Hey, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Monday... it's Columbus Day apparently. The horror of a deadly virus being brought into America from overseas reminded me to wish you a Happy Columbus Day. A California woman who claimed to have mental health issues was filmed throwing a puppy at a black man who was filming her as she accosted him with her small, innocent weapon/victim. A trending Instagram video shows a tense, bizarre verbal altercation between a white woman holding a puppy and a man whom she confronted for reasons that are not clear. After a quick back and forth the woman, who appears to be intoxicated, throws a puppy at the man. The poor puppy immediately squeals in pain and fear as soon as it hits the man. The man then picks up the puppy and comforts it while still filming the altercation. The woman then accuses the man of stealing her dog. The man, who begins to retreat to protect the dog, accuses the woman of being deranged and committing animal cruelty while the oblivious woman asks, “Did you just steal my dog?” The man threatened to call law enforcement. The woman wasn’t quite done after the first video. She followed the man to his car and began to rant about the Illuminati, the Clintons and a number of other random topics. Though the altercation and most of all the puppy throw was disturbing, the good news is that the puppy is safe and sound now. The man in the video followed up on Instagram showing the puppy with new, much nice owners. He wrote on Instagram...
A city worker in Michigan tasked with removing signs that violated city code had his hand badly injured by a yard sign supporting the reelection campaign of Republican President Donald Trump against Democrat and former Vice President Joe Biden. The sign was booby-trapped with razor blades that were glued to the bottom of it. The 52-year-old municipal employee of Commerce Township, Michigan (about 40 miles north of Detroit) went to remove the Trump sign because it was 9 feet too close to the road and in violation of a city ordinance that requires all signs to be no closer than 33-feet from the center of the road.
When the man reached down to remove the political sign he felt a pain in his hands, according to the Oakland County Sheriff’s Office. At first, the township worker thought the Trump campaign sign was electrocuted, however, when he looked down he realized that his hands were bleeding badly. After being cut by the Trump-Pence sign the township employee drove himself to the hospital where he received 13 stitches across three fingers. When police questioned the homeowner whose yard the sign was in she claimed that she had previously had several other signs supporting the GOP candidate for the White House stolen from her yard, though all of those were later returned.
She also claimed she had no idea that razor blades were taped to the sign, which would mean either a) she’s lying, or b) there is a lunatic with a bag of razor blades wandering Commerce Township, Michigan and taping them to things.
City officials from the southeast Michigan township have said they may seek legal action for the injuries the booby-trap sign caused their employee, according to local news outlet WDIV.
A Virginia hunter was seriously injured in a black bear attack in a remote area of the state that left him with a softball-sized chunk taken out of his leg.
Sixty-eight-year-old Ronnie Dalton of Carroll County, Virginia was in his tree stand and ready to call it a day on hunting. Dalton, a bow hunter out for deer, then noticed that a nearby deer got spooked by something near him. When he looked down he saw a black bear cub. Dalton thought he might be able to sneak away before the momma black bear showed up but he was wrong.
The momma bear spotted him and charged him within seconds. Dalton attempted to climb back up his tree stand but the bear bit him on the leg and threw him ten feet across the forest. The vicious bite combined with the throw knocked Dalton unconscious. Dalton has said that both friends and experts have told him the bear knocking him unconscious probably saved him from becoming a bear mauling fatality statistic. Had he kept moving the momma bear might have continued to attack until she could’ve been sure he was no longer a threat. This may not have been the case had this been a grizzly bear attack but fortunately for Dalton there aren’t any of those monsters roaming the Virginia backcountry. Dalton, who was without bear spray because he didn’t even think a bear encounter was possible... he told local news that this was the first known bear he’d ever seen in the area... had no way to fight back, other than his bow. But it turns out Dalton was in bear country after all. Fortunately for him when he came to a few moments later the momma bear was already leaving with her cubs.
Dalton was then able to hobble himself a quarter mile back to his house and call 9-1-1.
Now the hunter is on crutches for the foreseeable future with a big chunk of his leg missing.
