Pheaturing Ricky Gervais

 

Hey, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Thursday. How are you doing? In case you're in the mood to remember you're not rich today, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos just got back from a ten minute joy ride to space. Normal people go to Disney World's spinning teacup ride when they need a reminder that it's a small world, but billionaires can apparently fully fund little space missions for themselves that launch them off the planet Earth and back. In an objectively phallic spacecraft Bezos, his brother Mark, 82-year-old aviation pilot Mary "Wally" Funk, and teen physics student, Oliver Daeman, embarked on their trip to view Earth as a tiny blue marble at 9:12 a.m. on July 20th. We can only assume Bezos provided his guests with an in-flight snack spread of freshly printed hundred dollar bills and diamond-encrusted golden nuggets of caviar-infused champagne to chomp on while cackling into the stars. The Billionaire Bezos space jaunt is remarkable as Mary Funk (now the oldest person to go to space) endured rigorous astronaut training in the sixties only to be denied along with her fellow female peers. At 18-years-old, Daeman is now the youngest person to enter space after he won the 28 million dollar seat by bidding for it at an auction. Say what you will about Gen Z, but they're not just dancing on TikTok and complaining about Millennials being "Cheugy," some of them are hitching a first class ride out of Earth. 

Jeff Bezos spent 10 minutes in a spaceship Tuesday and he's really excited about it. So excited, in fact, that he spoke honestly about the fact that Amazon customers and employees "paid for" the flight. The billionaire made the statement on camera at a press conference after the flight, and those around him laughed at what he said. Bezos doesn't have the best track record for granting rights to its workers or even just letting them use the bathroom during shifts. So the statement rubbed a lot of people who weren't at the press conference the wrong way. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez weighed in early...

Mostly, people can't believe he actually said this out loud. And pointed to his union-busting past as a reason why he was able to fund this trip. 

Tom Brady, the football player everyone knows even if they don't know football players, visited the White House with his fellow Tampa Bay Buccaneers to celebrate their Super Bowl win. Brady once golfed with Trump, and has long been the former president's man crush. For decades, Trump venerated Brady as the ultimate male specimen, trying to set him up with his daughter Ivanka so they would breed a "power dynasty." Trump described Brady as one of his "great friends" and was reportedly very angry when Brady skipped the White House visit after his win with the New England Patriots in 2017... so angry that he screamed at the team's owner, Robert Kraft. Trump is likely to be even angrier when he sees that Brady finally made it to the White House, and made jokes at his expense. The quarterback mocked Trump's election lie, joking that "40% of the people still don't think we won." Thank goodness that Kansas City Chiefs fans didn't launch an insurrection. Brady also riffed on Trump's nickname for Biden, "Sleepy Joe," joking that he was called "Sleepy Tom." Brady: “We had a game in Chicago where I forgot what down it was. I lost track of one down in 21 years of playing and they started calling me Sleepy Tom. Why would they do that to me?” Liberals and other anti-Trumpers rejoiced at this moment that likely became the worst moment in Donald Trump's life: worse than his two impeachments, hospital stay, and Eric's birth combined. It’s only a matter of time before Trump turns on Brady. That’ll be another rare clash in which I’ll be rooting for Brady.

Megyn Kelly is in the eye of an Internet storm once again after taking a shot at the tennis player Naomi Osaka on Twitter. The confrontation started when Conservative commentator Clay Travis accused Osaka of not being genuine about her mental health problems (referencing her decision to drop out of the French Open). Kelly was quick to add to the accusations by bringing up recent magazines that came out featuring Osaka. It wasn't long before Osaka responded by pointing out that all of her magazine covers were shot a year ago, long before she opened to the public up about her mental health. She wrote, "Seeing as you're a journalist I would've assumed you would take the time to research what the lead times are for magazines, if you did that you would've found out I shot all my covers last year. Instead your first reaction is to top on here and spew negativity, do better Megan." Shortly after that, Osaka blocked Kelly on Twitter. Staying true to her brand, Kelly didn't let the exchange go, and instead decided to double down after being blocked. Kelly's follow-up tweet prompted a back-and-forth with Czech American former tennis player Martina Navratilova, who came to Osaka's defense. Unsurprisingly, Kelly's stream of tweets inspired a lot of responses from the general public. Some people were straight-up roasting her for spending so much time picking fights on Twitter. While others pointed out the hypocrisy of her not calling out her Conservative colleagues for blocking people while claiming Osaka isn't "tough" for the same behavior. Others focused more on the racial dynamics of Kelly obsessively targeting Osaka. At the time of writing this, no one from Osaka's camp has further engaged with Kelly, so hopefully her harassment campaign comes to an end. 

