Pheaturing Phile Alum Harry Shearer

 

Hey there, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Monday. How are you? Another big yikes goes to former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani, as President Donald Trump announced that his personal lawyer has now tested positive for the coronavirus. Giuliani, a politician known for cleaning up the streets of New York, has made headlines recently for seemingly asinine issues that aren’t necessarily politically relevant. Nevertheless, the public has eaten Giuliani up, and I can’t really blame them. Giuliani, 76-years-old, was admitted to MedStar Georgetown University Hospital in Washington, but no one’s sure when he actually contracted the virus. Over the last month, the Republican politician has been traveling all over the country, fighting the 2020 presidential election results that put Democrat Joe Biden as the new president-elect. Trump’s personal attorney has traveled specifically to Pennsylvania, Michigan, Arizona, and Michigan. In Michigan, he was seen in the House of Representatives arguing the alleged voter fraud without a mask. Not to mention, other bodily processes were definitely heard as well. The next day, Giuliani was at another hearing at the Georgia Senate Judiciary Committee, contesting that state’s results. And even then, some of the state senators were maskless. A spokesperson for the Georgia State senate told ABC News, “Senate staff members who were present in the committee room for the hearings have been instructed to work from home until they have an opportunity to take a COVID test and receive the results.” Giuliani’s assisting attorney, Jenna Ellis, was with him when he attended the White House senior staff Christmas party last week, and she actually had contracted COVID-19 over the summer. Giuliani also appeared on an interview on Fox News with Maria Bartiromo and has been added to the list of White House officials who have had the virus. Along with the president himself and his family, first lady Melania Trump, their son Barron, White House press secretary Kayleigh McEnany, campaign adviser Chris Christie, and Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Ben Carson have also tested positive for COVID-19. Giuliani’s son, Andrew Giuliani, who is a special assistant to President Trump, also tested positive for COVID-19, with Donald Trump Jr. testing positive a day later.

"Dancing With The Stars" fans are incredibly loyal to the show’s former host Tom Bergeron. The veteran "DWTS" host, who was also known for hosting "America’s Funniest Home Videos," was fired along with his co-host Erin Andrews, after hosting for 28 seasons. And now, even with Tyra Banks as the new host, the show’s fans want him back. But, he has no intentions of doing so. Fans have been raving on social media, begging ABC to bring back their beloved longtime host. But even if they did, Bergeron explained that he really has no intentions of returning and that he’s been enjoying his downtime since he got fired. He told "Entertainment Tonight," “When people say, ‘I’m not gonna watch until you’re back,’ I say, ‘Well, there’s really no until here,'” and further explaining, “This train has left the station.” Although Bergeron “appreciate[s] the sentiment” and doesn’t “hold it against anybody” who still currently watches the show, he still positively expresses how much he loved working on the show, using this as an opportunity to reflect on some of the good memories made with “the friendships [he had] with people who were on camera and behind the camera.” “I used to throw midseason parties for cast and staff. It helped create a sense of solidarity,” Bergerson recalled, “And then we’d try to sober up the next day.” And he’s clearly content with how much hosting he’s done in his career, explaining, “I’ve hosted every format imaginable. There’s no real fire in my gut to do it again. Having said that, I’m always open to surprises.” Executive producer Andrew Llinares defended the decision to fire and replace Bergeron and Andrews, despite criticisms, back in September, saying, “It’s all about evolution. Any show like this that has been on for many, many seasons needs to continue to evolve. So I think changing that host is all about evolution. It was all about making the show feel fresh, making it feel new and make it reach out to a new audience... as well as the audience that’s been there for years.” “I think it’s really refreshed the pace of the show. It’s taken it to a new place, in terms of moving fast and feeling different. I think that there’s a real danger when a show has been on for a long time that the audience almost gets bored of the rhythm of it. It doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with it, just that it gets a little boring,” he added. “I think it’s changed the rhythm of the show in a really exciting way. I think Tyra is doing an amazing, amazing job.” To me, it’s refreshing to see peace amidst a situation that could’ve potentially stirred up some typical Hollywood celeb drama. I think it attests to how wonderful Bergeron is in handling what happened to him and Andrews. The world as we know it, just wants him to act up a certain way for some spicy gossip. Keep staying classy, Tom Bergeron. By the way, I have never seen an episode of that dancing show. 

