Monday, July 1, 2019

Pheaturing Roger Daltrey



Rabbit. Hey, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Monday. It's summer! Pray for Florida... ain't nothing wrong, it's just hot as fuck outside. A mosquito just flew past my ear and whispered, "We back, bitch." Man, I have so much to talk about...
Joe Biden was the frontrunner to win the Democratic nomination to get cyberbullied by Trump until this week, when a sub-optimal debate performance had donors bailing and people wondering if Uncle Joe was really more of a racist grandpa. The president is an alleged rapist and proud white supremacist, so naturally every bucket of pee looks golden text to a stinky turd, but Biden's campaign is without-a-doubt floundering with its case that Biden is the guy to take Trump on. In the most talked-about moment from last Thursday's debate, Senator Kamala Harris peeled off his skin and then burned him alive. "As the only black person on this stage, I would like to speak on the issue of race," Harris began. In what is likely to be among the most-played soundbites of the next year, Harris addressed Biden directly on his opposition to federally-mandated busing to integrate public schools. "Vice President Biden, I do not believe you are a racist, and I agree with you when you commit yourself to the importance of finding common ground. But I also believe, and it's personal... and I was actually very... it was hurtful to hear you talk about the reputations of two United States senators who built their reputations and career on the segregation of race in this country. And it was not only that, but you also worked with them to oppose busing. And, you know, there was a little girl in California who was part of the second class to integrate her public schools, and she was bussed to school every day. And that little girl was me." He must have known he was bombing, because he decided to yield his time after a little back-and-forth. In insisting that he was not, in fact, racist, Biden sure sounded pretty racist. Speaking at a conference organized by civil rights activist Jesse Jackson, Biden argued that he's so non-racist, he just makes assumptions based on sweatshirts. That's right, in trying to prove his racial justice chops, he decided to use stereotypes and slurs, saying, "We have to recognize that kid wearing the hoodie, may very well be the next poet laureate, and not a gangbanger." Excuse me, sir, what is the problem with hoodies? It's impossible to mention hoodies in a racial justice context without immediately thinking of Trayvon Martin, who was shot by George Zimmerman in the street by wearing that "suspicious" outfit. In a sign of solidarity after Martin was murdered, the hoodie became a symbol of injustice and the Black Lives Matter movement in 2012. Biden can't be expected to be familiar of the main events of the 2012... he was only vice president at the time. Also, "gangbanger"? What is this, West Side Story? Biden was also humiliated on matters less important than civil rights. Eric Swalwell (who? Doesn't matter) called him old right to his face. He also got a taste of his own medicine when he found out how much it sucks to have someone invade your personal space. Maybe it's not enough of a campaign to be Barack Obama's friend? The thirst is real.
The author Marianne Williamson immediately took the Democratic debate stage by fire on Thursday night with her unconventional oeuvre, and the pressing sense that she was about to float off into the night sky on a dragon or a magic carpet. Williamson, who has previously penned such books as The Law of Divine Compensation and Healing The Soul of America, immediately became a meme on Twitter for saying presidential candidates need to stop focusing on plans, and start focusing on the power of love. "Trump is not going to be beaten by someone who just has plans, he's going to be beaten by someone who has an idea what this man has done. This man has reached into the American people and harnessed fear for political gain." She then went on to directly address "Mr. President" and say that "only love can cast that out" and she is personally prepared to cast it out. Williamson also, at one point said that if she was elected she would immediately call the Prime Minister of New Zealand Jacinda Ardern and say "girl, you are so on" before getting tips on making America a safer and better place to raise children. Needless to say, she has hit the Internet by storm and people are beyond obsessed with her GOOP meets motivational speaker meets ayahuasca dealer energy. One of the most beautiful meme-ifications of Williamson so far is a viral thread that merely posts a series of her old tweets, all of which speak for themselves. These tweets truly show Williamson's spiritual, philosophical and political range. In one gorgeous tweet, she says all we need to understand America is another viewing of Avatar. She is a strong believer in reaching collective higher vibrations, and verbally encouraging the grass to grow (at its own pace of course). She also believes in cultivating a loving, symbiotic relationship with the universe. Williamson also has a connection to fellow goddesses and believes humanity shares a collective pregnancy. Truly, the thread of her old tweets travels as far as her love relationship with astral planes. Needless to say, regardless of how far Williamson makes it as a candidate, she has quickly amassed an enormous gaggle of new followers, ready to take in her words, even if we don't know what they mean.
Okay, I have to mention Wednesday's debate... In case you missed it, two of the dudes running for president decided to dust off their Spanish at Wednesday's presidential debate. And everyone's got an opinion on it, including Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Senator Cory Booker and non-senator Beto O'Rourke were the Spanish attempters in question. They answered a chunk of one question each in Spanish. While the Internet had its own reactions, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez headed to "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert" to register her amusement at their skills. She was mostly complimentary, while also deploying expert shade. “I loved it," she said, "because, I represent the Bronx and there was a lot of Spanglish in the building.” She added that the gents' use of the language was "humorous." Then she spoke Spanish herself and piled on some more shade, giving the Spanish translation for "I will not give you an answer to your question." Also, for what it's worth, AOC and Colbert agreed that Warren "knocked it out of the park" at this debate. Reaction to the dudes' Spanish skills has been mixed. Many have accused them of pandering. But the debate took place in Miami and was co-hosted by Telemundo. Also, um... guys? No matter what your Trump-voting uncle says, the U.S. actually doesn't have an official language. Tens of millions of Americans speak Spanish. The U.S. has more Spanish-speakers than Spain! It probably shouldn't be this unusual for us to see Spanish spoken at a political function. Still, many are saying the guys' attempts at Spanish were embarrassing. Brad Polumbo of the Washington Examiner said it was "offensive pandering at its worst." And some couldn't help but notice that the Spanish-language answers were actually a bit flimsy. And the Internet, of course, said it was great meme fodder. Sadly for Booker, his shady side-eye was circulated more than his actual language skills. CNN Politics was kind enough to dig through the trenches of Cory Booker's Twitter account for a little back story... Booker once studied abroad in Ecuador, and this is how he "improved" his Spanish language "abilidad." O'Rourke, meanwhile, has been flexing his Spanish skills for a while now. He once suggested debating Ted Cruz in Spanish, forcing Cruz to admit he speaks one language and one language only: a sort of strangled, high-pitched undertaker's English. Marianne Williamson, the presidential candidate most likely to corner you at a bar asking for your birth time, had jokes.