I think we can all agree that if there's one actor synonymous with the Star Wars franchise, it has got to be Mark Hamill. The Hollywood legend has been part of the Star Wars universe since its inception in the 1970s and even after Luke Skywalker died in The Last Jedi, Hamill has made appearances in other projects under the Lucasfilm banner. But did you know that he's been pulling double duty since the sequel trilogy started? Apparently, Hamill has been doing "secret" voice cameos since 2015 most fans aren't aware of. Mark revealed the jaw-dropping bit when a fan pointed out on Twitter that he voiced the droid EV-9D9 in "The Mandalorian." According to Hamill himself, he's done secret voice cameos for all Star Wars films that have come out in the Disney era so far... from the sequel trilogy, Rogue One, and Solo. You truly learn something new every day. As for Mark's future in the franchise, while it's evident that the Mandoverse has plans of revisiting Luke Skywalker's story in upcoming seasons of "The Mandalorian" and potentially, his own solo spinoff show, Lucasfilm will most likely cast a new actor to play the Jedi Master but doesn't mean there's no way for Hamill to get involved. Now that we know that he's been secretly lending his voice in various Star Wars projects, I expect Disney to continue the tradition in future projects. I'd also be down with him returning as a Force ghost in a future Star Wars trilogy set years after the Skywalker saga. I think that would be great.

So, if you didn't see Bezo's rocket launch, here it is...

Hahaha. Hey, future kids, this is Jeff Bezos...

You heard of Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, right? But have you heard of Dwayne "The Loch" Johnson? No? Look...

Hahahahaha. So, ever watch that "Antiques Roadshow" TV show? You never know what they're gonna have on there...

Hahahahaha. Any stroll through a store would have you believe that "pink is for girls" and "blue is for boys" are the associated gender roles are the very backbone of our society. Products from nail clippers to hand lotion are assigned genders when last time I checked, inanimate objects don't have gender identities. Like these acne patches for some reason...

Because only girls like stars. Different families have different ways of showing affection. And sometimes, this can cause friction in relationships. A woman recently emailed the Phile to ask for advice after feeling like her boyfriend and his sister might be a little too close, because of the way he hugs her. The plot twist: she's going through a really hard time. So is this girlfriend right to be concerned, or is her boyfriend just a really good brother? The woman explains the crappy circumstances surrounding her boyfriend's sister...

"My boyfriend's sister had her first kid quite young at 21. Her daughter is now 5 and has developed a cancerous brain tumor. Her fiancé and the baby daddy un-fiancéd her ( I don't know the proper term because I don't think break up works here). It's obviously all been really hard on her so my boyfriends been comforting her but I don't like that he cuddles her. So how does he cuddle her? Like she'll hug him he will put his arm around her and stroke her back or something and she'll just cry into his chest. I'm not jealous because he cuddles a lot with me as well but I just think it's weird. I understand that it is his sister and she is going through a hard time, but I still thought it was weird and felt a little uncomfortable. So I went and talked to him about it and said it made me uncomfortable. He said that's my sister and I'm just trying to help her. I said that it still makes me uncomfortable. He asked me what I want him to do. I said just don't cuddle her give her support in other ways. He said that it was a good way of giving support and it helped her and that I need to calm down so I said fine and left it at that. At first, I thought he was being stubborn but now that I've thought about it more I think he may be right and I probably should calm down and try to help him instead of bothering him like this." Some people need physical comfort. That’s his sister and she’s going through something unimaginable. Imagine crying about your child's brain tumor on your brother's shoulder and having him push you away and pat your head. I thought they were gonna be spooning or something based on your subject title, but that just sounds like a good hug. He sounds like a good brother to be honest. It'd be one thing if they were in their underwear and spooning or some shit. They aren't. Your boyfriend is hugging her and stroking her hair/back. That's normal. So there you have it. If your sibling's child is diagnosed with a brain tumor, it's okay to hug them and rub their back. In case anyone was wondering. If you have a problem you'd like my opinion on then email me at thepeverettphile@gmail.com. Now from the home office in Port Jefferson, New York, here is...