A former presidential candidate has a plan for getting people who are skeptical of a coronavirus vaccine to get the shot. Their planning includes paying them $1,500. According to former U.S. Representative John Delaney, D-Md, “The faster we get 75% of this country vaccinated, the faster we end COVID and the sooner everything returns to normal.” Pfizer and Moderna have both applied with the U.S. Food and Drug Administration for an emergency use authorization for their coronavirus vaccines during the pandemic. Roll out and approval could happen in just a matter of days, with long-term care residents and healthcare workers to be the first in line to get the shots. The general public won’t get COVID-19 vaccines until at least March or April, according to several Home Health officials. But, there still remains a fair amount of skepticism about the vaccine, due to the fact that it has been rolled out way faster than any previous vaccine. A Gallup poll released on November 17th found that 42% of Americans do not agree with getting the vaccine which was approved by the FDA. Seven percent said that the rush timeline was a concern for them. Other people cited the need to confirm that it is actually safe and effective while being approved by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Twelve percent stated that they generally don’t trust any vaccine. On his decision, Delaney told CNBC, “We have to create, in my judgment, an incentive for people to really accelerate their thinking about taking the vaccine,” Nobody would be forced to participate if they don’t want to. So if you can only spend $400 billion, this is what you should spend it on.” The state of the program will cost around $380 billion, which is more than $270 billion in the United States spent on the $1,200 coronavirus stimulus checks that went out earlier this year. The odds of another direct payment to Americans, regardless of whether it is tied to any vaccinations, are not looking favorable. Some members of Congress this week embraced a $908 billion approach that would then establish $300 per week jobs with benefits, send $160 billion to help local and state governments, boost universities and schools, revive the popular paycheck protection subsidies for several businesses, and bailout airlines in transit systems. Unfortunately, there will be no money for any direct payment stimulus check. As of December 4th, there have been 14.2M coronavirus cases with 276K related COVID-19 deaths. 

Archie McPhee, a noted poison purveyor masquerading as a novelty item company, has a new flavor of candy cane formulated specifically to make kids lose faith in Santa. And God. The new candy cane is kale flavored, because if there’s one demographic not being served by Santa’s candy factory in the North Pole it’s the children of fanatical vegan humanists who won’t let their kids celebrate the holidays of an oppressive, patriarchal, colonialist society. In reality, Archie McPhee knows what they’re doing here. They’re trolling. They’re creating abominations as a form of marketing. Kale canes get clicks! No more pesky holiday flavors to worry about, just the bitter grassiness of your favorite vegetable. Archie McPhee also sells ham flavored candy canes, pizza flavored candy canes, mac & cheese flavored candy canes, coal flavored candy canes, bacon flavored candy canes, and pickle flavored candy canes. Worst of all, Archie McPhee sells a flavor of candy cane so foul that even just thinking about it is gag-inducing... Clam flavored candy cane. These people are sick. This is Frankenstein, Jurrasic Park levels of man’s scientific hubris run amok. On the plus side kale candy canes, clam candy canes, ham candy canes and so on all offer incredible opportunities to trick your friends and family into eating awful things.

Either Floyd Mayweather is going broke or Floyd Mayweather and Logan Paul are both laughing at us on their way to the bank together. Both could be true. In perhaps the most lopsided boxing match in the history of the sport, perhaps the greatest of all-time, Floyd Mayweather will take on YouTube star Logan Paul in what’s being called a boxing “exhibition” on February 20th of 2021. The announcement comes on the back of Logan’s bother Jake, winning a heavily anticipated boxing match against former NBA star Nate Robinson. The Paul brothers have seemingly shifted some of their focus from YouTube to boxing recently. 

Instead of doing this blog thing I should be listening to this album...

I just like the cover. If you are looking for a naughty Christmas card that will get your man feeling jolly how about this one?