Columnist E. Jean Carroll accused President Donald Trump of raping her in a Bergdorf Goodman dressing room 23 years ago. The details are graphic and harrowing, and Trump insists that they have never met, though there is a picture of them laughing it up in 1987, years before the alleged attack.


According to Vox, Carroll is the 22nd woman to publicly accuse the president of sexual misconduct, which both indicates that this is a pattern of behavior from a man who publicly brags of grabbing women by the pussy, and that the media is totally bored of this by now. The New York Times covered the accusation in the books section, because accusing the president of rape isn't political news, it's tea for the publishing industry. The story went viral on Twitter on Friday, and by the end of the weekend, most news networks didn't bother bringing it up. The Sunday morning talk shows... everyone's parents' favorite brunch ritual... largely ignored the story, and Carroll is sick of it. Last Monday, Carroll told CNN that she is sick of this vicious cycle of women coming forward, and then being ignored and insulted by the fanboys who think that a president grabbing women by the pussy makes him Alpha. "With all the 16 women who have come forward, it's the same... he denies he, he turns it around, he attacks, and he threatens. Then everybody forgets it, and then the next woman comes along. And I am sick of it," she said. "Think how many women have come forward, nothing happens. The only thing we can do is sit with you, and tell our stories, so that we empower other women to come forward and tell their stories because we have to change this culture of sexual violence."
Canadian cartoonist Michael de Adder (who I will try and get on the Phile) drew a picture of Trump playing golf, and asking if he could play through an area with two dead migrants laying in the water. The image was borrowed from this heartbreaking photo of a drowned father and daughter trying to reach America.



At the time of publishing the artist's tweet had over 6000 likes and almost 10,000 retweets. DeAdder said that because of the Trump cartoon he was fired by the Canadian newspaper he freelanced for. You can see the illustration here...


