Sunday, July 23, 2017

Pheaturing PRIME

Hey, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Sunday. How are you? Let's start off this nice Sunday with a story about a local magazine featuring a man holding the most phallic-looking shoe I've ever seen. A Phile reader recently directed my attention towards the cover of a magazine cover on which a man is holding up a kid's shoe. Only, it really, really doesn't look like a shoe. In fact, it looks quite a bit more like… something else. Do you see what we're getting at here?

Calm down, it's a shoe. The magazine is called "Ladue News" (Ladue is a wealthy suburb of St. Louis, Missouri), and it comes out twice a month. According to the reader, the man in the picture is Bill Busch, a local celebrity and one of the heirs to the Anheuser-Busch fortune. Busch's charity, which the magazine was promoting, is called Old Newsboys, and it helps raise money for local kids' charities. Which explains why he's surrounded by kids in the photo. Luckily those kids will not scarred because, again, that's a shoe Busch is holding, not his penis. Just a kid's shoe, nothing to see here, move along.
Sean Spicer has officially exited the Trump Administration, much to the excitement of the White House gardeners. So what does the former Press Secretary of a president who's redefining media have to say about his job? Not much, it turns out. Spicer gave his first post-resignation interview to Fox's Sean Hannity on Friday night, and he pretty much used the platform to complain about Melissa McCarthy's portrayal of him on "SNL." In an interview that aired Friday night on "Hannity," Spicer admitted, "I'm a prankster, I like a good joke. I think when it's funny, it's funny," but added, "Sometimes it goes from funny to mean." As noted by "The Hollywood Reporter," Spicer doesn't seem to have a sense of humor about McCarthy's beloved screaming, spitting, water-gun toting caricature. "I think that there were parts of it that were funny, but there's a lot of it that was over the line," Spicer told Hannity. "It wasn't funny. It was stupid, or silly, or malicious." Here's where you're wrong, buddy, it was definitely funny. Spicer then tried to wheel back his statements, "But there were some skits on late-night television that I did crack up at. You have to have a little bit of a thick skin if you're going to do this."
I'm all for spending money on frivolous beauty products, but not when it comes at the expense of a new insecurity for women. A Scandinavian company named The Perfect V has created an entire range of products to fluff and buff the female body part it only describes as "the V." The worst offender? A Very V Luminizer, intended to "highlight, soften, and illuminate" your genitals. "Luminious iridescent color to add some extra prettiness to the V," according to the brand. You may never have looked down before and thought, "I wish I had some iridescent color down here," and this $42 pseudo-moisturizer wants to change that. Of course, if you do prefer a little artificial vaginal glow, please go forth and illuminate. But it's the assumption that all vagina owners need some sort of genital highlighter that's, sorry to use this term, problematic. Women are already taught to line their lips and tuck their tummies. Let's not make them self conscious about their vaginas as well. The products' tagline is "Nordic Purity," which conjures up an image of a thin, white, blonde woman, who's apparently also a virgin with a glowing vagina. As Ellen Scott writes in Metro, "Your vagina does not need to be tighter than a fiercely clenched fist and as pink as a ballet slipper. Your labia do not need to be minimal, with a smooth skin tone that’s been perfectly highlighted and contoured." Aside from the disturbing gender politics at play here, it's also important to check with your doctor before applying random creams you ordered online to a potentially life-giving organ. The few listed ingredients here include elderflower and Vitamin E and 50 mL of a proprietary concoction simply known as "Shades of V™ Luminizer." Other product options include a serum, beauty mist, beauty sheets, and a "gentle exfoliator." If you want to create an entire skin care routine for your vagina... go for it. But please, don't make your woman buy it.
O.J. Simpson will be a free man. On Thursday afternoon, O.J. Simpson stood before a Nevada parole board after nearly nine years in state prison. The 70-year-old was not, obviously, requesting parole for his role in the killings of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown Simpson... although the Internet has often used it as a referendum on that crime. Rather, the charges stemmed from a 2008 "kidnapping and robbery" in a Las Vegas hotel, according to the "New York Times." This was his first opportunity to leave prison, nine years after his conviction and sentencing to "nine to 33 years in prison." A unanimous verdict was required by the four-member parole panel at the hearing to release O.J. from prison. If they could not decide, then two other commissioners would weigh in... and a decision would be made on a simple majority. A three-to-three split would have resulted in a new hearing in six months, according to CNN. The parole board ended up voting 4-0 after deliberating for less than an hour. The verdict did not come as a surprise, as O.J. Simpson has been considered a "model prisoner" over nearly the last decade. Nonetheless, it was difficult for Americans... and the world... to watch Simpson's parole without making a connection to his famous double murder trial in 1994. During the parole hearing on Thursday, Simpson said, "I've basically spent a conflict-free life." The commenters on the ABC News live stream were extremely unimpressed by Simpson's performance during his hearing, citing his inability to take responsibility for the crimes that resulted in his nine- to 33-year sentence, and his rambling, "relitigating" defense. The hearing began awkwardly as well, with the chairman accidentally referring to the 70-year-old Simpson as a 90-year-old. "I feel like it," he said. The earliest Simpson will be released from prison is on October 1st.
It's starting to seem like airlines don't even want passengers. Just two months after JetBlue kicked a Brooklyn family off a flight because of a birthday cake (yes, a birthday cake), another Brooklyn family says they were kicked off a flight because their child kicked the seat in front of her (an annoying thing children often do). And JetBlue is defending its crew members' decision to kick the family of five off the flight after an "unfortunate incident" on July 2nd, "People" reports. Here's the family's story, according to a press release sent to "People" by the couple’s lawyer David Templer,  "Tamir Raanan and Mandy Ifrah were returning to New York from Fort Lauderdale with their three kids when their 1-year-old daughter Eden became 'agitated' and kicked the seat in front of her. Ifrah apologized to the woman whose seat her daughter kicked, and 'exchanged a few words' with her, before moving to an empty seat in another part of the plane," the statement claims. The family says that a flight attendant then asked the pilot to return to the gate and they were then asked to disembark the plane. The family filmed the incident, and shared it on YouTube in two parts. In part one, you can see them refusing to leave the plane when asked by a flight attendant, and demanding an explanation (which it appears they never got). In the second clip, Raanan and Ifrah are seen in a heated argument with airline staff and police officers at the gate, and they continue to demand an explanation for being kicked off the flight. At one point in the first video, Ifrah asks why the other woman on the plane wasn't removed, saying repeatedly, "The lady said 'Tie your daughter’s feet!'" Templer told "People" that being kicked off the flight "caused huge problems for the family." He added, "it could have been resolved with an apology and payment of defenses, but we were not successful in getting JetBlue to offer us an explanation." JetBlue, of course, offers a different account of what went down. In a statement released to "People," the airline says that the verbal altercation between the two passengers "included physical threats and profanities against a nearby customer." The statement from JetBlue continues, "The aircraft door was reopened and our airports team politely asked the customers to step off to discuss the situation. The customers refused repeated requests and our crewmembers deplaned the entire aircraft. Law enforcement escorted them out of the gate area and we provided a refund. The customers were not removed due to the actions of their children. We are investigating whether the customers’ behavior warrants restrictions on JetBlue travel and we thank our crew members for their professional handling of this unfortunate incident." According to the statement from the couple's lawyer, JetBlue told them they would be booked on a flight the next day, but they would need to find overnight accommodations. The statement also alleges that the airline "did not remove their luggage from the plane leaving them without clothes and baby supplies" and also that the family was banned from all future flights. Hard to know exactly what went down on the plane with that other passenger, and if the airline actually had any justification in removing these passengers. But regardless, kicking people off a plane with no explanation, especially when they're traveling with kids, is not a good look, JetBlue. And given this and other airlines' truly terrible track records, I'm inclined to side with the passengers. Most of the time.
Hey, it's Sunday... instead of doing this blog thing I should be listening to this CD...