Hmmm. If you are looking for an ornament how about a pandemic ornament? 

This exactly what we need on our trees. Yes, it’s been a crazy year, but we’re so lucky to be here celebrating Christmas! This Christmas ornament will be a funny reminder about everything we’ve been through in 2020. You know that Elf on a Shelf thing? You never know what he is up to...

Did you ever notice that characters from "The Simpsons" look scary when they are looking face on? Take a look...

Yeesh. Did you ever watch "Antique Roadshow"? You never know what you're gonna see on that show.

Hahaha. So, some NFL teams have changed their logo this year... like this one...

So, sometimes I like to go on Twitter and look up certain words. One of those words is "Foghat" and this is a tweet I saw back in March...

Hahahaha. Okay, here's a story about this fucked up state I live in...

Uh… what in the world is going on in Florida? I’m really starting to worry about you a bit, I feel like we need to sit down and have a talk over a nice cup of tea because this is getting ridiculous. Apparently, Florida is now looking for an unidentified man who stole cat blood. Yes, you’re read that right, cat blood from an animal clinic. According to news outlet St.augustine.com, security footage shows an unknown male walking up to the door of the Anastasia cat clinic in St. Augustine. He then decided to pick up an Antech Diagnostics blood box that was filled with multiple samples of cat blood that had been left, likely to be picked up for analysis. Twenty minutes later, a man with similar clothing was seen getting out of a truck in the parking area. The truck driver was seen walking up to the clinic store while carrying the box back to his truck before driving away. The contents inside the medical blood box, which reportedly contain four vials of cat blood, are estimated to be a whopping $600. Authorities are still searching for the man, despite the incident happening on September 17th, 2020. According to the St. Johns County Sheriff’s Office spokesperson Chuck Mulligan, the motivation for this weird and abnormal crime is still unclear. So, while it might not be easy to come to some conclusions as to what the real motive behind is, authorities did note that cat blood is not a known trade item in the United States. As far as human blood, roughly 2.3% of the United States exports in global trade in 2017 was made up of animal and human blood, which totaled to $28.8 billion from plasma exports. This according to data from Comtrade, which is a project of the United Nations Statistics Division. Now, all I have to say about this weird incident is that I really hope this man had a good motive behind him stealing the feline plasma. Because if it’s for personal use, that is just weird and disgusting, but then again it’s Florida we’re talking about so I wouldn’t doubt it if the skies nonchalantly drinking it every morning. Gross.

Hahahaha. If you spot the Mindphuck let me know, kids. Okay, let's take a live look at Port Jeff, shall we? 

Oh, boy. Looks cold there. Wanna know how cold it is? It's 31°F there. Dang. 

Imagine being completely naked in a room full of people who speak a different language and everyone wants to touch you. This is the life of a dog.

The 141st book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club is...

Michael will be on the Phile a week from today... this coming Monday. 

Hahaha. I had to use that graphic. Today's guest is a Phile Alum and an American actor, voice actor, comedian, writer, musician, radio host, director and producer. His latest album "The Many Moods Of Donald Trump" is available on iTunes and Amazon. Please welcome back to the Phile... Harry Shearer.

Me: This is so cool, Harry. Welcome back to the Phile. How have you been? 

Harry: Hey, I'm fine. I almost dozed off but I'm fine. 

Me: You have done so many things, Harry, when someone yells "get me Harry Shearer!" what do you think they are looking for? 

Harry: Honestly it's been years since somebody yelled that. I have no idea. I was in the Christopher Guest movie because we've been collaborators for years and we trust each other and have fun together. The last movie I did, I'm not going to mention its name, because it's too bad to watch but I found myself asking the same question even while we were in the middle of shooting it. I found out the answer and it was not a pleasant one. 

Me: What? Why is that? 

Harry: Because on the last day of shooting the director comes over with his cellphone and says, "My son is the biggest fan of 'The Simpsons,' would you mind...?" And I realized that's why he cast me on this good for nothing part just so he can ask me that question. 

Me: Do you get to chose which projects you want to do this time on your life? 

