and would have paid any price for a concert ticket just to hear that one song! Unfortunately, I think I straightened up long enough to hear Lonesome pound out the best version of that song I think I will ever here! During this era I began to follow a lot of local bands in my area, a few of which my friends and I played in. So, my first Foghat experience was 1974 at age 15 if you can believe that! Saw the band again in Dec. 1975 when they released "Fool for the City" album which was an instant hit with my friends and myself. So this time we got right in front of the stage at the Spectrum, and we were standing right in front of "Dave"! That was the concert which was most memorable to me! During the later part of the seventies I didn't follow the concert schedule as much, I began following a band out of New York, Bonnie Parker Band, whom I got to know very well, and now my buddy R. Scarlet who played guitar for them is now a pretty famous rocker on his own! Early in 1980 though, I managed to get a hold of two tickets to see Foghat & The Outlaws at the Spectrum and took my friend Craig. Little did I know then this would be the "last" time that I would see Lonesome Dave & Rod "The Bottle" Price perform! During the late 1980's and early 1990's I tried to get news of Foghat performances in the South Jersey area, but did manage to see Roger Earl with different musicians being billed as "Foghat" perform at two different clubs in the Berlin, N.J. and Deptford, N.J. area! After this did not hear about any Foghat shows anywhere even though I tried to hear of any performances there was no news of them! Sadly, after being unemployed in early 2007, I happened on the website only to have my heart broken learning about the news about Dave & Rod! But in August 2007, some friends of mine had won a contest on a Phila. radio station, and when I heard the legendary Foghat would perform I got "goosebumps"! So on a humid Sunday afternoon I stood transfixed watching them prepare the stage at Mike & Joanies house and when John DiBella introduced them I can promise you my eyes welled up, as they are doing right now when they began to play "Home in my Hand"! I began to cheer just like I did when I sixteen! But, I can promise you there is no voice of any Rock & Roll band that can match that "hauntingly" unmistakable voice of "Lonesome" Dave's! I can pick his voice out of any crowd, anywhere at anytime! Virtually Awesome! You wanted my story about Dave and that's about it! I did manage to purchase the DVD , "Two Centuries of Boogie" for my collection! And you know that that will never leave my house! And Dave & Rod are always in my thought and prayers! A Foghat fan then and forever, one of your loyal and honorable fans! Sincerely, David J DiLullo.


And away we go ... Three new stills from the upcoming direct-to-DVD prequel Batman: Gotham Knights have been released online (via Kung Fu Rodeo), and they once again show a ripped Batman looking all pissed off at something or someone. The new stills don't look much different from the three that were released earlier in the week, so I'm not sure if they are all from the same mini-story or different. I do notice subtle changes, but does it matter? I just want to watch this thing now. Set for release on July 8, the disc will feature six interlocking stories that will serve as a bridge between the two live-action films, Batman Begins and The Dark Knight. Villains rumored to be appearing include Scarecrow, Killer Croc and Deathstroke. (Additionally, a Deathstroke toy is floating around somewhere, so either it's a tie-in to the DVD, or we could be looking at another possible villain for Dark Knight and beyond.)  Now, to Star Wars! So we already know George Lucas is planning a 100-episode live-action TV show set between Episodes III and IV. Last we heard, the scripts were being written and most of the talk surrounded the Star Wars animated series debuting this fall. Well, The tells us (via Liverpool Daily Post) that Jim Marquand has been asked by Lucas to direct episodes of the live-action show. Who is Jim Marquand, you ask? Well, he just happens to be the son of Richard Marquand, director of Return of the Jedi. Pretty cool stuff -- we'll have to see how he does. I wonder if Lucas will direct an episode or two himself?