After allegedly being fired, deAdder wrote on Twitter, "The highs and lows of cartooning. Today I was just let go from all newspapers in New Brunswick." The newspaper had apparently never seen his Trump comics before, although he had been publishing them for some time. Brunswick News, the paper deAdder freelanced for said in response, "This is a false narrative which has emerged carelessly and recklessly on social media. In fact, BNI was not even offered this cartoon by Mr. de Adder. The decision to bring back reader favourite Greg Perry was made long before this cartoon, and negotiations had been ongoing for weeks.” DeAdder later tweeted, "The hardest part in all of this, I have a mother with dimentia in NB who has a hard time remembering her family at times. But she knows her son draws cartoons. Part of her daily routine is to open the @TimesTranscript and see her son's cartoon. A cartoon that won't be there anymore." What are your thoughts? I say he's a good artist...
Instead of doing this blog thing I should be listening to this album...


Haha! Maybe not. If I had a TARDIS I would like to go back and meet John F. Kennedy, but knowing my luck it'll be during the Cuban Missile Crisis and he'll be too busy to chat...


Ever see those people with the cardboard signs on the side of the room that you assume are homeless and begging for money? Well, not all of them are...


I wish we could see her whole face. Ummm... moving on. Do you kids like Hot Pockets? Have you seen the new flavor that's out? If not check it out...


Hmmm... I'll skip. I was thinking of getting a new tattoo but someone had the same idea I had...


Yeesh. I apologize, kids. That's just disgusting! Were your kids in school as clever as the kid that did this?


Hahahahahaha. So, did you know that Trump plays the accordion? No? Here's proof...


Speaking of Trump, a few weeks ago he was in London and I have to say my fellow Londoners sure had some really good anti-Trump signs.


Ha! So, do you love Keanu Reeves? It seems like everybody does. So once again here is...



"Went to see John Wick 3 tonight and this guy happened to be in the audience too!"



If you spot the Mindphuck let me know. So, there's this little girl who seems to get in trouble a lot. For her "punishment" her parents contacted me and said that she should be on the Phile to tell the "world" what she did. So, here for the first time is...


Me: Oh... hi, Awful. That's not you real name, is it? What is your real name?

Awful: Nanya.

Me: Nanya?

Awful: Yeah, you ugly fat bellied, big nosed idiot. Nanya your fucking business.

Me: Oh. Okay, so, how old are you?

Awful: Old enough to know this fucking sucks. Your blog is bullshit.

Me: Maybe... so, what did you do that was so bad that you have to be here?

Awful: It's ridiculous. My sister's ureter broke and she had to get a tube from her kidney, out of her body and to a bag, while said ureter healed. She was pretty ill and was in the hospital for a bit more than a month. Anyways, second night she's back home, I PULLED the tube out of my sister's kidney, requiring her to get an emergency surgery.

Me: Damn! What's your excuse?

Awful: I KNEW doing that would hurt her, but she was getting SO MUCH attention from daddy and mommy since she got home... attention I deserved more.

Me: What did everybody else think?

Awful: They thought that was cute... smh. The crazy part is that my older sister would have never gotten away with something like that, so I don't really get why they spoiled me so much. I know.

Me: I doubt it you're spoiled. Spolied rotten maybe.

Awful: Fuck you, idiot.

Me: Awful, the rudest most asshole kid ever, kids. I need to have a word with her parents.




From Oktoberfest to Wrestlemania! Hey, there's this comedian that thinks he's funny and try to tell jokes... except for he doesn't quite get it. He has some new material he wats to try out so once again please welcome to the Phile...


Me: Hey, Ollie. So, you have some jokes for us?

Ollie: Yeah. Hi, Jason. A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "No, all days are 24 hours long" the man replies, amazed at how uneducated the bartender is.

Me: That is not very funny, Ollie. Try something simpler...

Ollie: Okay. Why didn't Jesus like pizza?

Me: I don't know. Why?

Ollie: Because he didn't exist.

Me: You just alienated half of my readers. Try another.

Ollie: Why did the black man buy three boxes of condoms?

Me: Ummm... I don't know. Why?

Ollie: Because he practices safe sex and they were on sale.

Me: I almost laughed. Damn it. One more, Ollie. Make it good.

Ollie: What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman?

Me: I don't know. what?

