Pheaturing Deadmau5

Hello, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Monday. How are you? So in retrospect, in 2015, not a single person got the answer right to "Where do you see yourself in five years from now?" A New York nursing student named Emily Patysiak was fired by Southside Hospital after her bosses caught wind of a series of racist messages disparaging her patients. Her message claims her hospital patients are "all gang members that are Spanish and black," goes on to complain about her taxes supporting "Spanish people who have 9 babies and don't work," and finishes by proudly stating she is glad "Trump is trying to fix it." The messages were uploaded by the Instagram user _boomz13 on Thursday, alongside an indicting caption about racism in healthcare. In the caption they wrote about how Paysiak's attitude is emblematic of some of the racism in the health care industry. "This right here is why I feel my cousin didn't get the proper treatment after he was shot in March. These are the kind of people that work in hospitals, these are the kind of people who take jobs to help people...@_emilka_p_ you're despicable and you deserve to be fired. The messages show the user of the account allegedly belonging to Patysiak making racist comments." While Patysiak was quick to delete her Instagram account, it didn't take long for her racist admissions to make the rounds, with people tagging Southside Hospital to demand they take action. The hospital quickly responded, ensuring people they were investigating the matter. People were quick to demand the hospital fire her, not merely investigate her views, since it's clear where she stands on many of her patients. After receiving Internet backlash on Twitter and Instagram, Northwell Health told NBC New York they fired Patysiak from Southside Hospital. "Understandably, the comments caused hurt, pain and anger among those who saw them. Northwell condemns and does not tolerate any form of hate, racism, discrimination and harassment," the hospital said.
Imagine having the audacity to get into an argument with a law professor, whose job is to teach people how to argue. When Whittier Law School professor Patricia Leary wore a Black Lives Matter to class, and a few of her students were outraged. Not because a t-shirt presumably goes against the school's unofficial dress code, but because they took personal offense to their teacher expressing support for black people's rights not to be murdered. "The statement you represented and endorsed is... highly offensive and extremely inflammatory," the anonymous group identifying as Concerned Students wrote. "We are here to learn the law. We do not spend three years of our lives and tens of thousands of dollars to be subjected to indoctrination to the personal opinions of our professors." The group went as far as saying, "ALL lives matter," in ALL-CAPS and in bold, telling the professor that she should be ashamed of herself. Professor Leary responded to her students with a two-part legal memo, opening it by calling them cowards for remaining anonymous. "I am accepting the invitation in your memo, and the opportunity created by its content, to teach you. I would prefer to do it through a conversation, or especially through a series of conversations. Because I don’t know who you are. This isn’t possible," she wrote. Part I of Professor Leary's memo "addresses the substantive and analytical lessons that can be learned from the memo," and Part II roasts their writing skills. "Premise: You are not paying for my opinion. Critique: You are not paying me to pretend I don’t have one. Premise: There is something called 'Law' that is objective, fixed, and detached from and unaffected by the society in which it functions. Critique: Law has no meaning or relevance outside of society. It both shapes and is shaped by the society in which it functions. Law is made by humans. It protects, controls, burdens, and liberates humans, non-human animals, nature, and inanimate physical objects. Like the humans who make it, Law is biased, noble, aspirational, short-sighted, flawed, messy, unclear, brilliant, and constantly changing. If you think that Law is merely a set of rules to be taught and learned, you are missing the beauty of Law and the point of law school. Premise: You know more about legal education than I do. Critique: You don’t." Professor Leary also challenges the Concerned Students on their assumption that Black Lives Matter means that non-black lives don't. "Premise: There is an invisible 'only' in front of the words 'Black Lives Matter.' Critique: There is a difference between focus and exclusion. If something matters, this does not imply that nothing else does. If l say 'Law Students Matter' it does not imply that my colleagues, friends, and family do not. Here is something else that matters: context. The Black Lives Matter movement arose in a context of evidence that they don’t. When people are receiving messages from the culture in which they live that their lives are less important than other lives, it is a cruel distortion of reality to scold them for not being inclusive enough." She also explains that she wore the shirt on campus that day because that day in her Criminal Procedure class, they were discussing police violence on the black community. "Unless you speak for the Black Lives Matter movement you have no authority to say what those words mean to the people in it," Leary explains. "You certainly have no authority to say (and apparently not even any knowledge of) what it means to me. Your interpretation of something and your reaction to it based on that interpretation are not the some as what something actually means. Things in the world have meanings that exist outside of you." To put it in less professorial terms, the prof called the butt hurt students ignorant citizens and terrible writers, and the Internet loved it.
People have raised mor than $35,000 in tips for a Starbucks employee after an entitled customer attempted to shame him on Facebook. A woman named Amber Lynn Gilles, who has also been dubbed "San Diego Karen" angrily posted a photo of a Starbucks employee Lenin in an attempt to shame him. In her short but to the point post, Gilles threatened to get the police involved the next time Lenin refuses to serve her for not wearing a mask. "Meet Lenen from Starbucks who refused to serve me cause I’m not wearing a mask. Next time I will wait for cops and bring a medical exemption." It wasn't long before her post blew up, drawing backlash from commenters who encouraged her to take her business elsewhere, and pointed out the selfishness of not wearing a mask during a pandemic. People were also quick to point out the fact that most medical issues don't provide an exemption for a cloth mask, and if Gilles truly had one... she would already have the doctor's note on hand. It wasn't long before people started pulling receipts of other posts by Gilles, including a few that go travel down anti-vaxxer conspiracy theory rabbitholes. Luckily, Gilles' sheer entitlement completely backfired, and people started a GoFundMe to tip the employee, who was identified as Lenin Gutierrez. The man who started the GoFundMe, Matt Cowan, wrote, "Raising money for Lenin for his honorable effort standing his ground when faced with a Karen in the wild." After the GoFundMe reached $10,000, Lenin made a thank you video for all of the people who supported him both financially and emotionally online. If Gilles has learned anything from her massive backfire on Facebook, it's that the strangers of the Internet stand with Lenin, and the scientifically proven reasons we should all be wearing masks.
First daughter Ivanka Trump continues to tweet despite the fact that it often results in her being mocked and/or becoming a meme. Love her or hate her, you have to respect that she does not let continuous public roasting prevent her from putting herself out there again and again. And again. Most recently, Ivanka tweeted an article about how Donald Trump is now looking to hire people in federal positions based on their "skills."