A Nightmare on Elm Street
Michael Rosenbaum, who stars as bald villain Lex Luthor on Smallville, has been seen lunching with Michael Bay in L.A., leading some fans to speculate he's up for the role of serial slasher Freddy Krueger in Bay's remake. Either that or the guy's going to star as a new Transformer: Chrome Dome.
Zack & Miri Make a Porno
Kevin Smith has made a new viral parody video (So NSFW) in which his lead actress, Elizabeth Banks, sings about having to do it with co-star Seth Rogen so she can get ahead in the business and work with Judd Apatow. Could be worse. She could be doin' it with McLovin.
The X-Files 2
A bootleg Wonder-Con trailer was up all weekend that 20th Century Fox eventually had taken down, and all we got to see in it was a wild-haired Billy Connolly leading Gillian Anderson and a crew of FBI agents digging in a snow bank, where they find something shocking. Dunno what it is, but they must have found the yellow spot.
Justice League of America
The troubled superhero-team-up flick may now be shot in Canada if Warner Bros. can't get a tax break from Australia, where the movie was originally going to be filmed. Director George Miller's subsequent film, Happy Feet 2, might also have to move production to the Great White North, too. If WB wants to save money, why don't they just combine both films. I'd love to see a tap dancing Aquaman and Wonder Woman.
The Bourne Identity 4
Although both Matt Damon and director Paul Greengrass seemed to indicate that The Bourne Ultimatum would be the last, the pair have signed for a fourth outing. Now that Bourne has his memory back, the new film will have him remembering where to go find his car at the mall parking garage.
Where in the World Is Osama Bin Laden?
The first poster for Morgan Spurlock's new documentary is a clever spoof of the original one for Raiders of the Lost Ark. Maybe that's why we can't find the guy. Maybe his face got melted off like that Nazi's, and nobody recognizes him anymore.
So far, not much is known about James Cameron's latest alien epic, but star Sigourney Weaver says it's about ecology, love and greed and that fans will love it so much they'll want to bring sleeping bags and camp out in theaters. I did that for Titanic, but that was so I could nap.
The Fall
Visionary director Tarsem Singh (The Cell) has crafted this surreal trailer that features Charles Darwin as a superhero who must defeat the sinister General Odious. The trailer doesn't disclose Odious' evil plans, but I'm guessing it has something to do with removing all references to evolution in science classes.

Now, last week I forgot to post the review of The Jumper
, so here it is:
Starring Hayden Christensen, Rachel Bilson, Jamie Bell, Samuel L. Jackson, and Diane Lane. The most boring man alive discovers he has the ability to teleport through space to wherever he wants to go — "Did I just teleport?" he asks himself the first time it happens. When he robs some banks for funding along the way? No big deal. But then Samuel L. with a white afro shows up as a "paladin," whose job is to stalk and kill jumpers. He keeps yelling, "ONLY GOD SHOULD HAVE THIS POWER!" while trying to eliminate the most boring man alive. And you're sort of rooting for Sam … This would have been a perfect piece of junk entertainment if they had only managed to steer clear of the acting pothole that is Christensen. Seriously, is it possible for an actor to have a negative amount of charisma? He makes you wish Stanley Kubrick were alive still and had cast him in the Keir Dullea blank-faced astronaut role in 2001: A Space Odyssey. As it is, you only wake up when now grown-up Billy Elliot star Bell comes along to be all swaggery and interesting. If this had been a smarter movie, Lane would have had more than five minutes of stunt-casting screen time. For as much as she had to do here, they could have let Heidi Klum play the part for a lot less money. Lane's character's meaty moral conflict — she's a paladin, too, just like Jackson — could have become a metaphor for a whole lot of other stuff and not sacrificed the action. It could have been a potentially heartbreaking storyline. And it just lies there like a wad of barely chewed gum on the sidewalk. You can spend the first 30 minutes of this film eating one of everything at the concession and then checking your e-mail in the lobby. All he does is jump around from place to place. After that, the chasing and the fighting starts, and the movie starts to be fun. Then you'll almost forget you've just paid money to see more of young Anakin.

Well, there you have it, phans, a new entry with some new pheatures. Keeping it
phresh, you know. We are less then 200 views from hitting 4000 by Easter, so tell 
your friends to check the Phile out. Not much is hapepning in the Peverett household
this weekend, but next weekend is the Disney Bowl-A-Thon I will be taking part in, 
as well as Megacon. Then on March 15th is the Hootie and the Blowfish free concert
at Celebration, not far from where I live. As always, check out for updates and pictures and to buy some cool Foghat merch. 
Until March, spread the word, not the turd. Peace. 

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