The attack is especially unexpected Grizzly Bears, black bears are typically afraid of humans. Dalton did what he was supposed to when he first saw the bear and attempted to scare it away with waves and loud noises. The bear’s flight response could not trump her mother’s instincts, however. Should you ever find yourself in Alaska or Yellowstone National Park and face to face with a Grizzly Bear, however, do not wave and scream at it. The National Park Service advises avoiding eye contact and trying to leave as slowly as you can. If the Grizzly gets on top of you curl up in a ball. Never try to outrun a brown bear. You can’t.
A gaggle of female exotic dancers were spotted driving around Kansas City, Missouri, though not quite how one would expect. The strippers weren’t in a car. They were on it. More specifically they were on the pole that was on the car.
The mobile strip club was spotted driving through the Paris of the Plains as bemused onlookers watched and tried to take in the adult entertainment on wheels. In these trying coronavirus times, is this the answer for gentlemen’s clubs and bachelor parties (and the birthday parties of pervs) across the United States? Sure lap dances are off the table but this socially distanced strip show might be our new present. You call some club owner named Greasy Randy and boom: a humvee with a bunch of party strippers shows up in your Overland Park or Olathe cul-de-sac for a topless drive by. This is apropos of absolutely nothing involving this stripper humvee but I have no more words for it. I’m going to give you a little peak behind the curtain here at the Phile. I run SEO reports on all of our stories and make sure to mention some of the more prominent phrases associated with my story.
For whatever reason, one of the phrases for this Kansas City stripper story was “Divorce Parties.” What? Are those a thing? I mean, I guess it’s cool if you’re getting out of a terrible marriage but otherwise maybe don’t let your kids know you’re playing party games to celebrate their family splitting up? Seems weird. Oh, here's a pic of it...
Now for some football talk... Yesterday Dallas Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott suffered a gruesome ankle injury that is surely season-ending. No matter how slice it, it’s a devastating injury for Prescott, who was playing on a 1-year franchise tag in hopes of cashing in on a long term deal and extra devastating for the Cowboys, who lose their starting quarterback.
But Tony Dungy doesn’t think it’s the worst thing in the world.
Prior to the start of tonight’s Sunday Night Football game, the former head coach stated that the Prescott injury could be a “blessing in disguise” for the Cowboys, who could go back to the ground and pound approach with Dak out.
The Cowboys have so much potential, and that’s exactly why disappoint after disappoint hits so hard for fans in Dallas.
The team was booed off the field after a possession that resulted in an interception Sunday AT HOME in Jerry’s world. Yikes. Anyway, they beat the Giants so I'm not happy.
Speaking of football, some teams this year have changed their logos for some reason. Like Kansas City...
Instead of doing this blog thing I should be listening to this album...
This reusable face mask is a great pick for a breast cancer survivor. It says, “faith, hope, and love.” It's pumpkin spice season and some companies are taking it a little bit too fat this year.
Yuck. Keeping up with the youngins and their lingo is tough. Kids these days like to use "emoji," which use small pictures to communicate how they're feeling... kind of like hyroglyphics. When using emoji, it's easy to confuse laugh-crying for just regular-crying, and these boomers and old folks made the unfortunate mistake of using the wrong face at the wrongest possible times.
Sorry for your loss. So, are you on a dating website? You never know what you're gonna find...
So, remember that fly that was on top of Pence's head? Well, here's a closer look at it...
Speaking of Pence...
Melania and Barron Trump with Mike Pence looking back as they remove an illegal immigrant from his home.
If you spot the Mindphuck let me know. While some people are very open with their emotions and details of their personal lives, it's critically important to respect boundaries when someone is giving you all the signs that they're not interested in venting...
Prying into someone's personal life to satisfy your curiosity or desire to gossip is never a considerate move. If someone is suffering through a rough divorce or breakup, a good friend will just let them know they're there to talk and not try to force out all the details, regardless of how juicy they may be. Especially when it comes to acquaintances or people who are in your immediate circle of family and friends, a very important skill of adulthood is being able to read the room. If the vibes are saying, "it's time to chug tequila shots and dance this divorce away," then it's okay to do some playful prying, but if someone is explicitly telling you to stop asking them deeply personal questions, you must listen.