Top Phive Things Said About Jeff Bezos' Ten Minute Space Trip

5. Jeff Bezos spent $5.5 billion and more than twenty years so that he can briefly travel to space. MacKenzie Scott gave away $8 billion in less than a year to change other people’s lives forever. 

4. How many Amazon workers are going to have to pee in a bottle today? How many are going to have to go to a second job to put food on the table? But hey, at least Jeff Bezos is almost going into space. LOL.

3. Jeff Bezos rocket looking like a giant dildo was perfect. 

2. Just to properly frame it, Jeff Bezos used your money and money that should’ve gone to build schools and roads and public housing and provide healthcare and support small businesses to blast himself into “near space” and enjoy days of uncritical media fawning. 

And the number one thing said about Bezos' ten minute space trip was...

1. If you had to pay a tax to re-enter the Earth's atmosphere we would never see Jeff Bezos again. 

If you spot the Mindphuck let me know. Hey, it's Thursday, you know what that means...

Yuck! Okay, let's take a live look at Port Jefferson, shall we?

Looks like a nice day. 

The 154th book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club is...

Sharon will be on the Phile next Friday. I know I said on Monday but nope... on Friday next week. 

Phact 1. Anorexia has the highest mortality rate of any mental illness. Between 5% and 20% of people who suffer from the disease eventually die from it. 

Phact 2. There’s a man who turned his dead cat into a drone; then did the same to an ostrich, a shark, a rat, and more. 

Phact 3. Cabin in the Woods was supposed to have a Left 4 Dead level based on the movie sets, but was canceled. In spite of this, Boomer appears in the movie. 

Phact 4. In Kazakhstan, there is a town where people suddenly started falling asleep for 5 days or longer. 

Phact 5. Dolphins give each other names and will answer to it even when called by dolphins they don’t know.

I'm so excited about this... today's guest is an English actor, comedian, director, producer and writer. He is best known for co-creating, co-writing and acting in the British television mockumentary sitcom "The Office." Currently, Gervais is credited as the creator, executive producer, director, and writer for the Netflix comedy series "After Life," where he plays the lead role of Tony Johnson. Please welcome to the Phile... Ricky Gervais!

Me: Ricky, welcome to the Phile! I'm a huge fan and so excited you are here. How are you?

Ricky: I'm doing good. I'm glad to be here. The 1918 pandemic must've been awful. 

Me: I love your live videos you've dome during the pandemic. What do you like doing about them? 

Ricky: Well, it started off as a bit of a joke. I thought it would be fun to connect with fans on Twitter. I did it live and I pretended I was Winston Churchill during the war. It soon generated into the worst entertainment in the world. I don't know why people tune in. I asked once, "why are you watching this?" It's awful, but it gets many hits because it's TV. They're just seeing a fat drunk bloke complains about how awful this thing is that he's doing. It's very weird. It's very meta. 

Me: It's you and it's funny. I love "After Life," sir. Tell the readers what it's about. 

Ricky: It's dark comedy-drama follows newspaper journalist Tony, whose life is upended after his wife dies from cancer. 

Me: So, not the most happiest of stories, it seems like an unlikely show. When you first started making it and coming up with the premise were you confident in it? 

Ricky: I think everything I've done is an unlikely show. If I just sent the script off of "The Office" saying I'm a nobody, I'm going to play the lead character, he says unfunny things that no one laughs at, he looks at the camera... that doesn't jump off the page. You have to see it. "Derek"! Imagine me describing "Derek" to people. I play a guy who shuffles around in an old people's home. People go "really"? You're going to try and sell this? The thing unlikely about it it's the most dramatic I've gone which is always dangerous for a comedian I think. But more that because it was a comedy, and it still is, I still call it a sit-com I was worried could people properly be laughing at something and then crying and then laughing again? That's the only thing, that was the tricky but, how could I do that and not make it like two completely different shows? The answer is I just make it realistic. I just do it naturalistically because that's life. You're laughing and then you get a terrible email. People are smarter than we think, we keep second guessing people. We do it as broadcasters and creators and studios. We say can people take this and we water it down in case and that's ludicrous. 

Me: Why do you think that is, Ricky? 