I should see if Greg Kendrick is available for an interview. San Diego Comic Con is going on and they released a trailer for the next avengers movie and I have an exclusive screen shot of it.

It looks so exciting. Haha. Ever go to Goodwill? I've been there just once but if I realized I could get something like this there then I might go back...

Hmmm. Is that two women on the box? So, if you are thinking about, or are cheating on your loved one you might wanna reconsider after seeing this...

Linnie, you're an asshole. Last week I told you about about Kellyanne Conway holding up two signs on TV... well, she held up two other signs recently as well.

Okay, I sure will, Kellyanne. Ever run into a celebrity and realize what you are wearing is very appropriate? This guy did...

You know how some places have tip jars? Well, some people get vey creative with them...

Alright, so, I'm haven some car problems but not as much as this guy had...

"Go work at the Rady Children's store, they said. Get in on the ground floor, they said." Hahaha. Poor guy. I don't know about you, but I like to obey the rules all the time. Some people though just take it a little bit too far.

Haha. And now from the home office in Port Jefferson, New York, here is...

Top Phive Reasons To Phree O.J. Simpson
5. He'll finally be able to resume his tireless search for the "real killers."
4. With all the nonstop depressing Trump news, America needs a feel-good story.
3. He'd be rating gold on "Dancing with the Stars."
2. Everyone agrees that he's been a model citizen, as repugnant, lying murderers go.
And the number one reason to free O.J. Simpson is...
1. This might be out last chance to get that long-awaited Nordberg movie.