So, when a woman decided to consult the Phile about an argument she got into that ended in her leaving a nosy pregnant woman on the side of the road, I was ready to help.
"Am I wrong for telling a pregnant friend to get out of my car because she was annoying me?
I was having lunch with some friends a few days ago. One of them, "Carol," isn't really my friend. She's a friend of my friend. I never liked her. She's entitled and always criticizes everything she doesn't approve of. Anyway I left early because I had to pick up my son at his grandparents', and Carol, who's 5 months pregnant, asked if I could give her a ride since she lives in the same neighborhood and I said yes.
I recently divorced my husband because I found out he had been cheating on me. On our way to my ex parents', Carol started questioning me as to why I decided to divorce my ex since she has known him for years and he's a nice man. I politely told her I really didn't want to talk about it because I'm still heartbroken and extremely angry and I get emotional just thinking about it. But she started accusing me of not giving him enough attention as his wife which, according to her, was probably the reason why he cheated. She also said that me going to work instead of being a stay-home wife 24/7 was the biggest mistake I had ever done in my life. I told her its none of her business. And she called me a frigid bitch.
I lost it. I was fuming. I pulled over in front of a department store and told her to get the fuck out of my car and then left her there. I was crying all the way to my ex parents' house. That night I slept through my phone going off and found out that my ex parents and my friends were angry with me for leaving a pregnant woman on the side of the road. What if bad things happened? I have to say I felt a bit guilty. But she was pushing my buttons and wouldn't listen when I politely asked her to stop. Besides, I didn't just leave her anywhere unsafe for a pregnant woman to be. I left her somewhere she could catch a cab. Am I wrong? You told her to shut up. She didn’t.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. You were right, it really WASN’T any of her business. It’s really actually invasive because she’s just an acquaintance of yours and not a friend. Even if she was a friend, she didn’t respect your boundaries when you said you didn’t want to talk about it. If you live in a glass house, don’t throw stones. You don’t owe her anything, pregnant or not. If she doesn’t have the decency to treat you properly, she doesn’t deserve a favor from you. No one is entitled to know about your feelings nor entitled to anything that doesn’t directly involve them. So, there you have it!
You were not in the wrong at all, and being pregnant doesn't give your "friend" an excuse to be rude, nosy, and judgemental especially when you were doing a favor for her by driving her home. Good luck, everyone! If you have a problem you want me to help with then email me at thepeverettphile@gmail.com.
Now from the home office in Port Jefferson, New York here is...
Top Phive Things Said By Parents This Past Weekend
5. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me between two and fifty tomes and you're my 5-year-old getting out of bed at night.
4. Just telling my son he can speak again because his 4-year-old sister told he can't talk for 700 years and he believed her.
3. She was rare, like an item of kids' clothing in the hamper that's not inside out.
2. The greatest part about being trapped in a car for six hours with my kids is that I have nowhere to hide when they keep asking me questions like what it feels like for people in Australia to walk because they're upside down.
And the number one thing said by a parent this past weekend is...
1. My three-year-old put on her black dress with ghost kitties and demanded we put on Nightmare Before Christmas. Its Halloween whenever she damn well says it is.
During childhood, we are told that jokes about the genital areas are adult content, but once we become adults, these jokes are considered “childish.”
I have no fucking idea. I think I'm gonna be sick. Hahaha. Okay, let's take a live look at Port Jefferson, shall we?
This man is lucky he didn’t get shot.
Hernando County Sheriff’s Office found 36-year-old Johnathan Lee Rossmoine in a teenage girl’s bedroom in Spring Hill, Florida. Hernando County Sheriff’s deputies were called by the teen’s parents, who reported that they had found him hiding in their teen’s closet. And what makes finding a grown man in your child’s bedroom even more horrifying is when your child tells the officers that he is her boyfriend. Apparently, she and Rossmoine had been talking on an online chat app for almost two years. She had first told him that she was 18-years-old, but right before they met in person, she revealed to him that she was only a 15-year-old. Nevertheless, Rossmoine had been “living off and on” in her bedroom since mid-August, and the Louisiana man hid in the Florida teenager’s closet whenever her parents were home.
