Thursday, June 3, 2010

Pheaturing Meaghan Smith

Hello, welcome to the Phile, kids. I bet you are glad to be out of school. So, what do you think of the new logo? It will be used all the way through August. I have a lot to fit into this entry, so let's get started. A major airport in Greece has closed because they have a plague of frogs. Too bad it didn’t happen in France — they could have just eaten them. I’d like to let everyone know that you don’t have to worry. I’ve been pumped with music, plugged with cement, and the leaking has stopped. The Gulf oil spill is now the worst spill in U.S. history, so... Congratulations, I guess. Prince of Persia was the big movie for Memorial Day weekend. It’s based on an old Atari game which — how can I put this delicately — sucked. Persia is actually modern-day Iran, whose president has declared that there are no gays in his country. That’s impossible — who plans the parades? The other day was Italian Republic Day. Italians were running through the streets waving their arms — and then they remembered it’s a holiday. I love Italian food. Or as it’s known in Italy, “food.” Roman culture is still with us today. We use Roman numerals, we light Roman candles, we... hide our daughters from Roman Polanski. I am so glad Summer here, and this year it's gonna be the most phantastic summer ever. Anyway, I was so happy when I found a Summer motivational poster.

Speaking of Summer, guess who is on the box for Summer's Eve Douche? You're not gonna believe it.

LOL. 2009 joke!

Dennis Hopper
May 17, 1936 - May 29, 2010
Pop quiz, hotshot. There's a cancer on my prostate. Once the prostate goes above 50mph, the cancer is armed. If it drops below 50, your ex-wife takes all your money. What do you do? What do you do?
Gary Coleman
February 8, 1968 - May 28, 2010
Ah, the intracranial hemorrhage. Those kooky little episodes that doctors sometimes refer to as "different strokes."

The French Assembly passes a resolution bringing decapitation to the common criminal: "Every person condemned to the death penalty shall have his head severed."
Three days after a sailor had been badly injured in a brawl with a group of Hispanics, a mob of 60 servicemen leaves the Los Angeles Naval Reserve Armory and bludgeons anybody wearing a zoot suit. The first two victims are a couple of boys, aged 12 and 13, who were just sitting in the Carmen Theater watching a movie. Thus begins a week-long race riot.
Valerie Solanas, author of the SCUM Manifesto, arrives at the art studio of Andy Warhol and shoots him three times in the torso. Warhol barely survives the attempt on his life. Solanas is later jailed and institutionalized.
Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini dies after 11 days in a hospital, recovering from surgery to stop internal hemorrhaging.
Students throw eggs at South Korean Prime Minister Chung Won Shik. Nobody is injured in the incident at Hankuk University in Seoul.
15-year-old teen idol Brad Renfro is arrested in Knoxville, Tennessee and charged with possession of marijuana and cocaine.
The world's first fatal high-speed rail accident occurs when a train near Eschede, Germany derails and 101 people are killed.

Shrek is feeling domestically tamed, his wild ogre id tamped down, his life a tourist attraction, his roar turned limp and his three monster babies sleeping in between him and Fiona, guaranteeing no Shrek-sex. In the middle of all this weird PG emasculation that no child in the audience will understand enters evil trickster Rumplestiltskin. Little R, still angry that Shrek ruined his earlier takeover bid for the land of Far Far Away, snookers the big green guy into signing a contract that will give him one--and only one--full day of life "the way it used to be." In exchange Shrek owes Rump a day in return. Rumplestiltskin takes the day Shrek was born and returns him to a world where he never existed. He and Donkey are strangers, Puss in Boots is a fat housecat and Fiona is the leader of a literally underground ogre resistance movement. Also there's Jar Jar Binks. Usually by the fourth installment of a franchise whose name doesn't rhyme with Schmarry Schmotter, the needle on the gauge has already sunk down to "E." Now, this series, having truly exhausted its narrative by the end of the second film (still the best one of the bunch), spent its third chapter trying to move in a million distracting directions, doing its best dazzle camouflage act to convince you something was happening. Well, something is happening in part four: they dressed up the first movie in new clothes and 3D and told it again. And the weird part is I didn't mind that much. And I made up the part about Jar Jar Binks. You can breathe again. Except for a few Donkey sing-alongs, all the pop culture riffing is gone. And good riddance to it. The snark and already dated gags that sunk that first film--as well as the bawdy adult lines that made it a harrowing ride for parents who weren't particularly interested in explaining what "Snow White lives with seven guys but she's not easy" meant to their six year olds--has been replaced by an earnestly straightforward heartwarmth. That is, except for the moment when Eddie Murphy calls the Gingerbread Man "cracker." Race humor, everyone!
I don't think this one will be the final chapter. The last one made over $320 million dollars. This one will likely perform similarly. It's not like negative or positive reviews are going to matter. And why wouldn't Mike Myers want to keep cashing checks and coasting on that unScottish Scottish accent? There's no Love Guru 2 on the horizon. You'd do the same thing. I give it a seven and probably won't buy it.