In the article announcing Trump's plan for the government's new skill-based hiring process, his daughter Ivanka, who is the co-chair of the American Workforce Policy Advisory Board, is quoted as saying, "We are modernizing federal hiring to find candidates with the relevant competencies and knowledge, rather than simply recruiting based on degree requirements. We encourage employers everywhere to take a look at their hiring practices and think critically about how initiatives like these can help diversify and strengthen their workforce." Ivanka Trump, Presidential advisor, was famously not hired for her qualifications nor for her "skills" in the realm of politics. Neither was her husband Jared Kushner. People were quick to point this out. Better luck next time, Ivanka! Don't give up.
There’s no doubt that if we actually stood behind criminals, we would maybe stand behind this “criminal,” if you can even call him that. Thirty-five-year-old Anthony Helinski, who probably should’ve been awarded “Dopest Dad Ever,” from Lawrence, Massachusetts, had been arrested at the Mall at Rockingham Park in Salem, New Hampshire, after helping his toddler steal prizes from one of the mall’s claw game machine. Via Salem Police Department Previously a middle school teacher at Doherty Middle School in the city of Andover, Helinski turned himself into Salem Police Department with his attorney Christopher Coughlin in September 2018, after finding out there was a warrant for his arrest. I mean, come on, this guy is practically a saint! Luckily, because he pleaded guilty to lesser charges of criminal trespass, the Massachusetts teacher’s sentence only included a $1,000 fine with the possibility of a half-suspension pending good behavior, 90 days in the House of Corrections with the possibility of complete suspension for two years pending good behavior, $100 restitution, a two-year ban from the Salem mall, and counseling before March 2019. Within the next six months, Helinski would be required to appear in front of Judge Robert Stephen to assure he completed his counseling and prove that he’s completed 50 hours of community service. He also was allowed his freedom on personal recognizance. Phew! If it was any worse, I don’t think I could’ve gotten any angrier. According to his Facebook, it looks like he’s back teaching at Doherty Middle School.
Instead of doing this blog thing I should be listening to this album...

