Sunday, September 27, 2015

Pheaturing Phile Alum Lila Rose

Hello, welcome to another entry of the Phile for a Sunday. How are you doing?  Let's start this entry of with a story about an esscaped tarantula that grounded a plane in Baltimore. Gross, Baltimore! An escaped tarantula grounded a Delta flight in Baltimore on Wednesday evening. Baggage handlers noticed that a carrier for the hell beast was empty, which prompted the captain to ground the flight until they could locate the spider. It was not in the bathroom near the gate, or checking out expensive luggage it couldn't afford, it was just relaxing in the cargo hold. They were able to retrieve the spider and safely return it back to its cage. There is a lesson here for road warriors and those who fly often: if you don't want your luggage damaged or lost, just add a spider. Or put your stuff it in a giant fake spider, and then check an empty carrier cage. Then they'll be certain to find it.  Sit down and buckle up because there's big Jennifer Lawrence hair news. Twenty-five year old actress and Amy Schumer BFF Jennifer Lawrence has shocked us once again with a hair-related decision that is sending ripples of disbelief through Hollywood, the country, and indeed the entire solar system. Little green men on Jupiter just got chills and had no idea why, and the reason is because J Law dyed her hair platinum blonde. The slightly-lighter-than-her-natural-color shade came from absolutely nowhere. At least it's not as disturbing as her flirtation with a pixie cut, from which we and the general public have still not entirely recovered. Here's a pic if you wanna see yourself...

Good news! You can now be that person who wears a sexy #TheDress Halloween costume. The good folks at, who previously made it possible for to dress up as sexy French fries, have now delivered the Halloween costume we all know someone who would wear: a sexy #TheDress costume. In case you've been on a monastic retreat in the mountains of Nepal since before February, #TheDress was a fun Internet phenomenon where everyone fought over the color of this dress. To some, it looked gold and white. To others, it looked blue and black. (The correct answer is that it looked gold and white at first but then suddenly switched to blue and black, because that's what happened to me.) After much debate, we discovered that the actual dress is black and blue. You can also buy the real #TheDress as a costume, but you're gonna have to cut some strategic slits to make it sexy.  Now for some more serious news... Mohammed Umar Farooq, a postgraduate student of counter-terrorism at Staffordshire University in England, was accused of being a terrorist after a school official saw him reading a textbook entitled "Terrorism Studies" in the library. He was then questioned by someone who he thought was a fellow student, but turned out to be a complaints officer. Even though his responses to the questions were "largely academic" and expressed his "personal opposition to extremist views," the exchange was reported to the school's security guards, as people thought it raised "too many red flags." Farooq got in touch with a lawyer to fight the complaint, and after an investigation, the university apologized for the oversight: "We have apologised to Mr. Farooq and are in dialogue with him on how we can support him to continue his studies with us. In light of recent legislation, we are ensuring all staff at the university have the right guidance and training." Apparently the guy who questioned him only had a "few hours [of] training." Still, the event exposed the university to the problems in their anti-radicalization initiatives and demonstrated how easily the "broad duty" of combatting radicalism can be mishandled. Farrow seemed pretty shook up by the whole thing, and has been "looking over his shoulder" since it happened. He had the following to say: "The implications if I did not challenge this could be serious for me. I could go on a police list, I could be investigated without my knowledge. This could happen to any young Muslim lad. I had to fight back[.]” Good thing this was an isolated incident. Oh, wait, it wasn't. Miru Kim is an artist and photographer who lives in New York City. She was stopped the other day for wearing a shirt with Arabic on it by two police officers who don't have enough to do with themselves. Kim posted about it on Instagram with a very unhappy looking selfie.