Ricky: If we think can they take that sort of language, can they take that about death? Yes! Because they're going through that in real life. Real life is worse. So we sort of create our own real life heroes and villains in fiction as role playing for the soul. People enjoy it, they go through all these things and they actually laugh and they actually cry and in the end they feel better because in the end no one really got hurt. It's almost an inoculation to real life. I think I go really head first into taboo subjects because I think no harm can from discussing them. I face these things head on and if we can laugh at the face of adversity we're bullet proof. 

Me: With me it's a touchy subject as both of my parents passed away from cancer. How does this show compare to other shows that talk about grief? 

Ricky: Often the media wants us to perceive grief as this one color, they are very, very sad, and they are very, very sad all the time, but there's a beauty and a resilience in the sadness. But often they ignore that and they are sad and it doesn't go away and it hurts all the time. Sometimes they laugh and joke about the saddest thing about death and their friend who had died. Sometimes they find themselves laughing. 

Me: So, how did you get it so right, how people actually experience grief? 

Ricky: Firstly I think a lot of aspects of of nature aren't treated of the complexity they deserve. I think it's not just through grief, they do it with villains with a twirly mustache, they have no redeeming features, they never do anything nice, they're always in the wrong. The truth is that bad people do good things and good people do bad things and we don't know which is which. Bad people sometimes keep it to themselves. Good people go out of their way to be honest. So all aspects of humanity is very, very complex and sometimes they are not treated like that in fiction because again they want to water it down. They don't want people to be confused by who's the villain and who's not like in real life. 

Me: Do you think they also think that if you're going through grief you shouldn't laugh? 

Ricky: Exactly. And sometimes we got to get on with stuff. Like now, it's fine to be in touch with our emotions, it's fine to stay we are depressed and get help. It's fine to talk about it. We've made it as a society that is more caring and we get it out in the open and it's good to talk. 

Me: Do you think people are different now than when we were growing up? 

Ricky: When I was growing up I didn't know a grown man who would say, "I'm depressed." I wonder how many times when we saw working class men, labourers like my dad just get drunk and go to bed? How many of those were depressed? But couldn't say it or didn't know it. 

Me: So, how does your character Tony handle his wife's death? 

Ricky: It's really hard and Tony is really confused, he doesn't know what to do. He's angry, he's sad and he doesn't get to say that much. So it's great when he talks to Penelope Wilton's character Anne. It's about the comfort of strangers and he feels can say what's true in it. There's a scene in episode 4 of the second season where he breaks down and says, "I'm broken, I lost all of me when Lisa died, all the good stuff." Its really sad and the most poignant thing he says is, "People think I'm getting better, getting on with it, because I'm snarky sometimes. I think that's the real me, and this is not, but it's not, this is me all the time. I remember what it's like to eb normal so I do an impression of that." He's so conflicted, he doesn't know how to act. He's going throng the seven stages of grief and we started off, we hit the ground running with Season 1 where he was going through shock, anger, denial, and now he's going through negotiation, he's saying if Im not going to kill myself... why? What's in it for me? What is there to stay around for? It asks the big question, both the series asks the big question, if you lose everything is it still worth living? That's the central theme, it's like a study, it's like a cheque list for what's worth living for really. 

Me: I like the old lady who can't stop swearing. What's the deal with that? Hahah. 

Ricky: There's a scene where this old lady turns a 100, you've seen it a lot in the paper, when they say what's your secret on living a long life they say just have a cup a tea a day. I thought just once I want to say don't, because it's awful. And she does this... she hates being alive, she's in pain all the time. And when you add to that the actress who plays that is an absolute national treasure in England, she's like our Betty White, Annette Crosbie, for her to be saying so many c-bombs in the first episode... Ha ha ha ha ha. 

Me: That's funny, Ricky, you do write and create good characters. I wrote two novel's and I enjoyed writing characters as well. 

Ricky: Yeah, I'm with her. I love people who are honest. Again I love that brutal honesty. I do like it that we get old people's rights. My mum was always pretty honest to me but she'd say to me things like, "Rick, you're getting fat." And I'll go, "Cheers." And I'd laugh. I've got older brothers and sisters, they're eleven years older than me, twelve years older than me, fourteen years older than me and I remember when I was thirteen I said, "Mum, why are my brothers and sisters much older than me?" And she went, "You were a mistake." Right? Honesty is funny, honesty is funny. 

Me: You have put leading women in characters who work in old age old people's homes before. Why is that? 