Harry: No, most of what I've been doing the last little while is sort of self generated. I'm in there fortunate position to self generate projects so I do things that I find interesting. I did a television series in the U.K. where I got a bunch of people together and we reenacted word for word, pause for pause, melody for melody, some of the craziest scenes from the Nixon White House tapes. I wanted to do it and I've done Nixon so much I thought, yeah, they'll hire me. I tend to do now my own projects. 

Me: You played Nixon and now you're playing Trump. This is amazing, I have to show this pic from a video... 

Me: What is the secret of capturing Trump's character when you are writing it? 

Harry: I think the secret at the base of most of my stuff is anger. I think there's one guy that I've never done a characterization of that I actually admire. That was the recently retired Dodgers baseball announcer Vin Scully. I just couldn't help doing Vin because his voice has been coming out of cars all over Los Angeles for decades. 

Me: I have no idea who that is, but I will look him up. So, anger is the key? 

Harry: Yeah, usually its anger. Or at least mild irritation. That's sort of the grain in the oyster that produces the pearl. 

Me: Ha. So, I love the song from the album called "Son In Law." Tell the readers who the song is about. 

Harry: "Son In Law" is a song about Ivanka Trump's husband Jared Kushner, a real estate developer who is one of Donald Trump's top advisors. 

Me: Of all people to sing about, Harry. What made you want to parody that relationship? 

Harry: Well, we do have peace with the United Arab Emirates with whom we've never been at war. So that's what Jared Kushner has accomplished lately. You know, there's an old saying in politics: don't hire family because you can never fire them and I think we're seeing that worked out in real life right before our eyes. It's the kind of people he choses to be around I speak of and the kind of relationships he has. 

Me: I would never chose family members for anything like that, or want to work with them. Why do you think he does? 

Harry: I think in his point of view he thinks he's more in control if its family. The inability to fire them I don't think it bothers him as much as the fact he believes he doesn't' to have to doubt his loyalty. 

Me: So, explain the picture of Trump I just showed, sir. 

Harry: It uses stop motion animation and other "deep fake" technologies to make it look like Trump is singing the song. Co-created with Matt Hermans of the Electric Lens Co. and Michela Ledwidge of MOD Studio in Sydney, Australia, the video involved myself wearing a body suit, a special helmet and gloves, and emulating Trump's movements and gestures. 

Me: It's very creepy and makes me think of the future how people can use that technology and make entertainment. What was that like for you? 

Harry: I'm actually doing the whole physical performance, wearing a suit, wearing a camera helmet, wearing special gloves. Those moves as well as the face are mine, the facial movies, but they are transmuted by motion capture animation and some other technologies into Donald Trump's persona. 

Me: Is it a bit off-putting for you? 

Harry: No, I'm an actor, this goes to more acting philosophy but I like to disappear behind the characters I play. I like people to be surprised if they discover that's him there too. I've had fights with people over the years who want exactly the opposite of that. "I know you're doing a character but I want to see you." So, this is almost getting right to my dream state. 

Me: What have you learnt on how to play Trump, what you have to do with your body and what you had to do with your voice? 

Harry: Nixon's body was a lot closer to my body shape than Trump's is, so it's having to learn to perform as if I'm a much heftier man, and taller. That's not so much as the heftiness of the guy and I'm being kind of course. That's really the main adjustment I had to make, and then they are as you see in the video he speaks a lot with his hands, especially his right hand. But as you watch his press conferences there are these wavy motions that he's always doing with both hands. He also makes a vertical slicing move with his hands very often when he's talking about something. I really can't figure out what they mean, but I just know they happen. 

Me: You have played many different politicians, Harry, what's the biggest change you've seen in politicians over the years? 

Harry: Oh, I would say that Trump is a one-off in the sense that whether they were Democrats or Republicans, they all seemed to obey the same set of norms and conventions. And this guy doesn't. To put it most vividly for me in my experience the stuff that Nixon said in private... and he said it all... Trump says in public. If you play the Nixon tapes it sounds like Trump is talking. But Trump's doing it in public. Everyone else no matter what other peculiarities they've had, all the presidents that I've known about in my lifetime had at least a scintilla of a sense of shame. And this guy has no such thing. And that makes a difference. 