Her caption reads, "I just got stopped by two police officers in downtown Manhattan just because I was wearing this shirt from an anti-Iraq war group called Granny Peace Brigade from 2006. They took all my info, address, apt. number, cellphone, right in front of my building. Are they serious, NYPD? Are they gonna call me a potential terrorist because I am wearing a shirt with Arabic on it? When did NYC become so xenophobic?" The Granny Peace Brigade is literally a group of grandmothers who protest for peace, and they did share this shirt during one of their actions. About ten years ago. Wow, the Iraq War has been a part of our lives a long time! It's interesting that the officers were so intimidated by Arabic lettering, especially when the translation is right below it. Ironically, it means "we will not be silent." Maybe they thought the translation was a red herring, and the Arabic line actually said, "If you can read this, let's build a bomb together." It doesn't though! Kim's frustration is understandable, especially when the cops' behavior was so illogical. Are they going to call her later and ask, "Are you suuuuuuure your t-shirt isn't a threat?" Somewhere in New York right now are two police officers trying to stop all translated language postings under suspicion of terrorism. Probably more than two, actually, since the Pope was in town and there's a lot of Italian signage to help him find his way around.  Speaking of the Pope, the Pope spoke to a large crowd gathered outside the Capitol Building, and John Boehner didn't last three seconds without bawling his eyes out. It would be moving and beautiful (it has been a lifelong goal of Mr. Boehner to have a Pope speak to Congress) if it weren't for the fact that John Boehner cries at the drop of a hat. It looks like so many tears have welled up inside his head that they went into his mouth first. It took all his lip-strength to not vomit tears directly onto Pope Francis. John Boehner has been the Speaker of the House since 2011, and in that short time he has cried about a statue of Rosa Parks, a statue of Winston Churchill, and that one time some Irish music played on Saint Patrick's Day. It seems like there is little on this planet that won't make John Boehner cry. Now that Speaker Boehner is resigning from his seat in Congress, he will only be able to cry at things from afar. Private sob sessions are often much more intense than public ones for most people, but this man is different. If anything happens and Boehner isn't there to see it, does he still cry? My guess is that even in retirement, even if he never reads or watches the news, he'll be husking corn in a field in Ohio somewhere, and know in his bones that there's something out there to be cried over. And he will weep. He'll weep large Boehner tears. Maybe the large crowd just startled Mr. Boehner into crying. Or maybe this was an actual cathartic moment, as he, a Jesuit-educated man, finally lived to see a Jesuit Pope speak to the American people in person. Or it could have been literally anything. The guy just cries a lot. There's a new portrait of Boehner that was just painted as well.

He's the Weeper of the House. Haha.  So, as you know the Pope visited New York and I have an exclusive photo of his visit...

I don't remember him being in that Pizza Rat video. I guess I wasn't paying attention. That's so stupid.  Wanna see what else is stupid?

A little Diddy with Jack and Diane. Hahahahahaha.  Alright, I am an Apple fan, but I know a lot of you like Microsoft. Did you see Microsoft's new ad?

I guess they kinda do. Hmmmm. And now from the home office in Port Jefferson, New York, here is this week's...

Top Phive Startling Similarities And Differences Between Scott Walker And Pizza Rat
5. Has captured the imaginations of millions of Americans.
4. Wasn't deterred by his seemingly hopeless quest.
3. Went downwards gracefully.
2. Was a factor in recent Republican presidential polls.
And the number one thing similar and different between Walker and the Pizza Rat is...
1. At the end of the day, is just a filthy, pointy-nosed rodent.

Yogi Berra 
May 12th, 1925 — September 22nd, 2015 
Maybe now he can finally get his hands on some pick-a-nick baskets, eh, Boo Boo?

Hahahahahahaha. This is my favorite Mindphuck ever I think. Let me know if you spot it. I am laughing so much. Oh, boy. Okay, so, a friend of the Phile saw something that made him feel like Michael J. Fox looking at his family picture in Back to the Future. He's a singer, patriot and renaissance man. You know what time it is...

Happy Sunday, phuckerz. Just noticed a part of my history is gone... Dropped off a client at an address that seemed familiar to me. As I pulled up, I noticed that it was The Hit Factory... a place I recorded at... the place I met David Bowie... the place that Stevie Nicks asked my opinion of what key she should record one of her songs in... the place John Lennon recorded "Double Fantasy." The last building he exited from the night he lost his life. The place was still there. Still had the old signage saying The Hit Factory on the front. Only now, the recording studio is gone and the rooms have all turned into pricey condos for the NYC elite. I love New York... but I just caught a glimpse of it's soul slipping away... of a ghost drifting away from its former home... very sad.

The 31st artist to be pheatured in the Phile's Art Gallery is Ivan Lovatt and this is one of his pieces...

I think that's Mick Jagger. Anyway, Ivan will be the guest on the Phile tomorrow.

Today's pheatured guest is a Phile Alum and very talented and beautiful singer whose latest album "WE.ANIMALS." is available on iTunes. She also has a very beautiful video out for the song "This Could Be Ha." Please welcome back to the Phile... Lila Rose!

Me: Hey, Lila, welcome back to the Phile. How have you been?

Lila: I've been mostly great, thanks!

Me: It's been almost a year since you were here last. Since then you moved to California, am I right? What part did you move to?

Lila: I've been living in California for almost 7 years now actually. I still love it. I live in Oakland.