Rossmoine disclosed to the deputies that he has been in Hernando County for about five weeks now, having multiple sexual encounters with the teenage girl. He also admitted to driving from Louisiana to the girl’s Spring Hill home to have sex with her in the teen’s bedroom. Police say that he also admitted that he and the girl also had “numerous sexual encounters” in his van, parked near the house.
Rossmoine was charged with “four counts of lewd and lascivious behavior with a victim between the age of 12 and 16, and one count of obscene communication-travel to meet after use of a computer to lure child,” as he now sits in Hernando County jail. He was held initially without bond, but now has a $25,000 bond for the sex charges and sex crimes.
I feel for the parents of the teenager. You know how horrifying it must have been to find a disgusting pervert inside that Florida teen’s room?
Whitey Ford
October 21st, 1928 — October 8th, 2020
The Chairman is as stiff as a board.
The 137th book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club is...
Lamont will be on the Phile tomorrow. Now for some...
Phact 1. Scientists didn’t discover a single male blanket octopus until 2002 because they were looking at the wrong magnitude. Females can be up to 40,000 times more massive than males, the largest gender size discrepancy in the animal kingdom.
Phact 2. Matthias Buchinger was born without arms or lower legs and was a famous magician, illustrator, and master engraver, and had 14 children by 8 wives with up to 70 mistresses.
Phact 3. Many kinds of toothpaste contain small plastic beads which may lodge in the gums, are likely harmful to the environment, and are included in toothpaste for decorative purposes only.
Phact 4. Abercrombie & Fitch was originally a sporting goods store best known for their expensive shotguns. Ernest Hemingway killed himself with his favorite shotgun, which was purchased from Abercrombie & Fitch.
Phact 5. When the bubonic plague struck London in 1665, one of the “cures” the plague doctors prescribed was fart jar. To combat the plague people would literally pass gas into a jar, then take a whiff.
Today's guest is an American rock and roll musician and songwriter, best known for her work in the Go-Go's in the 1980s, including writing "We Got the Beat." They have a new single out called "Club Zero" and a new documentary on Showtime called The Go-Go's. Please welcome to the Phile... Charlotte Caffey.
Me: Hey, Charlotte, I am a huge Go-Go's fan since I was a kid. I'm so excited you are here! How are you?
Charlotte: Hi, Jason, I'm great. How are you?
Me: I am fantastic! So, why a documentary now after all these years?
Charlotte: We wanted to set the record straight about our own story.
Me: So, what do you think the biggest misconception is of the Go-Go's?
Charlotte: First of all people did not know we were from punk rock. So many people had no idea that's where we started.
Me: I knew that. Why don't you think other people knew that?
Charlotte: When we started becoming popular and selling record and all that stuff that happened there was a media thing that dubbed us as "America's sweethearts," right?
Me: You weren't? Hahaha.
Charlotte: Certainly not. We called ourselves "America's sweethearts from hell." Then they're hearing this poppy music but the lyrics that were being written by Jane Wiedlin on that first record, oh my god, there's a dark side to them, a deep side to them. I think people saw us in a certain light and with our story we are happy to tell it.
Me: Was there any hesitation in that?
Charlotte: We said one thing before we started doing this we all wanted to be 100% honest. It's a cool story, why not tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
Me: So, how did you become a member of the Go-Go's?
Charlotte: I was performing in a band in the L.A. punk scene called the Eyes when two women approached me about doing their band.
Me: How was that moment for you?