Ummm... maybe not. So, yesterday was my first day back to work. I had a ling day in class about all the new park policies of what is going to be different when the parks reopen mid-July. The first thing I had to do when I got there was wait on line for 45 minutes to get my temperature checked. Then my temperature was checked by this guy...

Kidding! Hahaha. So, most of you know my "outfit" of choice is a t-shirt, shorts and Converse or flip-flops, right? Well, this summer I am thinking go changing my look to something like this...

What do you think? Hahahaha. The Black Lives Matter protests following the murder of George Floyd has brought forth a wave of activism, both substantive and performative. These celebrities likely freaked out their publicists with their poorly-received posts. Like one of my favorite directors
Taika Waititi was called tone-deaf for his take on looters (and also Urban Outfitters).

As the Black Lives Matter movement inspires actions around the world, many churches and other institutions with prime sign real estate are using their platform to voice their support.
Like this Crescent Fort Rouge United Church, Manitoba, Canada...

Hope you’re right, United Church sign-making person. People are standing up for the safety and dignity of black people whether or not its popular in their town. Anti-racist demonstrators are hosting their own protests in small towns and cities. While they may be the only people standing, they're not standing alone. Like this guy in Pell City, Alabama...

If you go to the beach this summer you might see this new beach sign...

I went to the beach over the weekend and got a little sunburnt but not as bad as this guy...

Yikes. If I had a TARDIS I would go to to try and meet Frank Sinatra in the 60s, but knowing my luck he'd be stepping out of a helicopter with a drink in his hand.

I want that pic on a t-shirt. Haha. Yup Brenner by the way took that photo. Most weddings these days, while Instagram-ready, are incredibly expensive and require meticulous planning... With all the stress of finding the right venue, dress, bachelor and bachelorette parties, bridal showers, flowers, dinner, and multi-tiered cake while at the same time handling all family and friend interactions, sometimes people forget the whole reason they're choosing to get married in the first place. While ideally a wedding is a beautiful day to celebrate two people who are in love, things can escalate rapidly when guests try to intervene with the "rules" the couple has set in place. People who disrespect the RSVP cards, family members who insist on bringing their children to an "adults only" wedding, panicked mother-of-the-brides... it's a lot even for Pinterest-planners. Luckily, I'm readily available to solve all of life's moral dilemmas and dramatic wedding situations. So, when a bride was concerned about how she should handle her friend's seeing-eye dog, she emailed me to set the verdict on whether or not she is a good person, or indeed, an "asshole."

