Hey, kids, welcome to the Phile for a Sunday. How are you? Let's start with a story about a 90-year-old man giving a perfect 90-year-old man answer to prostitution charges. Nicholas Salerno, 90, of Dennis Port, MA, got himself charged with soliciting a prostitute after he called police to his home to report that a prostitute he'd solicited had stolen a necklace from his home. According to the "Cape Cod Times," when Mr. Salerno was informed that police would be forced to charge him with a crime as well, he replied, "I don't give a shit, I'm 90 years old." Lesson learned, prostitutes: don't steal from a man who has nothing to lose from the revelation that he hires prostitutes. Salerno reported paying Karen Proia, 48, from neighboring West Dennis, $100 to perform an unspecified sex act on June 22nd. The next day, he noticed the necklace missing, and decided not to let his own reputation get in the way of justice. Police later recovered the necklace at an area pawn shop. Both Salerno and Proia have pled not guilty.
Are you guys watching the Olympics? Appropriately, America's first gold medal of the 2016 Rio Olympics was for shooting. Nineteen-year-old Virginia Thrasher has become America's first gold medalist at the 2016 Rio de Janeiro Olympic Games... and in that most American of competitions, shooting. Thrasher, who hails from Springfield, VA and is an engineering major at the West Virginia University, took home gold against her Chinese competitor in the 10m Air Rifle. She will compete again on Aug 11th in the 50m Air Rifle.
It would appear that Justin Bieber only vacations in the nude. Last year, paparazzi photos of the Biebs' nether regions surfaced while he was away on a trip to Bora Bora, and it's happened again. The Biebs and a very attractive blond model are apparently on a trip to Hawaii, and the "New York Daily News" posted pictures today of them both frolicking around completely naked. For now it seems that Justin's habit of being naked in paradise isn't harming anyone. Let's just hope he doesn't decide to go to Disney World next. By the way, I don't care what you think of Bieber... he's a Foghat fan.
In this digital age, sexting is just a normal part of dating. Usually, though, we assume that our dirty texts full of eggplant and winky face emojis are only being seen by the person we send them to. A recent study has revealed that might not be the case. For the study, which was conducted by the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, researchers surveyed 5,085 single adults between the ages of 21 and 75. They found that while 73% of those polled said that they'd be uncomfortable having their sexts being shared, 23% admitted that they had shared sexts that had been sent to them with an average of more than three different friends.The study's author, Justin Garcia, said in a press release, "It raises the question that if someone sends something to you with the presumption that it’s private, and then you share it with others... which, when it comes to sexting, nearly one out of every four single Americans are doing, what do we want to consider that type of violation? Is it just bad taste? Is it criminal?" Maybe we should all re-think it the next time we get the urge to share a sext with a friend. Let's all respect each other's privacy and keep our sexy texts to ourselves.
Did you kids see Suicide Squad? It was okay. Anyway, if you've seen any of the trailers, you'll notice that Harley Quinn's outfit of choice includes a teeny-tiny pair of "shorts" and some fishnet stockings. Practical. But according to Bleeding Cool, Margot Robbie's booty shorts may show more or less booty depending which trailer you are watching. Check it out.
Yep, in the international trailers, Harley's buns are mostly covered. And in the trailer that premiered at San Diego Comic Con and the movie I saw, Harley's shorts were much, much shorter.
So Bleeding Cool has theorized that the folks at Warner Brothers had someone digitally lengthen the shorts for the international version. And look, just call a spade a spade. Even with the digital alterations, those are still not shorts. They're hardly even underwear. This rendition of Harley Quinn is a far cry from the one you are probably familiar with, when Harley wore a full body Harlequin suit. Regardless, get ready to see a whole bunch of ass cheeks hanging out this Halloween. You will probably see more Harley Quinns and Jokers than you've seen since 2008 when The Dark Knight came out and DC movies were actually good.
Are you kids playing "Pokémon Go"? Some people are not only playing the game they are cashing in on it. Like this bakery in Toronto that’s choosing team sides.
Regular price? Ugh. Go Team Instinct. People that know me know that I don't like to break rules. Unlike this guy...
Why is the door closed and why does he look so smug? The sign clearly says 'Do not close the door." He's freakin' crazy. I love kids, and I love it when kids draw. Especially when they draw something that is innocent but looks perverted.
Is that a threat? Haha. So, with "Pokémon Go" I think they ran out of ideas for names for the characters...
Huh? There's a new line of toys that I think is kinda confusing...
What. The. Fuck. Hey, it's summer and one of my favorite things about summer is the bikini. So, this year I thought it'll be fun to show you pictures of women in bikinis with something not so sexy in the background.
