Size Matters Not

Hello, and welcome. Working at Star Wars Weekends I was led to the dark side. But that's okay, I had a flashlight. A half grizzly and half polar bear has been discovered. Scientists say that it is amazing that these two would mate. That’s the magic of eHarmony.com! These bears matched on 29 areas of compatibility. You know what they say – once you go grizzly you never go back. So it’s a half polar bear and half grizzly. Does that make it a "prizzly"? Earlier this week the capitol building Washington, D.C. was on lockdown because someone heard gunshots from the parking lot. When the capitol police heard this they all said the same thing, "Cheney!” The federal government is going to end the 3% tax it levies on all long-distance phone calls. The tax was first imposed in 1898 to pay for the Spanish-American war. It took 108 years to pay. When are we going to finish the War in Iraq? When is that gonna be paid for?Mexican President Vicente Fox is in the United States this week. He says he came here so he could speak directly to the Mexican people. One on one. And it looks like scientists have confirmed they found the remains of Christopher Columbus, in a cathedral in Spain. As you know Columbus discovered America in 1492 looking for a western route to China and India. Do you know why he was looking for western route? This is true. To avoid Islamic extremists. Well thank God that problem is gone. So, thos weekend was Gay Weekend at Disney. The guest of honor was Lightning McQueen from Cars.

SEARCH ENGINE

http://www.youthink.com/quiz.asp?action=take&quiz_id=1602 Apparently I am 'The Simpsons'. Could be worse, I could been 'Family Matters'.

CREATIVE TISSUE BOXES

Ever get the feeling I am running out of ideas?

CANNED LAUGHTER

Three Italian nuns die and go to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, they are met by St. Peter. He says, "Sisters, you all led such exemplary lives that the Lord is granting you six months to go back to earth and be anyone you wish to be. The first nun says, "I want to be Sophia Loren;" and *poof* she's gone. The second says, "I want to be Madonna and *poof* she's gone. The third says, "I want to be Sara Pipalini.."

St. Peter looks perplexed. "Who?" he ask. "Sara Pipalini;" replies the nun. St. Peter shakes his head and says, "I'm sorry, but that name just doesn't ring a bell." The nun then takes a newspaper out of her habit and hands it to St. Peter. St. Peter reads the paper and starts laughing. He hands it back to her and says. "No sister, the paper says it was the 'Sahara Pipeline' that was laid by 1,400 men in 6 months."

I COME FROM A NATION OF SHOPKEEPERS

A rodent is thought to have got into a skip of rubbish that was taken to Recyclo recycling plant in Flintshire. It survived a giant shredder used to destroy waste such as washing machines and was found in a sorting area with no injuries other than a sore foot. The hamster, named Mike, has been adopted by Liam Bull, 10, whose father Craig works at Recyclo. The hamster's ordeal, which lasted around four minutes, began when it arrived at the plant in Sandycroft, probably aboard one of the many skips of waste which arrive there daily. As well as surviving the giant shredder, Mike passed through a rotating drum and vibrating grids before he was discovered by staff.

SEX TOY OR BABY TOY

This is the answer to last week's question.

 

 

Now, what's the answer to this weeks?

 

SHARPENING AXES

What are the seven seas? Some ancient civilizations used the phrase “seven seas” to describe the bodies of water known at that time. The ancient Romans called the lagoons separated from the open sea near Venice the septem maria or seven seas. Most current sources state that "seven seas" referred to the Indian Ocean, Black Sea, Caspian Sea, Adriatic Sea, Persian Gulf, Mediterranean Sea, and the Red Sea. Not all geographers agree on this list of seven, believing that the seven seas reference will be different depending upon the part of the world and the time period in question. Some geographers point to the Age of Discovery and suggest that the seven seas represent the Atlantic, Pacific, Arctic, and Indian Oceans, as well as the Mediterranean Sea, the Caribbean, and the Gulf of Mexico. Other geographers state that the seven seas were the Mediterranean and Red Seas, Indian Ocean, Persian Gulf, China Sea, and the West and East African Seas. Today we recognize more than 50 seas worldwide. A sea is defined as a division of the ocean which is enclosed or partially enclosed by land. With that said, the Caspian Sea, Dead Sea, and Aral Sea are actually saltwater lakes, because they lack an outlet to the ocean. Conversely, by this definition, the Gulf of Mexico and Hudson Bay are seas. Interesting Sea Facts: The largest sea is the Bering Sea at 876,000 sq. miles or 2,270,000 sq. kilometers. The saltiest sea in the world is the Red Sea with 41 parts of salt per 1,000 parts of water. The warmest sea in the world is the Red Sea, where temperatures range from 68 degrees to 87.8 degrees F depending upon which part you measure. The coldest seas are found near the poles such as the Greenland, Barents, Beaufort, Kara, Laptev and East Siberian Seas found near the north pole and Weddell and Ross Seas found in the south poles. The Baltic Sea is also considered one of the coldest seas. Depending upon the amount of salt in the water, sea water freezes at about 28 degrees F. High salt content lowers the temperature for freezing and low salt content raises the temperature for freezing.