"Am I an asshole for not allowing my friend to bring her service animal (guide dog) to my wedding?"  At first glance, it's hard not to judge this bride right away. What kind of selfish monster doesn't let their blind friend bring a guide dog to a wedding? However, let's hear her out... "I will be getting married in September. I have a blind friend who mostly relies on her guide dog. The dog obviously has access rights to all places. Now I am in a sticky situation and I can sense that I will be TA. I have three chronic illnesses that I take 23 pills a day for, severe asthma and you guessed it, an extremely severe dog allergy. Usually when I meet with my friend we meet in the open and I take two allergy pills. However, because of all the other medication I take these pills make me extremely drowsy to the point where I am officially not allowed to drive and I usually crash as soon as I get home from our get togethers. Our wedding will be very intimate, i.e. we will be in relatively small rooms. I feel horrible about this but I don’t think I can let my friend bring her dog. It just wouldn’t work. I talked about it with my fiancé and some friends. Finally, I talked to my friend about it, explained the situation and said I would love her to come but she can’t bring her dog. I said that four of our mutual friends had offered to “be on a roster” and assist her should she need it. Alternatively, if she is not comfortable with this she could bring a person of her choosing to the wedding or I’d pay for a professional aid for the day. I think it is important to note that her dog is not for any additional issues like seizures or anything like that. Unfortunately, she was less than happy with my suggestions. She accused me of being ableist and thinking her disability can be switched off for the day. I understand what I asked was a lot and it is a difficult topic. I told her to tell me if she changes her mind and I’d be happy to make arrangements. But I won’t budge. This is definitely quite the predicament." I was so ready to label you an asshole after reading the email, but I think you have extenuating circumstances for not wanting a service dog (or any dog) at your wedding. I can also understand why your friend would be upset. This probably isn’t the first time someone has tried to stop her from bringing her service dog somewhere. I think this is just a misunderstanding. Your chronic illnesses and allergy are a disability too. I can understand why your friend would be opposed to going out without the guide she is used to and I also get that you wouldn’t want to be asleep/severely drowsy on your wedding day. I would talk to your friend more and see if any of the solutions you mentioned could work or see if either of you could come up with more options. So, there you have it! While under normal circumstances, it would be 100%, grade A "bridezilla" behavior to not allow your friend to bring her guide dog to your wedding, the allergy and drowsiness caused by medication present some challenges. Especially since this bride is offering to come up with solutions and alternatives, hopefully they'll both be able to settle on a compromise so that they can all happily celebrate. Good luck, everyone!

This is a simple one... of you spot the Mindphuck let me know. Oh, this is exciting... someone wanted to stop by and say hello. He's out of business now and I guess has nothing better to do. Please welcome to the Phile...

Me: Ummm... hello, Chuck. How are you?

Chuck: Hiya, Jason. I'm doing okay, I guess. Miss seeing all the kiddies in my restaurant though.

Me: I bet. So, what do you miss about the restaurant?

Chuck: The salty, greasy taste of spice-less chalk and cheese pizza served in those pans that had those little black bumps at the bottom.

Me: Ahhh. So, any exciting stories about your old restaurant you can tell us now that it's closed?

Chuck: Well, it was Jasper T. Jowls' night off and he was waiting for me to get off my shift. I came in for my shift tripping on acid. It was okay for a little while until I started throwing candy at an entire party. That was probably the craziest.

Me: Oh. I was thinking of something more interesting. Thanks for stopping by, Chuck. Please come back again.

Chuck: I sure will, Jason. Bye for now!

Me: Chuck E. Cheese, kids. That wasn't as planned out and as funny as I thought it'll be. Moving on...

Harsh but hilarious. You know I live in Florida, right? Well, here's a story from this crazy state...

What do you do when you find a 17-foot long, 140-pound python with over 70 eggs inside it, ready to hatch, in the wild? My first instinct would be light a running wood chipper on fire and then toss it into that. And then take whatever comes out the other end and run it through again, just to be safe. It’s unclear if this is how officials at Big Cypress National Preserve in Florida handle the invasive monsters but it should be, especially in light of their most recent find. A python that is literally big enough to kill a person. A smarter person may want to kill the python but keep it in order to study the beast. I’m more of an incinerate first, ask questions never kind of guy though. Just look at this thing.

Fortunately for the state of Florida and humanity at large, the Big Cypress National Preserve... along with every other agency even remotely related to animals in the state... is fighting hard against the python invasion. They make it their mission to remove as many of these things from the park as they can, before the killing machines eat every single type of wildlife native to Florida, from swamp rabbits to Hooters regulars. At this point there are so many pythons, and the slithery bastards are so hard to find, that it might just be a better solution to Noah’s Ark all the native Florida species, nuke the rest of the state, then move back in. What else do you do here? Genetically engineer Pit Bull-sized mongooses and release them into the Florida wild? Actually… maybe. And until the state is able to either genetically engineer said mongooses or pass a law that allows it to force incarcerated violent felons to hunt pythons we’re going to see more stories like this.

Let's see what is going on live in Port Jefferson, shall we?

Are those pink flower plants new? I think so. Looks like a nice day there.

Since smart watches can now read your pulse, there should be a feature that erases your browser history if your heart stops beating.