Me: Oh, that's right. I have no idea why I thought you just moved there. You've been playing quite a few shows recently. Do you like playing live?

Lila: I live for it!

Me: What has been your favorite show you have done so far?

Lila: My album release show for "WE.ANIMALS." at The Independent in San Francisco for sure.

Me: When you were here last you mentioned the new album "WE.ANIMALS." which has since come out. I downloaded that album from iTunes and really like it. Are you proud of the final release, Lila?

Lila: Yes I am!

Me: The cover is beautiful with you and a lioness or panther over it. Are feline animals your favorite?

Lila: I love all animals. There is an elephant and a lion overlaid over my face. And I am holding a gun to my head, which is very dark so it's hard to tell if you don't know.

Me: Oh, I see that now. Originally the album was gonna have a slightly different cover, right? Wanna show that here?

Lila: Sure.

Lila: The only difference is I am revealing my upper body in its raw form... which would have been banned from digital stores.

Me: Were you forced to change it, or was that your choice?

Lila: It was a choice (sort of). I was abiding by the "release" laws... essentially I could chosen the nudity and known certain sites and stores would not have sold it.

Me: I always admired your freedom and that you did much do what you want. Were you that way when you were growing up?

Lila: Pretty much, yeah! I'm a "controlled" wild though.

Me: "WE.ANIMALS." has an underline theme, am I right? What would that theme be, Lila?

Lila: The theme is the interconnectedness of all life forms. The state of emergency we are facing as a planet, and the importance of recognizing our dependency on one another (plants, animals, water, air, etc).

Me: You really care for the world and the environment, don't you?

Lila: I sure do.

Me: You have a new single out and video called "This Could Be Ha." When I first saw the title when I downloaded the album I thought iTunes made a mistake and cut off the last word, until I heard the song. So, I have to ask, why "This Could Be Ha" and not "This Could Be Harder"?

Lila: Ha is like HA!!! Like "So HA!" Like "TAKE THAT!" You know... It's like "wake the fuck up". HA.

Me: Ahhhh.  I love the video, Lila.

Lila: Thank you!

Me: I have a screen shot of it here...

Me: Where was it filmed?

Lila: Valley Of Fire, Nevada.

Me: Did your feet get cut up from walking over those rocks? Look at this!

Lila: Haha. Pretty much, yeah. It was one of many painful factors of shooting that video. Very perceptive of you.

Me: Thanks. How long did it take to film? It looked like it was hard work.

Lila: We shot it over the period of 2-3 days. I can't remember right now. But it was amazing.

Me: You make some amazing videos, Lila. Do you like making videos and being filmed?

Lila: I LOVE making videos. I'm okay with being filmed... I love making art, and I'll do anything for that... if it means being in front of a camera I'll do that.

Me: Your music always has an amazing drum sound. You must like drums a lot, am I right?

Lila: Thank you, yes I am a HUGE drum lover.

Me: When you write, do you write the lyrics first or music?

Lila: It's always changing! Usually music first though.

Me: Do you write on guitar or keyboards?

Lila: Both!

Me: Tell me about your friend Daniel Garcia. He's in the band, and works with you on your music. When did you first meet him and his long have you known him?

Lila: Yes, Daniel is amazing. We met about 3.5 years ago. We were just close friends for a while before working together. We started working together about 2.5 years ago and since then we haven't stopped. We've been a "creation machine." We are both serious get-er done types, and also both infatuated with art and we have both become each others' creative muses in a way so its been quite amazing. I feel very blessed to have worked with him so deeply.

Me: If you could work with anybody, Lila, who would it be?

Lila: Wow. Bjork probably.

Me: I have to ask you about Cadence and Cause. How did that organization and you start to work together?

Lila: I played at a festival in Denver Colorado called UMS, and they were connected to the festival. We made a connection about what they were doing, and because I am such a huge believer in giving back and being of service to the world and those in need, I jumped on the opportunity to donate.

Me: So, what's next for you? Have you started working on your next project yet?

Lila: YES! I have an acoustic album in the works, a side electronic project, and a single which should be going out soon. Also I have a remix album of "WE.ANIMALS." coming out. So yeah... lots! I just want to be making stuff alllll the time!

Me: Cool! Continued success, and good luck in the future. Mention your website and please come back on the Phile soon.

Lila: Thanks soooooooo much!!!

That about does it for this entry of the Phile. Thanks to Laird Jim and of course Lila Rose. The Phile will be back tomorrow with artist Ivan Lovatt. Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.

Not if it pleases me. No, you can't stop me, not if it pleases me. - Graham Parker

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