Monday, March 9, 2015

Pheaturing Jeff R. Trelewicz

Hey there, and welcome to the Phile. How are you doing?  Senator Ted Cruz... who criticized Barack Obama last year when the President refused to prosecute pot growers in Colorado has apparently changed his mind and now supports states' rights to legalize marijuana. While speaking at CPAC earlier this week, Cruz offered, "If the citizens of Colorado decide they want to go down that road, that's their prerogative." This would mark the first reasonable position held by the Texas legislator, and it's probably making a lot of marijuana supporters wonder if they might have something wrong somehow. Here's how to win the war on drugs... 1) legalize all drugs. 2) require that all drugs be purchased through Brighthouse customer service.  More than 300 Republican leaders have signed a letter asking the Supreme Court to support same-sex marriage in its upcoming historic decision. Among those who have signed the letter are Rudy Giuliani, David Koch and several tops aides to Mitt Romney in his 2012 presidential campaign. "One of the points that I hope people appreciate when they read the brief is that supporting marriage equality is, in fact, the conservative position," explained organizer Ken Mehlman, who helped propel George W. Bush into the White House by appealing to Americans' homophobia. It's the beginning of the "Uh, yeah, well, Republicans actually were always for same-sex marriage" alibi.  One week after ISIS released footage of its members destroying 3,000-year-old artworks in an Iraqi museum, we are now learning that the extremist organization is literally bulldozing its way through the ancient Assyrian city of Nimrud, because they apparently worship a god who is as disdainful of priceless historic artifacts as any nine year old. Allstar Marketing Group... the makers of that ridiculous Snuggie have been fined $8 million dollars for years of false advertising. While I'm not particularly upset with the ruling, I have to admit that I kind of feel like they did a pretty great job of representing their product as something I would never want anywhere near my person. Snuggie: The blanket that understands your depression. Hmmm. Maybe I will get one after all.  Two out of three people who smoke cigarettes will ultimately die from conditions associated with their habit, according to the National Centre for Epidemiology and Population Health at the Australian National University. The figure gets even higher if you consider the fact that rising tobacco prices means that smokers are often forced to choose between buying a pack of cigarettes and paying rent to protect themselves from the elements.  A new survey of 15,000 penises... conducted by some British researchers who will probably be very happy to not look at another penis again for a long while has found that the average length of the average man's thingamajig is 5.16 inches. That should bring some comfort to a lot of men who likely spent a lot of their lives feeling below average in the underwear department. And it will likely make a good number of other men feel even more bummed out than ever. Fun fact about mine: I have a penis-shaped dick. Ummm... moving on.  At the Star Wars Celebration convention in Anaheim sometime in April they are gonna be showing a brand new Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer. Well, here on the Phile I have an exclusive picture from that trailer. Wanna see it?

Man, those Frozen characters are taking over.  I was flicking through the channels the other day and I stumbled across "Wheel of Fortune" and I thought I figured out the sentence... but I was waayyy off.

See how I could think of something else? No? Great. I'm the sick bastard.  Hey, wanna see something stupid?

Haha. That's so bloody stupid.  One of the things I like to do in my spare time is to go on Twitter and look up certain words. One of those words I look up is 'Foghat' and this is one Tweet I recently found.

I don't get it, but thank you Evangelium Christi. Speaking of Foghat I found this on-line and thought I'd share it. It's a billboard from 1874 and I thought was really cool.

I love to shop, but sometimes I don't feel like going out, so thank God you can shop on-line. Anyway, here's a new pheature about items you should only ever buy online...


So Amazon, Google, the NSA, and anyone else who's looking thinks that you read.

No, the answer is they are not all virgins. Ha. If you spot the Mindphuck let me know.

Malaysian Airlines Flight 370 
Malaysian Airlines Flight 370 is a popular television show that first aired on CNN March 8, 2014 and continues running to this day.

Alright, today's guest has been one of my best friends for the last 15 years or so. You know him from the Phootball Talk pheature on the Phile. Now he's the author of "Everything Comes Full Circle",  the 35th book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club. Please welcome to the Phile... Jeff R. Trelewicz.

Me: Jeff! Welcome back to the Phile. You've been here many of times over the years but this time you are the pheatured guest. How does that make you feel? About fucking time, right? I would of had you here awhile ago my my life got shall we say... complicated.

Jeff: For all the times that I have appeared on the Phile for Phootball Talk and my various other appearances, it is great to be here finally as pheatured guest. Or should I say phinally! And don't worry about it. You weren't the only one whose life got complicated.