MOVIE BUZZ

Marvel's Plan For World Domination: X4: Not gonna happen. Just be happy with the Wolverine spinoff and the Magneto prequel. Fantastic Four 2: It'll suffer from sequel-villain overload, with Galactus, Silver Surfer and Dr. Doom. Iron Man: He won't be a booze-soaked souse. Because deviating from the comics makes the fanboys so happy. Don't call it Hulk 2: It's The Incredible Hulk,and it'll be about Bruce trying to ditch the green giant. Didn't the box-office take from the first one already accomplish that?

Snakes On A Plane: Sure, the teaser playing with X3 and the new website are mildly amusing. But SoaP's not gonna be so bad it's good. It's gonna be just plain bad. Snakes on a plane might be funny for 15 seconds. But an hour and a half? It'll wear out its welcome faster than a bad SNL sketch.

Superman Returns: The fourth trailer is flat-out awesome. In fact, each successive trailer has been more awesome than the last by an awesome factor of, like, 10. If there's a fifth trailer, it will enter previously uncharted waters of mind-blowing awesomeness.

Spider-Man 3 Peter Parker looks like absolute hell in these behind-the-scenes photos. Maybe it's because his alter ego is spending too much time saving Gwen Stacy.

The Transformers: From Michael Bay's blog: "Friday we shot two CV-22's (Ospreys). They fly like aliens dropping out of the sky. I've anticipated leaks for months, so I keep the only shooting script in my computer. Nobody has it, not even actors get a full script." He adds, "In fact, who needs a script? We didn't have one on The Island, and look how well that turned out."

Ghost Rider: The teaser reveals exactly why this movie has been delayed forever: It's unintentionally hilarious. It earns points, though, for homoerotic subtext — flaming, leather-clad dude on a chopper. Nice.

My Super Ex-Girlfriend: This trailer fills me with hate. More so.

Angels and Demons Vs. Indy 4: Steven Spielberg might be in Australia shooting Indy 4. So, no, there's no way he's directing the next Da Vinci Code movie. Unless he clones himself. Hmm … that's just crazy enough to work.

Dukes of Hazzard 2: Here's something that'll make you feel old(er) and (more) out of touch: They might replace Jessica Simpson in the DVD prequel with that blonde chick from Laguna Beach. I've never even seen that show. I'm pretty sure it's on MTV, which I believe used to play music videos.

Southland Tales: It's got The Rock, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Justin Timberlake, Seann William Scott, Mandy Moore and a ton of other funny people in the cast, but studios won't touch it unless Richard Kelly cuts an hour off the running time. Hmm — either the suits don't get the director's "vision," or the movie just sucks.

Cannes Film Festival: A bunch of stuff happened at Cannes last week, but nobody outside of Los Angeles or France cares.

And now my review for X-Men: The Last Stand. Just in time for Gay Pride month, the X-Men return to do that giant, blockbuster, "allegory about the persecution of homosexuals" thing. Wolverine alone looks like every guy you'll ever see in a leather bar, plus or minus a few razor-sharp fingers.  had low expectations. It is a Brett Ratner movie, after all. But he's not bad with action sequences, and the ones here make you forget that he made Red Dragon and After the Sunset. It's the first halfway decent summer movie so far. It's only the fourth one, parading after M: I-3, Poseidon and Da Vinci. And Ihaven't seen any of those. Of special interest to followers of the comic book is the post-credits scene. Stay until the very end to check it out. Anyway, it was the best X-Men movie out of all three, and a lot of surprises. I am a big fan of the comic book Ultimate X-Men and this one had a few cameo's that made me happy, but no Gambit. I give this movie a 10. Incidentally, Logan liked it, but was scared at some parts. And for some crazy reason, he does not want to see Superman Returns!

Well, that's about it. Check out the webshots page as I posted new pics. I will leave you with a random pic. Spread the word and not the turd.