Haha. If you spot the Mindphuck let me know. It's a pretty easy one. Okay, so, if you are going on a date, or back to work tomorrow and you want to show off and seem intelligent, here is a brand new pheature that might help you.

Phact 1: Salma Hayek as a young teen went to a church that was known for performing miracles, and wished for breasts.
Phact 2: Violin strains have been made from 5000 strands of spider silk. They produce "a soft and profound timbre" when played.
Phact 3: Bill Gates and Warren Buffett went to China to encourage their billionaires about the benefits of Philanthropy (giving to their community), they were mainly ignored because Philanthropy (outside of supporting family) is not part of Chinese culture.
Phact 4: Winston Churchill had a plan called Operation Unthinkable to invade the Soviet Union in a surprise attack immediately after the end of World War 2. His plan was finally shot down when it was learned that the Soviet troops remaining outnumbered allied troops 3 to 1.
Phact 5: Hitler's plan for Moscow was capturing it during World War 2 was to kill all its residents and replace it with a lake.

Are you lazy? Well, I bet you're not as lazy as this person...

He must've just read the Phile. Haha.

President Donald Trump's handshakes with world leaders have become an international spectator sport, as people around the world marvel at how a grown man turns a traditional greeting into a game of macho dominance. While Trump is known to yank at peoples' arms with such force to show off just how masculine and strong he is, it turns out that what the president aspires to is something way more tender. In an absolutely bonkers interview with the "New York Times" where he said that he wouldn't have chosen Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III as Attorney General if he knew that he would recuse himself on Russia matters and threatening Special Prosecutor Bob Mueller, Trump made a point to highlight his "bromance" with French President Emmanuel Macron. Here, in the sacred "Times" (Haberman is Maggie Haberman, one of the reporters), Trump: He’s a great guy. Smart. Strong. Loves holding my hand. Haberman: I’ve noticed. Trump: People don’t realize he loves holding my hand. And that’s good, as far as that goes. I mean, really. He’s a very good person. And a tough guy, but look, he has to be. I think he is going to be a terrific president of France. But he does love holding my hand. Why is Trump obsessed with Macron being supposedly obsessed with his hand? He mentioned this not once, not twice, but thrice. Hmm... is a hand actually a hand? Maybe Macron loves holding Trump's hand because they're so tiny—like dedicated little birds.Anyway, this weird subplot is a welcome addition to an interview that full-out attacks the justice department and threatens the Russia investigation.

The 63rd book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club is...

Author, singer and Phile Alum Karling Abbeygate will be the guest on the Phile next Sunday, a week from today.

Birth Control Pill
The birth control pill (or colloquially, the pill) is an oral contraceptive that allows women to worry solely about getting STDs.

Today's pheatured guest is a talented singer and songwriter whose new single "Poison" is available on  iTunes. Please welcome to the Phile... PRIME.

Me: Hey, there, welcome to the Phile. How are you doing?

PRIME: I’m doing very well. Thanks for having me on the Phile!

Me: Of course.  Q: Okay, so, I have to ask you about your name... PRIME. Where did the name originate from?

PRIME: The name references the period of time in every person’s life where they are at their best. I’d like people to think about the word, feel the word, and be inspired by it.

Me: You have a wide range of descent... Filipino, Chinese, Spanish and Indian... is that Indian like Native American or Indian like you're from India?

PRIME: From India. You'd be surprised. The Philippines are SO ethnically diverse. We've been colonized by the Spaniards and the Chinese, amongst others.

Me: Have you visited any of those places, PRIME?

PRIME: Unfortunately no, but I would love to as soon as my budget permits me. LOL.

Me: You were raised in New York City... were you born there?

PRIME: I was born in the Philippines then immigrated to New York City when I was 8-years-old.

Me: You started singing when you were 3-years-old, right? What songs were you singing back then?

PRIME: “The sun will come out tomorrow… bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow… there’ll be sun…” "Annie" was one of my favorite childhood musicals. I was a huge fan of early Disney movies. Snow White and the Seven Dwarves was on heavy rotation. Til this day, I remember all the songs and lyrics.

Me: "Annie" is one of my favorites. How old were you when you knew you wanted to make a career being a singer?

PRIME: My dad’s family was in the music business. So, since I was very young, it felt natural to pursue a music career. My schools’ productions always included me in shows, and at times, my teachers would ask me to sing in front of the class to kill time. I happily obliged of course.

Me: And you were 7 when you started playing the piano? Do you still play, PRIME?

PRIME: Yes, I still do play, but I am by no means an expert at the piano. I'm not as good as I'd wish to be.

Me: When you are writing your songs, did you write on piano?