Charlotte: I was playing with my band, opening for the Jam and and the Dickies at the Starwood, I actually know te date... April 14th, 1978. I still have a little flyer from that. I have a lot of archival stuff. Back in those days we were playing two sets a night, so in-between the first set and the second set I was sitting there trying to write a setlist for the second set and I literally see these two sets of feet walking up, like high heels and ripped fishnets, garbage bags cringed at the waist, as I'm looking up purple hair, that was Belinda. She sported that trash bag really well. She looked amazing in it. Margo was the other girl that was there and they said to me, "Hey, Charlotte, we're starting an all girl band, would you like to join it?" I was like, "Hell yeah! Of course!" How was I going to say no? Then they asked me do I play lead guitar and I said yes and of course I didn't. I never played lead guitar before so I kind of lied. That's how it started. It was a really incredible moment and I remember as if it was yesterday.
Me: So, what did the punk scene do for you in those days?
Charlotte: That whole scene was all about self expression. It was very inclusive, we had freaks, we just had every person under the sun. No one was turned away. We ended up with 50 or 60 kids, it was just a really, really open time for me coming from a Catholic upbringing. All that stuff that's very oppressive. So it was really exciting just to be part of this artistic movement.
Me: What do you remember about playing those Go-Go's shows early on?
Charlotte: Man, it was so outrageous.
Me: Tell the readers about playing somewhere like the Mask.
Charlotte: Okay, at the Mask we walked down these stairs to the basement and it's all cement, so when we're playing with loud amps and drums sound bounces off every surface. Even thought their were people jammed in there so it absorbed some of the sound, it was really loud. But in evidently every weekend when we would have shows the toilet would break or something would flood. It was one of he best times of my life because it was outrageous and completely outside of my life experience of my life at that point. I loved every second of it.
Me: What kinda background did you have before this?
Charlotte: I had this classical training background. I was studying Johann Strauss and studying classical piano, then here I was in his concrete floor crazy basement.
Me: So, how did you go from classical piano to punk music?
Charlotte: I had to throw out all that theory.
Me: How was it when you started playing guitar?
Charlotte: First of all I didn't know what I was doing on guitar. I had to kind of figure that out which was actually a good thing because I went back to zero and just started learning and figuring it out. I came up with my own thing that I kind of do on the guitar. It was really just super fun. It was just a blast.
Me: You wrote "We Got the Beat" that changed everything for all of you. What was it like writing that song?
Charlotte: Well, I think we had a break in our work which was unusual because we were working non stop for years. I was home and I was thinking I really want to write a song today. So all day long I kept trying to write one. Now for me as a songwriter usually that never works when I'm trying to write something. I wanted to write something sort of uptempo, kind of with a beat, kind of with a thing. I don't know, something was swirling around in my brain and then I just gave up. Then around midnight this idea came to my mind and I got my little cassette tape player back then and sang into it this whole idea and that's "We Got the Beat." The whole idea came out, the idea for the title, everything was just there and it took me minutes. It was very bizarre.
Me: Can you believe that song changed your life?
Charlotte: That's the thing, in the creative world, or the writing world, if I'm open and present for that moment and that idea comes that's great. If I'm not, I could miss it.
Me: When you showed it to the band what did they think?
Charlotte: I was scared to show them the song first of.
Me: Why is that?
Charlotte: Well, I had trepidation because of rejection. I don't want to be rejected. I felt really strongly about this song, I think it was really good and it could be really fun to play. I had no idea it would become a massive hit. It was clearly a pop song and clearly unlike anything we were doing but when I showed it to them it was really a magical moment, everyone loved it. It was just that, it wasn't being scared like trembling, it was more like god, I hope these girls love it and they did.
Me: What was it like going from this cool underground band to this big popular pop band? I love this cover from Rolling Stone by the way...
Charlotte: It's really bizarre, people started treating us differently. Or they disowned us because we "sold out." I loved our punk rock roots and I loved our years doing that but I was okay moving on. And people saying we sold out, I was like that's their opinion, whatever. Personally it was overwhelming.
Me: Why was that?
Charlotte: Because the sheer amount of work and also people adoring me was weird. It's just weird. We were working non-stop, 24/7 for I don't know how long and partying at the same time. I have to just contribute it to the fact that we were young. I don't know how to do that anymore.