Me: Okay, so you have another song called "COVID-180." So, what were you doing right before the pandemic happened? 

Harry: I was on tour in Australia. 

Me: What does it feel for you to have to slow down a little bit during the pandemic? 

Harry: To tell you the truth I'm one of the few very lucky people who have continued working throughout. The TV shows I'm associated with have remained in production throughout. The big changes for 31 and a half years I would say can I do this at home, I have a studio that I do my radio show in every week, can I do my parts from home? "No, you have to come in. You don't have the facilities, you don't have the equipment that we do." Beginning of this year they sent me a microphone and said, "Would you please do these recordings from home now?" I'm safe to view somewhere between sympathy and empathy almost what everybody else is going through in this and feeling bad for them. I feel incredibly lucky for myself. It's ridiculous. 

Me: So, I have to mention this, you got in trouble with saying something about "The Simpsons," right? 

Harry: In recent months, I came under fire for comments I made about "The Simpsons" producers' decision to no longer use white actors to voice non-white characters. I said, "The job of the actor is to play someone they're not. That's the gig, that's the job description." 

Me: And you got in trouble for that? 

Harry: That quote was a general statement. It was immediately misinterpreted as me publicly criticizing the show, which I wasn't and was not doing. I just think that generally its good to remember that there is a difference between representation, which is important, to have people of all backgrounds represented in the decision-making parts of all commercial creative enterprises. Thew writing and the producing, where all the decisions are made. Performance is not about representation. Performance is about skill at being who you're not. And I think the two are quite different. 

Me: Do you understand why black actors are upset that these opportunities are take away from them though? 

Harry: If it's about opportunity, yes I do. But in this particular case a cartoon show is not casting a different actor for each part, that's not how they work. They work economically, that's the reason I was hired in the first place. I can do a lot of different characters. It works in various ways, I was in London at the beginning of the year and saw my friend Wendall Pierce, who is a wonderful actor from New Orleans killing it in a huge hit on the London stage playing Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman, and Wendall's black. That should be allowed too. 

Me: I think that's a big difference, there is a history of white people playing black roles in cartoons, am I right? 

Harry: Well, I think there's also a big difference with stereotype and character. The cases you are talking about early on are not performances of characters, they were performances of racial stereotypes. I think at the very minimum that's lazy and at the maximum incredibly hurtful. 

Me: Doctor Hibbert is black in every way on "The Simpsons," Harry. 

Harry: No, he's not. In fact a parody is someone who was on television at the time, he was created who was known as the whitest black man on television. 

Me: Yeah, he was a parody of Bill Cosby. 

Harry: Yeah. There't not a scintilla of accent or anything. There was never any attempt on my part to do a black voice. I was doing a voice, there is no trace of accent or any type of indentation of me going look, now I'm playing a black guy. So what's that worth, that's worth that. 

Me: Here is a pic of the doctor... he looks black to me. 

Me: What will happen to the character now, sir? 

Harry: There's been a black actor who is part of the supporting cast on the show who has been assigned that part. 

Me: So, doing a lot of satire does not make it any easier for you to watch the news than it does for us? 

Harry: It makes it necessary. It's part of the gig. From a very early age I was lazy enough to rather have to dream up situations for comedy I could just watch the news and steal those. 

Me: And there's plenty of news, right? 

Harry: That's right. Now I'm selective. Some I watch for the buffoonery and some I watch for information, some I watch for both. 

Me: Thanks so much for being back on the Phile and debating with me. Haha. Please come back again. 

Harry: Thank you, Jason.

That about does it for this entry of the Phile. Dr. Hibbert is totally a black character. Look at the pic of him and his family...

I arrest my case, judge. Hahaha. Anyway, thanks to Harry for a cool interview. The Phile will be back on Wednesday with actress Maya Hawke, who plays Robin in "Stranger Things." Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye. Kiss your brain.

I don't want you, cook my bread, I don't want you, make my bed, I don't want your money too, I just want to make love to you. - Willie Dixon