The 130rd book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club is...

Robert De Niro, Jr. will be on the Phile on Friday to talk about his dad and the book. Yes! That Robert De Niro.

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want." The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me." The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says "nothing's wrong"and how I can make a woman truly happy." The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?"

Today's guest is a Canadian electronic music producer, DJ, and musician, who has received six Grammy Award nominations for his work. His latest single "Pomegranate" with the Neptunes is available on iTunes, Amazon and Spotify. Please welcome to the Phile... Deadmau5.

Me: Hello, Deadmau5, welcome to the Phile. How are you?

Deadmau5: I am good. Thank you.

Me: So, what is it like at the Deadmau5 house since the pandemic?

Deadmau5: I feel like I've even working harder from home. Not to say I've never worked from home before. I've been the social distancing champion since 2004. It's not like this is so strange and different. It's like you've been home all day on the computer, how do you feel?

Me: Are you still making music during this at all?

Deadmau5: Yes, for sure. I'm working towards an album release. It'll be out tentatively October or November. Somewhere in there. But I've been mostly working on the music, I've been elaborating with a lot of artists. Most recently the Neptunes on that "Pomegranate" track. A few other ones too that are in the pot too that we haven't released out the wilds so I'm just hoarding all this stuff.

Me: So, what made you want to work with the Neptunes on that song?

Deadmau5: I think it was just one of those serendipitous moments. I kinda had this piece of music laying around.

Me: Who are the Neptunes anyway?

Deadmau5: Pharrell Williams and Chad Hugo.

Me: Ahhh... I know who Pharrell is. So, did you know those guys before?

Deadmau5: I'm not sure how the connection was made again. I did meet up with Pharrell a long time ago in Toronto at the Soho House. It was at one of his events at some clothing thing. I stumbled into him at the Soho House and said, "Hey, I do this thing called Coffee Run. Do you want to get in the car and get some coffee?" He was like, "Sure, man." He was a really cool dude and I just kept him on the burner until I had something that I felt would be up his alley. When it came around to getting something done it was just oh, yeah, Pharrell, let's get him.

Me: Did you learn something new from him? Both of your music styles are so different.

Deadmau5: I tend to say in my lane and I think he does too. I don't want to overstep on a collaboration. The whole thing behind a collaboration to me is taken A and B and putting them together but not necessarily blending them in a big blender. I guess would be a weird way to put it but I put cheese, ground beef, and a little bit of sour cream on a taco shell and I was it. I don't take all that stuff and throw it into a blender, put it on stun and drink it. That was the all time weirdest analogy. 

Me: That's cool. I think I get it. I'm surprised this collaboration was done in person and not online. Does that makes sense?

Deadmau5: A lot of it was but I still prefer the human connection. I love it when working with other artists.

Me: Is it crazy that I'm surprised by that?

Deadmau5: No. This is on a different level. This isn't like some social... this is small talk stuff. It's not schmoozing. It's work. I can get in and participate with people when it comes to getting things done.

Me: Do you like working with other people?

Deadmau5: When working with collaborators, for example, "where's the drop?" which is a symphony that me and Gregory Reveret composed was played by an orchestra. The moral of the story is being able to sit down and be in the room and hear those players, like their were 70 sting players, it was a full orchestra. I'm sitting there in the middle of it listening to it and experiencing that first hand is mind melting. It would have been less impactful for them to do that just send me the ProTools session so I can listen to it on my speakers. In the same way it's like watching Pharrell get up there and do his thing like in front of me in the sound booth and nodding his head and seeing where he's at mentally with the track was rewarding.

Me: So, I read that you have Master Classes. How do you like teaching?

Deadmau5: I feel like I'm a bad teacher but I don't at the same time.

Me: Why is that?

Deadmau5: I really tend to not sugar coat much.

Me: Why not? Sugar coat what?

Deadmau5: I don't know. I watched a few other Master Classes and stuff like that, I'm not going to throw anyone under the bus, but I tend to think this guy might be hamming it a bit. Giving them the "you can do it." No, no they can't. They have to work at it and it takes them ten years, ten thousand hours to master a thing. It's not like gold medals for everyone.