PRIME: No, the melody comes to me first. And it sometimes comes at the most unexpected times... in the middle of a conversation, while working out, or reading the news. So whatever the occasion, I excuse myself and record it on my phone as soon as I can. My ADHD is actually an asset!

Me: How long have you been songwriting?

PRIME: I've been songwriting for about 7 years now.

Me: Is that something you do often or do you write when you kinda have to?

PRIME: I write when I'm inspired. But inspiration can come from any emotion. When I'm down, I write. When I'm in love, I write. But when I'm feeling lazy, hell no!

Me: You went to LaGuardia High School of Performing Arts... is that by the airport? Was that a good experience for you?

PRIME: Haha! It's actually located in Manhattan. I can see why you'd confuse it with the airport. Funny story, I told a friend of mine to pick me up in front of La Guardia High School. I waited for hours. He went to the airport instead! And yes, it was a very good experience. I've met the best people in that school, and I'm still good friends with them to this day.

Me: You look so young... when did you graduate from the school?

PRIME: Now now, you should never ask a lady anything that could give away her age…

Me: Okay, good point. Did you do any acting at the school?

PRIME: The only time I was involved in acting at the school was when I'd sneak in to watch the acting majors run around like monkeys in the room. It looked hella fun. I wanted to join in badly.

Me: You definitely have an eye for fashion and go for different looks. Is that something you have fun coming up with?

PRIME: Yes! I work with my close friend and photographer Kristina (KOLL). She and I met in LaGuardia High School, and we were both art majors. Not only does she take my photos, she also co-produces my music with me. We always create a story behind the persona of whatever look we're going for. Where is he from? What’s his story? What's his overall attitude at the moment? All that. Because of the back story, the shoots always turn out fun and effortless.

Me: What does your family think of your music and all your looks?

PRIME: My family is very supportive of my music. When it comes to my looks, my family had always been used to me dressing up. So anything I do at this point doesn't shock them. In nursery school, I'd refuse to go to school if I wasn't in costume... and this somewhat still applies now. Everyday is an opportunity to dress up and express my emotions.

Me: Your bio described you as "if Usher, Michael Jackson and Freddie Mercury had a baby..." I take it those three guys are influences of yours. Who else did you listen to growing up?

PRIME: My dad’s a musician so he exposed me to a ton of artists. The Beatles, Nat King Cole, The Beach Boys, The Jacksons. A slew of artists from the 40s to the 80s (Madonna, Prince, Phil Collins). Because of my dad, I am able to listen to music with an open perspective.

Me: Some of your looks and your music I can hear and see a David Bowie influence... am I right?

PRIME: Yes, definitely. Stylistically... he inspires me. He’s ambiguous and I’d like to reflect that in my artistry... in fashion and also in my music. I gravitate towards a lot of music. I’d like to just create the music that I want to at the moment... whether it’s alternative, or rhythm and blues or dance.

Me: I like your single "Poison." That song I could tell is definitely about someone in particular... who is that, PRIME? Does he or she know there's a song about them?

PRIME: He knows who he is. He sleeps with me every night.

Me: Cool. What was the inspiration behind that song?

PRIME: It's about feeling vulnerable when falling in love. You don't entirely know what the other person is feeling. Do you take the risk and let your guard down completely.

Me: Did you do all the music for it or did you hire a band?

PRIME: For “Poison," I wrote the melody and worked with Natasha Knight Williams on the production.

Me: I can definitely picture that song being played at clubs through the summer... was it written with that in mind?

PRIME: I wouldn't say we had it in mind. The vocal melody alone insinuates a high-energy feel. So it felt natural to make the production sound “clubby."

Me: So, is "Poison" your first single? Are you coming out with any more music?

PRIME: “Poison” is my official first single. And yes, there's more music coming out! I've been in the studio these past few weeks just writing music. I'm very inspired at this moment.

Me: Have you been playing any live shows?

PRIME: I used to have a band and we played a lot of live shows. I still have very fond memories of it. As a solo act, my priorities right now are to write and create music. The shows will come later.

Me: So, in five years time what do you see yourself doing?

PRIME: I see myself performing. I see myself writing and collaborating with other artists. I see myself using my talents in every way I can. I see myself exploring the world and learning from different people.

Me: I wish you lots of luck, and I hope this was fun and I hope you'll come back on the Phile soon. Mention your website and take care. All the best.

PRIME: To view my work go to A big thank you to the Phile! I had a lot of fun with this interview.

Me: Great. Take care and continued success. Come back again soon.

That about does it doe this entry of the Phile. Thanks to PRIME for a great interview. The Phile will be back tomorrow with singer songwriter, the legendary Joe Jackson. Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.

Not if it pleases me. No, you can't stop me, not if it pleases me. - Graham Parker

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