Me: Did you do drugs, Charlotte?
Charlotte: Yeah, I was doing heroin and hiding it from my bandmates.
Me: How did you manage to lead that double life at that time?
Charlotte: Well, part of it was at that time in the early 80s there was no resources for drug addiction really. There were very few, at least in the United States. There was the Berry Ford Center two hours from my house. The thing is I didn't have any information. I started doing drugs very innocently like this would be fun, it's the weekend, let's do this. I didn't know that I had a pre-disposition, in my family there's alcoholism and drug addiction and I didn't understand any of that. Now I understand all of it. I loved through it and I was able to get sober. I have been sober for 35 years as of February.
Me: Congrats. So, this year never made you want to do it again? Hahaha.
Charlotte: No, I never want to go back to that. It was a very tortured existence.
Me: Is it weird talking about it now?
Charlotte: I'm very open about it because I feel that if anyone is listening they are struggling with this, there is a way. I didn't have the information but once I got that information I followed that road and I never looked back. I worked very hard too change and learn about addiction and all that. It's a very serious disease and I'm one of the lucky ones I guess.
Me: Charlotte, stop me if I'm asking too much about this...
Charlotte: You can ask me anything, Jason. Ask away.
Me: Thanks. So, is it true you were kicked out of Ozzy Osborne's dressing room once? If so what happened?
Charlotte: Well, I was completely high out of my mind. Who wants that? I've seen that. I know what it looks like looking at it. Of course, I would kick somebody out of our dressing room if that was going on. I'm sure I was so gone. Who knows? I think too possible at the time Ozzy was sober and who wants a completely high person drunk out of their mind, whatever the situation was, who wants that? I don't blame them, I thank them. I remember Sharon being there and I thank them from the bottom of my heart for doing that.
Me: Really? Why is that?
Charlotte: Because two weeks after that I checked myself into a rehab and when I got back home that's where I started. I found a little one that was close to me and I went there and playing in front of 250,000 people at the Rock in Rio where we were with Ozzy and Queen and the B-52's, it was an amazing concert. And going into a rehab that had 18 people.
Me: Wow. What was that like?
Charlotte: It was a culture shock, that was seven years later when I started being addicted at that point. It was a culture shock but the most important thing that I've ever done in my life pretty much. It saved my life.
Me: With the debut album being so big, did you realize what you were doing would open doors for women in the future?
Charlotte: We were hoping. We were thinking we are busting down the doors, come on, gals, let's go! I think yes, over the years we had many people come up and say they learned to play guitar, girls and guys. Being in a band is being in a band. No matter that gender they are, its still that work and everything. Yes, it busted down doors for girls, and yes girls could see themselves playing because we were like kind of normal girls, we weren't super models, we were just normal. Kind of looking girls and girls could relate so I think it did do that but we expected a rash of girl bands sprouting up and that didn't really happen which we were surprised about but then later on it did. Kathleen Hanna, I adore her, when she was interviewed in our documentary she talked about how we influenced her life and that was really meaningful to me.
Me: I was so excited to see the Go-Go's at the Hard Rock here in Orlando a few years ago and again at Epcot for Food and Wine. Now you girls have a new single called "Club Zero," which is cool. If you could go back in time and visit young Charlotte what advice would you give her?
Charlotte: People ask me what would I go back and change and I'm like I'm the person I am today because of everything I went through, including becoming a drug addict. I can't say I would change anything. Everything I did leads me to right here so I don't know if I would give young Charlotte different advice.
Me: Charlotte, thanks so much for being on the Phile. This was a huge thrill, I'm a big fan. Please come back again and tell the other girls to come on.
Charlotte: Thanks, Jason, I will.
That about does it for this entry of the Phile. Thanks to Charlotte for a great interview. The Phile will be back tomorrow with songwriting legend Lamont Dozier. Spread the word, not the turd or virus. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye. Mask it or casket. Kiss your brain.
I don't want you, cook my bread, I don't want you, make my bed, I don't want your money too, I just want to make love to you. - Willie Dixon
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