This is the 9th book to be pheatured on the P.P.B.C. It's available on and Kimberly Raiser will be a guest on the Phile in two weeks.

I am so excited about today's guest. She is a singer-songwriter and guitarist. While her independently-recorded debut album, "The Cricket's Orchestra" was picked up by Sire Records/Warner Music Canada and released in early 2010, she received a great deal of exposure by contributing a cover of alternative rock group Pixies' "Here Comes Your Man" to the soundtrack of 2009's (500) Days of Summer. On June 27th and 28th she'll be playing at the Jazz Fest in Montral. Please welcome to the Phile... the beautiful Meaghan Smith!

Me: Hello, Meaghan, how are you? Are you on tour right now?

Meaghan: Hey! I'm good.

Me: I have to kiss ass and be honest, your are my favorite female singer right now. Even more then Kelly Clarkson, and I love Kelly Clarkson.

Meaghan: Wow! Thanks so much! Kelly can sure write a hit and rip it up. Thanks for the compliment:)

Me: I read that you draw as well as sing. I draw as well as write blogs. What kind of stuff do you draw?

Meaghan: I love drawing people. I find them the most interesting when it comes to subjects.

Me: Have you ever played Florida? Are you going to come down here?

Meaghan: Oh, I would LOVE to come to Florida! It's freezing cold up here!! Or maybe that's just the flu. No, I'm pretty sure it's the snow on the ground. :)

Me: You play an instrument on stage called an omnichord, right? What is that exactly? Did I spell it right?

Meaghan: You did spell it right. An Omnichord is basically like an auto harp from the 1980's.

Me: Do you play any other instruments?

Meaghan: I also play guitar.

Me: Who is in your band, Meaghan?

Meaghan: My husband Jason Mingo plays guitar and our friend Austin Nicholson plays upright bass. Hopefully we'll get more people involved, like a drummer, soon!

Me: Let's talk about your album called "The Cricket's Orchestra". Is that your first album?

Meaghan: This is my first full length album! I'm so excited about it! Right now I have an EP called "The Cricket's Quartet" which has four songs off the album and four videos too!

Me: Where does the name come from, "The Cricket's Orchestra"?

Meaghan: "The Cricket's Orchestra" is a line from my song called "Five More Minutes". I felt like it really summed up the vibe of the album which is very warm, summery and orchestral.

Me: I downloaded all your music as well as your videos off iTunes. What is your favorite video and who comes up with the concepts? They are all so different and clever.

Meaghan: Thanks! Again, I'm so glad you enjoy. I worked with the director of the videos to come up with the concept. It really helps when you work with such talented people! It's hard to pick a favorite video.... But I love the animated bird in "I Know", I loved having a love affair with a broom in "If You Asked Me", I love the animated Koala bear in "A Little Love", and it was so fun to be kidnapped by a swarm of fireflies and carried away in "Drifted Apart". They were all so fun!

Me: I love that you put animation into them, especially "A Little Love." Do you love old cartoons?

Meaghan: I totally do! I worked as an animator before and some of my favorite shows are those old Disney pieces. I love the rubber hose style and the organic artform that was.

Me: Are you planning any more videos?

Meaghan: Not right away, I've got four videos out there right now and another one coming out with the album with a song named Poor, so I think I'm good for videos for now!

Me: What is your favorite one you did and would you like to act?

Meaghan: I really enjoyed doing them all and would like to try acting.

Me: Some of your music has been in TV shows, right? What shows and is that thrilling for you?

Meaghan: I've had a few songs in "One Tree Hill" and also "Grey's Anatomy". It was so super cool to hear my songs on these shows! It was totally surreal!

Me: You signed to Nettwerk management who also managed the Barenaked Ladies. Are you fans of them? Have you met them yet?

Meaghan: I am fans of them but I haven't met them. Nettwerk also manages Sarah McLaughlan who I'm a big fan of. I've met her a few times and that was totally exciting!

Me: Who else do you listen to, Meaghan?

Meaghan: My play list changes constantly but recently I've been listening to Leon Redbone, the new Bird and Bee album and Coldplay. Still. Yes, I love that album!

Me: Do you have a website? If so, go ahead and plug it, my dear.

Meaghan: I will! I'm also on Twitter, Myspace, and Facebook.

Me: I wish you luck and hope I can interview you again one day. Was this fun?

Meaghan: Totally! Thanks very much for reaching out!

That's it for another great entry of the Phile. Thanks for reading. Thanks also to Meaghan Smith and Wikipedia and Ron Mena for the phantastic new logo. Next week it's Ricky Rayne Mebi, guitarist for the band The Brian Jones Massacre. Spread the word, not the turd, and don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye love you bye.

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