Ricky: I've always seen women as sort of leaders really. I was the fourth child of an immigrant labourer from Canada. My dad was from London, Ontario, he volunteered for the war, came over, met my mum, got her pregnant and I came along like in 1961. We had no one, we was a labourer all his life, worked on building sites and odd jobs until he was seventy. My mum was a homemaker and again had odd jobs but men worked hard, women worked miracles. 

Me: I agree, my mom was amazing, but why do you say that? 

Ricky: Because when my dad finished work his time was his own. My mum carried on, she never stopped, she couldn't stop. She had kept everything together, she could do anything. She would plant vegetables so we wouldn't go hungry, she would make clothes, she would sew, knit, wallpaper. She would do everything and she gave me everything I needed. Except money. I learned from that that the best things were free. Learning, it was free, Nature, free. Friends, they were free. Healthcare, it was free. I always thought of women they did everything, they were lionesses. They were protectors, they were nurturers, teachers, they were everything. Most of the women in my family worked with some sort of care. My mum fostered, my sister teachers learning disabled kids, my sister-in-law, two of her kids, two of my nieces work in care homes, so I always had that around me growing up. That's why I knew about "Derek." The best thing that came out of the pandemic is we saw the true heroes were nurses and care workers, and I hope people never forget that. 

Me: I haven't seen "Derek," but I heard good things about that show. I was a big fan of "The Office" and "Extras" though. How do you compare all your characters? 

Ricky: I always thought there was pathos in this stuff, is I usually played the absolute buffoon. Even David Brent was a buffon. Even that I the end, I wanted people to realise that David Brent was a bit wounded actually and needed a hug. He's been sold this bad bill. His big error was he mistook popularity with respect, he thought if I could be popular I could be respected. He was insecure and he just wanted to be loved. So really David Brent did have a heart, he just didn't know how to do it. That was about fame, how people just think how they could take a shortcut to feeling happy. Everything I've done is about humanity, and everything I've done is about being happy. Everything I've done is existential to some extent about... am I leading a good life? Am I doing it right? Am I getting the most out of it? And all the problems we have, all the fears, all the time we waste worrying about that. I'm an optimist and basically people are good. There's a saying, there are no bad dogs, just bad owners. If we treat a dog badly with cruelty, it'll be nasty, because it's in fear. I think it's the same with people. I think we make villains, we create villains. I think basically we're good. we built our whole civilization on empathy. Around the camp fire, caring about people, worrying about our tribe, telling stories, all these things haven't changed, all this technology has moved so much faster with the evolution but its still the same as we were two hundred thousand years ago, when we were scrambling around. We've got the same brain. You bring back a hunter gatherer, shave him, put a suit on and he could be a computer programmer. We're the same. 

Me: I disagree, people will comment not so nice things, I mean, look at Trump... the Internet as well brings out the worse in people. So, what changed? 

Ricky: I think people started to get rewarded in my life time. There's a line in "After Life" when Tony says, "When did it start that people would rather be famous for being shit rather than not be famous at all?" The answer is when we all started to be rewarded for it. Reality TV, clickbait, now you've got trolls who get their own shows because they said something really nasty and they're invited on the show because people will tune in. It's crazy and social media just amplified this narcism. Given the chance, even the cavemen that I talked about, they'd put their hand on the cave wall and blow around it going I was here. Everyone os going "I was here." Now we've got the Internet which is like reading every toilet wall in the world at once and everyone is just shouting out the window. The problem is there is no difference now between fame and infamy. Bad behaviour is rewarded the same as good behaviour. So kids grow up thinking why do I want to be a doctor when I can just take my clothes off? 

Me: I have to say that I love what you say about animals and dogs online, you live animals, right? 

Ricky: I think dogs are amazing, in fact all animals are unconditionally perfect and beautiful. But one relationship with the dog is something special. They guard us, they guide us, they smell cancer. We should be giving awards to dogs every year. Not actors. They get paid for doing their jobs. We should be giving medals to dogs and nurses and that that's what should change if anything. 

Me: Ricky, thanks so much for being on the Phile. 

Ricky: Cheers. My pleasure.

That about does it for this entry of the Phile. Thanks to Ricky Gervais for a great interview. The Phile will be back next Friday with Sharon Stone. Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye. 

Give me some rope, tie me to dream, give me the hope to run out of steam, somebody said it could be here. We could be roped up, tied up, dead in a year. I can't count the reasons I should stay. One by one they all just fade away...