Me: I think that's better advice, man. Not everybody is a winner, am I right?

Deadmau5: Yeah, be prepared to waste a lot of hours.

Me: Who taught you or did you learn that on your own?

Deadmau5: I think it's just something that I endured to be honest. I don't think it was something that I was following a practice like trying to learn something and knowing it would take a long time. It's more an endurance thing. Dedication, the strive to want to get to a point, not knowing how long it was going to take me to get there.

Me: You went online recently and talked to you fans about the protests and the Black Lives Matter movement. What made you decide to speak out?

Deadmau5: I'm behind the movement. I donated to the cause. We are doing a lot stuff. Like a lot of my business is structured in the United States. I'm not being ignorant or dismissive of all problems, but it's horrible, it's just what's happening to my friends and fans in America, they need change and I'm 100% behind it.

Me: On the Phile I mentioned some celebrities are tone-deaf about posting and saying stuff about the protests online, do you agree?

Deadmau5: I know, I know, I understand where you're coming from but it's a situation that's happening that requires a lot of reflection and obviously we are going to see a lot of these kinda knee jerk, "oh my God, I better get into my safe place position on this issue before they come for me." Reactions? Some of them are more identifiable than others. Not to say this is a game. This is happening so we better position ourselves. No, it's a really issue that I think a lot of electronic music producers should take very seriously.

Me: Why do you say that?

Deadmau5: If you think about it, my scene was built off of black Americans. It really was and to see them be discredited by a couple of asshole cops is absolutely an atrocity.

Me: I think artists and even bloggers are all trying to figure out what to do right now. Should we even do anything?

Deadmau5: Well, there's plenty we could do but we don't need to be virtual signaling right now. We need to be donating. I donated to Black Lives Matter and the Color of Change, those are the two forerunners right now for this kinda episodes that are happening.

Me: That makes sense, man. Why do you think you have a good head on your shoulders about this, and I don't mean a huge mouse head. Hahahahaha.

Deadmau5: I'm not by far the most insanely, intuitive, imaginative, philanthropist on matters at hand. I just do what I can.

Me: When do you think people will start going to concerts again? How are you preparing for that? 

Deadmau5: I'm not, to be honest. I'm evolving my business on a weekly basis in a sense. There was a big wake up call with COVID-19 in the sense that nobody was prepared for it. So now we are evolving our businesses to be prepared for things like that. People are prepared to be modular in the sense that okay, I can't play shows but I can sit here and cry myself to sleep how my world is going to come crashing down because no one is paying me to go up on a stage and hit a space bar. I could very well shut down and pray I have enough liquid to carry me through however long it's going to be. Or I can just go back and reassemble and rethink how I kinda want to do things. Now there's two scenarios, one is we're stuck home for a year, two years, ten years, who knows. Or they're going to open up the gates again in six months, or two months, or whatever they're doing. I'm not a pandemicologist, or whatever they call them. So what I'm thinking about and what I'm working on in the day time is a way to interact though a PC platform or Xbox or whatever. Like a video game, kinda like in the vein what "Fortnight" was doing but much more immersive that we are not going to be trapped in their community, their game. I think we are going to star seeing an uprise of these kind of virtual shows, not video streams because that's like watching TV.

Me: It's not the same though, right? I've been watching quite a few concerts online but I miss going to the shows. But then again I'm old and lazy and I don't like going to shows as much as I used to. 

Deadmau5: Yeah, it's not like "I drove three hours to go see REO Speedwagon."

Me: Hahaha. True. Deadmau5, thanks for being on the Phile. I hope this was fun and I hope you will come back soon.

Deadmau5: No problem.

That about does it for this entry of the Phile, kids. Thanks to Deadmau5 for a great interview. The Phile will be back on Thursday with comedian Larry Charles. Spread the word, not the turd... or virus. Don't let snakes or alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.

I don't want you, cook my bread, I don't want you, make my bed, I don't want your money too, I just want to make love to you. - Willie Dixon