Ollie: Well it's not going to happen so I don't see the point in giving this a name.

Me: Ugh. Ollie Tabooger, the guy who doesn't know how to tell a joke, kids.



Counterfeiters 
Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.



The President of the United States responded to a woman accusing him of rape not by denouncing the severity of sexual violence and insisting that it is something that he would never do but by criticizing the accuser's looks and implying that rape is about attraction. Advice columnist E. Jean Carroll described her alleged attack by President Trump in harrowing detail. In an interview with The Hill, Trump said that Carroll is too ugly to rape, “I’ll say it with great respect: Number one, she’s not my type. Number two, it never happened. It never happened, okay?” the president said while seated behind the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office. When Carroll's story went public on Friday, the White House insisted that the two had never even met, even though there is evidence to the contrary. Responding to rape allegations by citing his lack of boner for the victim is a common refrain of Trump's. In 2016, Jessica Leeds accused then-candidate Trump of groping her when they were seated next to each other on an airplane in the 1970s. Trump did his roast comic bit at a rally, insisting that she was also too unattractive to assault. "Yeah, I’m gonna go after her,” he said sarcastically. "Believe me, she would not be my first choice. That I can tell you. You don’t know. That would not be my first choice.” Very comforting to hear that the president's defense isn't "I would never rape anybody," just "I would never rape her." "I'm glad I'm not his type," Carroll said on CNN, before proceeding to describe the attack once again in great detail. At least 21 other women have publicly accused Trump of sexual misconduct or assault. Maybe the preponderence of data will help shed light on what "type" of woman Trump likes to exercise his power over.




Hahaha. And now for something I hope you'll laugh at. This one is for you, Rich.


After a round of golf, four ladies sat around the club house, chatting. Seeing the ladies, the Pro approached them and asked, "How did your game go?" The first lady, a brunette, said she had a good round... making the comment that she actually had 25 riders. The Pro was a bit perplexed not knowing what a "rider" was. The second was a blonde lady who quickly chimed in and said that she had a very good round as well with 16 riders. The third lady then said that her round was average and that she only had 10 riders. The fourth lady admitted that she played the worst round of the day and that she only had 2 riders all day long. The Pro was completely confused not knowing what the term "rider" meant. But, because he didn't want to look dumb, he made a quick polite remark, wished the ladies well and then left. He then approached the bartender and asked, "Hey, can you tell me what these ladies are talking about when they refer to 'riders'?" The bartender simply smiled and said, "A 'rider" is when you hit a shot long enough to ride on the golf cart to your ball.



I'm soooo excited!! Today's guest is an English singer and actor. He is a founder member and lead singer of the rock band the Who, and the author of Thanks a Lot Mr. Kibblewhite: My Story, the 100th book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club. Please welcome to the Phile the great... Roger Daltrey!



Me: Hey, Roger, welcome to the Phile! I am so excited to have you here. How are you?

Roger: I'm great, Jason, thank you.

Me: Okay, so your book, which is the 100th book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club, Thanks a Lot Mr. Kibblewhite: My Story, who is Mr. Kibblewhite?

Roger: Mr. Kibblewhite is the headmaster who kicked me out of school when I was just 15-years-old.

Me: Okay, so, what was your childhood like then, Roger?

Roger: I was always working class. Both John and Pete were kind of middle class. The English class sociality, you have to live there to understand it. In America there isn't. You either have money or you haven't got money. Money could buy you up the ladder of American society. In England that isn't the case. If you're working class with or without money you're still working class. In those days working class was kind of looked down upon by the middle classes and certainly the upper classes.

Me: I was born in Balham, London. Gateway to the south, Roger. Where in London are you from? 

Roger: East Acton, west London.

Me: In the book you tell the story how Pete Townshend was inspired to write "My Generation" by the Queen Mother. What is that story?

Roger: Pete lived in Belgravia which is just kind of butts onto the gardens of Buckingham Palace. Pete in those days used to drive around in an old hearse and the Queen Mother used to drive by where he used to park it on the street and objected to it and had it removed. Pete wrote "My Generation" in complete anger. What a great song it was, and it still is. It speaks for every generation coming through.

Me: You were living in the tour van at this point, am I right?