Me: Okay, before we talk about your book and everything let's talk about football... we didn't get to finish Phootball Talk and pick the playoff games and Super Bowl as my life got in the way. As you know and some readers might or might not know I am going through a divorce so that put the Phile on hold. Anyway, I have to announce you won this season football picks, Jeff. What was the final score, do you know?

Jeff: I had to go double check the final numbers including the wild card round. I did win the Phootball Talk with the final score being 48 points for me and 41 points for you. It was a close season between the two of us. Really, only 3.5 games between us so if we had continued you could have easily caught up to me. I will tell you what. Last season was kind of a mess all together. I am officially waving it off as is if it didn't even happen. Next season we will have the tie breaker between you and I instead.

Me: Okay. Deal. Congrats, anyway. So, what did you think of the Super Bowl? I thought it was one of the best games ever. That ending was pretty incredible.

Jeff: I thought the Super Bowl was a great game. I am not making excuses but Seattle's defense was pretty beat up with three of the four defensive backs being injured. And it still came down to a horrible call by Seattle's coaching staff. But I do understand why they did what they did.

Me: One thing I wish we could of talked about when it was happening was this whole Deflate Gate mess. For those that don't know what it is, or was, can you tell them?

Jeff: Deflate Gate stemmed from the AFC Championship Game, which was held between New England and the Colts. It was held in New England. It turns out that 11 of the 12 balls that were selected for the Patriots offense were under inflated from the NFL rules. What that basically means is it was easier for them to throw it, because there wasn't as much air in the ball, easier to catch and made it harder to fumble. By half time the referees had been made aware of this and new balls were given to the offense that were regulation size.

Me: What was your take on it? Do you think the Patriots cheated?

Jeff: Do I think it was cheating? Yeah I do. This isn't the first time New England has been accused of cheating in a football game. Regardless if the NFL penalizes the team or not, there is such a stigma on the team. Although I have seen die hard fans still support the team and even deny there was anything wrong. It happens with every team. You never want to admit your team was wrong.

Me: What do you think is gonna come out of it?

Jeff: I think there will be a fine on the team, a small one but a fine regardless. And the locker room attendant responsible for it will lose his job. But I don't think there will be anything more than that for the team.

Me: Alright, enough of football talk. So, you were living in Jersey but you recently moved to Connecticut, right? How has your winter been, Jeff?

Jeff: Winter has been hard in Connecticut since the move. It has snowed almost every week, including a near blizzard a few weeks ago. In fact, as I look out the window it's snowing again. It has snowed more since I moved here a month ago then I think it did all last year when I was in New Jersey. As far as beyond that, I'm doing okay. Like I said, you're not the only person whose life got complicated.

Me: Okay, so last August I interviewed Jeremy Croston here as you know and pheatured his book "Power Play: Ragnarok On Ice". We both worked with Jeremy at Disney. I remember back then you used to write screen plays but now you hav written a book, and it's because of Jeremy and me interviewing, right?

Jeff: That's right. Because of your interview with Jeremy, I reached out to him via social media to congratulate him on his first book. We started talking almost daily and I said that I thought maybe it was something I would try as well. Jeremy had mentioned that he wanted to make a trailer for his book. I had some time and since video editing was a passion of mine, I wanted to surprise him with a trailer of my own. It was at about that point that we decided to make it easier on the two of us, we would form our own publishing company that reflects us as people and us as writers. So we are two dudes who like beer and books. That's where the name Two Dudes, Brews and Books came from.

Me: Okay, let's talk about your book "Everything Comes Full Circle." When did you start to write that book, Jeff?

Jeff: I started writing "Everything Comes Full Circle" in August of 2014 and finished it in late December. I took an old screenplay that I had written in 2008 and adapted the format to make it a novel instead. But I also made a lot of changes. I was in a much different place mentally last year when I was writing then when I first wrote it, so changes were made. Characters evolved and scenes were all but re-written to reflect my new mood.

Me: How is writing a novel different then writing a screenplay?

Jeff: Writing a screenplay and writing a novel are two entirely different processes. The biggest difference is something I have to learn to adapt to. Screenplays tend to be more dialogue based with little on descriptions unless it's an important to the story. So my first book unfortunately does have that issue. It is mostly dialogue. It's something I am looking to fix. But writing is writing. It's about getting your thoughts out on paper. It can definitely be very therapeutic, regardless of the medium you write in.

Me: Okay, so, tell the readers what the book is about.