Nobody shake that hand. Haha. And now from the home office in Port Jefferson, New York, here is...
Top Phive Startling Similarities And Differences Between Donakd Trump And The Olympics
5. Celebrates the world's wonderful diversity.
4. Is a source of great pride for America.
3. Is on another continent, thank God.
2. Is proceeding, depsite a terrifying lack of preparation.
And the number one similar or difference between Trump or the Olympics is...
1. Takes Russia at its word.
David Huddleston
September 17th, 1930 — August 2nd, 2016
He was in The Big Lebowski and Blazing Saddles... and an absolute SHIT TON of bad TV... and I still can't find any good quotes.
Hahaha. This is a real easy one. If you spot the Mindphuck let me know. Okay, so, my son and I were talking recently how we used to watch "Sesame Street" together. It used to be a fun kids show, but now it is not the same.
The 51st book to be pheatured in the Phile's Book Club is...
The author Brian Watson will be a guest on the Phile in a few weeks.
Today's guest is the lead singer for the Los Angeles based band Races whose CD "Year of the Witch" is available on iTunes. Please welcome to the Phile... Wade Ryff.
Me: Hello, Wade, welcome to the Phile, how are you?
Wade: Doing so good.
Me: Okay, your band is called Races... Didn't you guys have another band name? Black Jesus?
Wade: Yes, we did go by Black Jesus for a short time.
Me: I am glad you changed it, but why did you?
Wade: When we first started we were doing shows as Wade Ryff and Friends, which I always felt was really lame. So in the panic for a new name we settled on Black Jesus mostly because it was a pretty unforgettable name, but I was never really able to own it proudly. Whenever people asked the name of the band I felt sort of embarrassed. I think we were all pretty comfortable with changing the name.
Me: Explain the band name... Races could mean a few different things. Did you have any in mind?
Wade: At the time we were about to release a 7 inch. We had to submit artwork in a matter of days, and had no band name to put on the cover. We had this huge list of band names going, most of them really ridiculous, and we couldn't decide on a name. Syd from Le Savy Fav/French Kiss sent over his list of band names he had been collecting over time in hopes that it might help. Races was one of the names on his list and it just felt right. In terms of meaning, I identify more with races as in a contest rather than races of people. I relate to the name in the sense that it seems like there is always something to be up against, and strong desire to overcome whatever it is.
Me: Okay, enough questions about the band name. Who is in the band? You have six or seven members, right?
Wade: We used to be a 7 piece, but recently lost one of the back up singers. She has her own band where she is a lead vocalist and wanted to be able to focus more on that. Breanna, the keyboard player has taken over her vocal parts. Currently the band is a 6 piece and consists of myself, Oliver Hild on bass, Garth Herberg on guitar, Breanna Wood on vocals and keyboards, Devon Lee on vocals and percussion and Lukas Ventura on drums.
Me: I read that it was supposed to be a one off, before you guys decided to stay together and record. Did you all know each other before hand?
Wade: Ya, the band started as a one off in October of 2009. I was alway a bass player in bands, and had just started writing my own songs. A friend of mine was booking a show and asked if I would open up for him and perform some of my songs. I was to scarred to play alone, so I put together my sort of dream band for a night… All the friends that I always wished I could be in a band with. Most people in the band knew each other, but a few had never met before. Most of us were all in different bands at the time. We kept getting invited to play other shows after that night and just continued performing. Soon after we started working on materiel together and it became a real band rather than friends just backing me up.
Me: Where are you guys based?
Wade: We are based in L.A.
Me: You guys have your first album called "Year of the Witch" and the first song I heard from you guys is "Big Broom." Does the album gonna have a Halloween theme?
Wade: HA! That's funny. I never caught the Halloween-esque relationship between "Big Broom" and "Year of the Witch." I guess upon first glance it could come off that way but I don't see how someone could think it was a Halloween themed record once they listened to the songs and followed the lyrics.
Me: And no offense, but with the original name of the band being Black Jesus and your unChristian themes, you are no way Christians. LOL. And what's this, Wade, you escaped from a real life witch?
Wade: Correct. No offense taken but I have to go now.
Me: Ummm... okey. Can you come back for a follow up interview?
Wade: We would love to come back again. Thanks so much for having us.
Me: Mention your website real quick though...
Wade: Racestheband.com.
Me: Good job, Wade. Take care.
There you go, that about does it for this entry of the Phile. The Phile will be back tomorrow with Ryan McCarthy from Stepdad. Spread the word, not the turd. Don't let snakes and alligators bite you. Bye, love you, bye.
Not if it pleases me. No, you can't stop me, not if it pleases me. - Graham Parker
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