Roger: Yeah, about a six to eight month period of my life when I left my wife. I married very young and just before my 20th birthday. I tried to make that marriage work but just couldn't do it. The dream of making it in a rock band was all I ever wanted to be was a great singer. That was all important to me and I really felt I tried to make the marriage work. It just didn't. I was too young. I thought if I could make this dream work I could do better for everybody. And I did. In hindsight I did. It was a very difficult time for me. I let my wife and my young child in one room you would in America call a "project" and then lived in the van. 

Me: I couldn't do any of that. Did you like living in the van?

Roger: I had a great time in the van. It was freedom and the van was kind of moving all the time which when I was doing that gave me an incredible growth rate. I grew up very, very quickly.

Me: When the kids in the 60s and your band started to take drugs you didn't really, right?

Roger: In the early 60s there was this new fashion of a group coming through. Everyone was fashioned conscious in the 60s. They were the first teenagers to have money to spend really. It was spent on clothes and this mod movement really became this vocal point and got much into these all night clubs, and just stay up all night. They used to take these little helpers called Purple Hearts, which was amphetamine. I tried them a couple of times. We used to do two shows a night. Sometimes at weekends we'd play from 8 to 11 and then 2 to 4 in the morning, sometimes 5 in the morning. I tried them but I couldn't sing on them. They just dried me up and I'd spend my time singing very badly and and croakily and chewing my lip. But of course the other guys the band would play guitars and instruments and it didn't bother them.

Me: Can you tell the story about the show in Denmark I think it is in 1965?

Roger: In our first tour of Europe they were away from home and were kind of let of their leash if you like. They managed to get hold, and I don't know where they got them from, a huge enormous stash of amphetamine. at first they were doing one pill every night and things got a bit louder and a little bit faster. That's the kind of thing it does to you, it speeds you up. By the end of the tour, the vey last night this incredible bunch of musicians were playing really badly. Everything was played so fast I could hardly get the words in. They were playing so loud is was a cacophony. I decided to do something while they were smashing up the gear at the end of the show, which is what we used to do in those days. I got hold of their stash and I flushed it down the toilet.

Me: Haha. How did the bad react to that?

Roger: It upset Keith Moon rather badly, who came straight off stage looking for his stash. He said, "Where's it gone?" I said, "I flushed it." He attacked me with a tambourine, which sounds like a pretty soft instrument. Soft pig skin face of the tambourine when you say it, but what he was attacking me with he was slashing at me with the bells, which makes it a whole different weapon. Needless to say he didn't get very far and ended up on the floor and I got thrown out of the band for five days.

Me: Why didn't you do the drugs with them? You made a smart choice, but what was your thinking? 

Roger: I made the decision really early on that I really cared more about being a good singer and delivering a good show to my audience than doing any of the other stuff. Any of the parrying, any of that other stuff. I just had to do something because this was getting so out of hand now, this was going to destroy this wonderful machine that we put together.

Me: In the book you said something about the ones you were tough with are still around and the ones you weren't tough with are no longer here. That's tough, sir. Have you made peace with that?

Roger: Well, I was just saying it like it was because those days we knew very little about rehabilitation, very little about A.A. and N.A. and all those groups that someone could join to get help. I was floundering, we were all wondering watching Keith self destruct. It was very painful. And I just wish I've, I don't know how I would've done it, maybe it was deemed to be how it ended up, I sometimes wish we could have done more and certainly think with our management, who we lost Kip Lambert for instance, through drugs we could have done more but we didn't know in those days. We were completely ignorant on how to get help.

Me: Do you think it's a debunking of the excess of rock and roll what you said?

Roger: No, some people loved it. I just felt ostracized from that world. In the early 60s we used to hang around at the same clubs. The Stones. the Beatles, Jim Hendrix, your dad. Everyone used to see every quite regularly in the clubs. Then when the drugs started to kick in, cocaine and the serious drugs started to kick in people would split up into groups. It'll be the few that didn't and the majority that did and the majority that did because very boring to the few that didn't, and probably vice versa. 

Me: In the book you said you expected that call about Keith Moon way before you actually got it. You had a feeling about him, right?