Jeff: "Everything Comes Full Circle" is about a high school theater department that reunites nine years later to perform the same show they did years ago. There is comedy and there is drama. There is even a bit of romance in the story. It's about how no matter how much time they spent away from each other, they came back and fell into the same patterns of friendship they did while they were in high school.

Me: So, did you do theatre in school, Jeff?

Jeff: As a matter of fact, I was in theater when I was in high school and college. My sophomore year of high school, I started to think that I needed something on my resume for colleges. I'm not very athletic, though I was at one point going to try out for two sports. But I decided I would try out for the theater group.

Me: What plays did you do? When I went to a private school on Long Island for six years and summer camp we had to do a play every year. I did everything from "Oliver", to "Grease" and even a play of The Muppet Movie.

Jeff: The first show I was in wasn't a well known show at all. It was called "Don't Rock The Boat" and I played the role of Pirate # 2. It was a comedy about three pirates who took over a cruise ship. From there, I was in "Li'L Abner" (based off the old comic), "Fiddler On The Roof" and "A Midsummer Night's Dream". Two years later, I would once again appear in "A Midsummer Night's Dream" this time in college. I enjoyed theater so much I made it my minor.

Me: Did you take anything from real life and put in the book? For example, is there a character based on me? Haha.

Jeff: There is plenty of experiences from "Everything Comes Full Circle" from my real life. No, there is not a character based on you in it. Not this time. But that doesn't mean I won't put you in a future novel if you would like. As far as a character based on me in the book? There is.

Me: I have to ask you about the title, where did that come from?

Jeff: The title of the book was actually inspired by a song by the group Aerosmith. They have a song called "Full Circle" from 1995. There is even a paraphrasing of one of the lyrics in the book.

Me: So, what has the reviews been like for the book, Jeff?

Jeff: Reviews of the book have been mostly positive. There was one very negative one. It isn't easy to read negative reviews of anything. Thankfully the reviewer admitted to not having actually read the entire book, so Amazon took it down. Most reviewers know it's my first book so mistakes will be made that will not occur in future books. It's a learning process. And I appreciate that most people recognize that.

Me: I like the cover of the book, Jeff. Did that idea come to you easily or did you have a bunch of other covers in mind?

Jeff: I am glad you like the cover. I actually designed it myself. It really came down to three different covers that I had designed that were all similar in style. I had actually taken photos for the other covers, but they didn't look as good.

Me: So, now you have this book out are you planning on writing another book, Jeff?

Jeff: I am actually in the process of writing two other books. They are completely separate ideas from the original. One would be a short story and the other is another full novel. I am hoping to release a total of two novels and the short story this year. I am just not sure the short story will have enough material. But we will see.

Me: You must be thrilled you have a book out, right? What does your parents think about it?

Jeff: My parents have encouraged me every step of the way. My dad has even offered to edit the next book for me.

Me: Your book is on Kindle right now... any plans on releasing it as a paperback?

Jeff: I am definitely considering releasing it in paperback as well. A lot of friends have asked me for an autographed copy! I am thinking that when I release my second book on the Kindle, I will release the first one in paperback form. Possibly with an alternate ending or an additional scene or two.

Me: Okay, so, on the Phile I ask random questions thanks to Tabletopics, so I have to ask you, Jeff. If you had to move which part of the country would you want to move to? That's a bad question, you just moved. I am guessing you'd say California though. Am I right?

Jeff: No, that's not a bad question. The move to Connecticut is only temporary. I am planning on moving soon, once I get back on my feet. I am looking somewhere out west, but not California. A fresh start in Arizona sounds like a good choice for me at this point.That is the plan right now.

Me: Jeff, thanks so much for everything you have done on the Phile over the years. You even took part in my anniversary entries. Congrats on the book, and I hope you will come back again soon. Tell the readers where they can get the book.

Jeff: Thank you for this opportunity to be a guest on the Phile. I look forward to the return of Phootball Talk and any other time you would have me as a guest here on the Phile. Best of luck to you and to your readers as well. If you don't mind giving me a chance to plug the website that I use to talk about my novels? Check out Thank you for years of friendship as well. I'm sorry that you had the year that you had last year, but hey? It only can get better, right? That's what I keep telling myself.

Me: Yup. Q: Thanks again, and take care of yourself. You''ll be back on the Phile soon.

That about does it for this entry. Thanks to Jeff for a great interview. The Phile will be back next Sunday with Phile Alum Alexis White and then next Monday it's Phile Alum Ari Gold and his brother Ethan Gold. Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.

Not if it pleases me. No, you can't stop me, not if it pleases me. - Graham Parker

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