Roger: Yes, that's absolutely true. He seemed to have nine lives and there were so many times where he almost should've died from what he'd done to himself but he always kind of pulled through it. But that kind of destructive behaviour had been so out of control for probably the last four years of his life that when it did finally come it kind of made it more shocking. I don't know why that was but I always thought he'd bounce back and one day he didn't.

Me: Do you still think about him?

Roger: Oh, yeah. I'm working on a film project at the moment that I've been working on for 30 years because I got a clear idea of a film and how I want it to be about Keith Moon. It won't be Carry On, Keith. He was an extraordinary character, a character that I never met anyone in my life come close to. He was absolutely extraordinary.

Me: I think it's cool you and Pete are still making music and touring. Why do you think you and Pete made it out on the other side and the others didn't?

Roger: Ummm. Discipline. A lot of discipline. Luck. We're full of luck and the love of each other. Some reason or the other we respect each other. I think there was one time when Pete was very, very bad and that was again he was still grieving for Keith, realising we got ourselves into a position where for him a writer it was becoming increasingly pressurised. Pete got very bad onto heroin and I managed to go and see him and spent four hours talking to him. To his credit and to his intelligence and his wisdom he checked into rehab the next day. They're the reason we survive. We respect each other.

Me: How are you and Pete getting along now?

Roger: Oh, can't stand each other.

Me: Hahahahahahaha. Is that so?

Roger: Noooo! We're kind of brothers. Like he says we've been "married" for 60 years. Not quite like that, but it's more than friendship, it's kind of more than family, there'd a deep, deep empathy. I could only speak for me but I'm sure what I get from Pete is a deep caring about me and I care deeply about him.

Me: Okay, so, on the album cover for the album "The Who Sell Out" you are in a bath full of baked beans. I'll show it here...


Me: What's the story about that?

Roger: Ha. It's interesting, really. We were making the album as you said called "The Who Sell Out." To do the album cover I turned up last and I got the short straw. I got the joy of sitting in the tub full of baked beans, which doesn't sound bad, I'm not anything against baked beans apart from the fact that this Victorian bath tub I was sitting in had a hundred weight of baked beans that come straight out from the fridge, so they were kind of like 33 degrees. Of course after about three minutes my teeth were chattering, In his wisdom the photographer got a two by four electric fire and stuck it around the back of the bath and within of twenty minutes after that the back of the bath started to bubble, the front of the bath hadn't changed at all, and I ended up with pneumonia. But it's a fabulous album cover. It's one of my favourite records too.

Me: I love it too. I like how you said in the book you should have just stirred the beans.

Roger: Yeah, I should have stirred it like a bath.

Me: Okay, so, if you could talk to the 15-year-old Roger Daltrey right now what would you say to him?

Roger: Oh, god, that's a big question. Can I have a few weeks to think about it? Haha. I mean I don't know. I have to say expect a few bumps and a few knocks but just carry on with your vision and keep going. I don't know, that's an impossible question to answer.

Me: Okay, so what would you say to Mr, Kibblewhite if you could talk to him now?

Roger: If I could talk to him now I'd say thanks a lot, which I said initially under my breathe as a fuck you kind of remark, as an arrogant anger if youth. But now I'll say to him a real thank you because I'd understand that drove me in a way and if he hadn't of said it there's so many ways I could've gone wrong.

Me: In the book you say "Behind Blue Eyes" is your favorite Who song. Why is that?

Roger: Ummm, well both Pete and I have the same colour blue eyes so it's a kind of link between him and me. I love the melody, I love the bittersweet quality of it. I sang it in a day when I was completely in bits, on the day my first dog, my first pet got ran over. She had blue eyes, she was a pointer, and her name was Nellie. So all this blues stuff was going on in my head. It's just got this quality to it, it's kind of haunted. I just love it.

Me: Roger, thanks so much for being on the Phile. Please come back again, I have soooooo many more questions for you.

Roger: Okay, all the best to you.




Man, that was so freaking cool! I hope to have him back on the Phile again. That about does it for this entry of the Phile.Thanks to my guest Roger Daltrey for the interview. The Phile will be back tomorrow with voice actress Laura Summer. Spread the word, not the word. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.

































I don't want you, cook my bread, I don't want you, make my bed, I don't want your money too, I just want to make love to you. - Willie Dixon

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